Have you ever wondered why most people don’t achieve their goals, why some people lose their respect and dignity, why some families don’t stand, why some relationships don’t last, why some people end up behind bars? I think I have the answer. Let me give you the answer by telling you my story, but I will start with this: we do not do things because we are influenced, but we do them because we give in to them.
On the New Year eve of 2011, around 4pm, I took my wallet, picked up my phone and I walked out the gate of my house. I went down the street to get super glue and recharge card. Before I left, I called John and I instructed him to pack the plastic chairs that were on the field inside the garage. I jokingly told him to do it fast and return to his post at the gate like Ussain Bolt will do it. I live in a serene area. Although we do witness cases of robbery sometimes, we are still happy we are living in that area. My area is a new site and so there is only one variety shop in the area. Bad enough, the variety shop is far away from where I live. I walked to the variety shop gently thinking of so many things amongst which are the church program that was going to happen that night, what the next year will be like and also my girlfriend.
When I got to the Variety shop, I got what I wanted and I had just walked a few meters away from the variety shop when my phone rang. It was my girlfriend. I picked the call with all gladness, but our conversation made sadness to displace my heart. I began to run towards my home to get my car. I did not know how I got home, but I ran at a speed I never had gone before. John was shocked with the way I ran inside. He thought people were chasing me and he was looking outside and at the same time was asking me what was wrong. All I was saying to him was open the gate. He didn’t yield to my order on time and I had to shout on him while I held his collar tight, I said, “open the gates now or I pull out four of your ribs.” John was terrified and he opened the gate for me.
I jumped into my car and I sped off town. I had a destination, but I was confused which route to take. I was crying as I was driving. I must not lose my mum at this time. It was just 3 months to my wedding and I couldn’t afford to lose my mum. I drove straight to the hospital, ran into the emergency ward and I asked for Mrs. Oluwafolahan. “We have no patient by that name sir.” That was their reply. I almost went crazy and I started describing my mum for the nurses that were on duty. The more I described her, the more the nurses emphasized that my mum wasn’t there. I got so angry, and I broke into the ward looking for my mum. The nurses were holding me down, but they were not capable.
I had looked through the ward and didn’t find my mum. I felt ashamed when the security men came and ordered me out. Didn’t I get the hospital name right, or did they have another branch somewhere else. Tons of things crossed my mind as I reached for my phone to call my girlfriend. I was sweating profusely and I was covered in tears. When my girlfriend picked, she asked me what was wrong. I didn’t get her question, what did she mean? My mum is dying somewhere, was she expecting me to be fine. I told her I got to the hospital and didn’t find my mum. She laughed for a very long time and it shocked me. I looked at the phone and placed it back on my ears. She stopped laughing and said, “I was just joking.”
My heart skipped for seconds, and a great rage took over me. I started shouting on her. I told her it was over between us (I didn’t mean it). She kept begging me, but I refused. I hanged up on her and I drove out of the hospital. She kept calling me, but I didn’t pick. I didn’t bother to look at the screen of the phone. I just kept driving. I left the hospital for my mum’s place to check on her, situations warranted it. Driving from the hospital area to my mum’s place on a normal day takes like 2 hours. But due to the festive period, the duration got elongated by 30 minutes. I was on the road when I angrily switched off my phone, the tone was disturbing. No one was responsible but my lying girlfriend. I switched it off without looking at the screen, I was used to my phone.
Finally, I got to my mum’s place. I met the gates wide opened, it was very unusual. Her car was not at the place she used to park it, and it was not outside. No one was at the gate, the compound seemed deserted. I knocked the door. As I struck my hands against the door, it opened wide. It was then I began to sense danger. I ran inside and I began to call my mum’s name. But I got no response. I searched the whole house and I couldn’t find her. I was confused. I went to get my phone to call her. When I got to my car and picked up my phone, I discovered it was switched off. I switched it on and I became restless due to the long booting of the phone. When my phone finished booting, I discovered I had 23 missed calls, 10 from my girlfriend and 13 from our family doctor. I ignored that and I dialed my mum’s phone number. It began to ring and I felt relieved. “Hello!” It was the voice of our family doctor that I heard. I made enquiry on what happened to my mum and what she was doing with my mum’s phone. She asked if I didn’t see her calls. I replied that I missed them. She said if I didn’t miss it, things would have been better. My mother had died one hour ago. If I had picked her call, I would have gone to the hospital and would have donated blood to my mum.
I didn’t react, I just entered my car and I drove away from that area. I went straight to my girlfriend’s place. I was driving recklessly and I was giving devilish laughs. I got to my girlfriend’s place, ignored the greetings of her gateman and I went inside the house. When she saw me, she smiled at me, went on her knees and told me she was sorry. “You killed my mother.” That was all I said and then I pounced on her and started beating her. She was shouting and telling me she was innocent. I was beating her and I was thinking of no other thing but beating her. I carried the flower vase that was near to me, and I smashed it on her head. Suddenly, I didn’t hear her sound again. “Pretender!” I shouted and I continued to beat her. When she was no longer moving, I stopped. And I discovered she was dead. I got up spitted on her body and left in anger. I didn’t greet the gateman when I was leaving. But he saw blood on my hand, and my shirt. He must have informed the police.
I was going home to kill myself. I was going home to go and drown myself inside the pool. I was happy I had killed my girlfriend and sad that my mummy had died. I was feeling this way when I discovered that the police were at my tail. I didn’t give in to them, but they gave me a hot chase and caught up with me. I got arrested and I appeared before the court. I wasn’t sentenced to death because my uncle was influential. But I am spending the rest of my life in jail.
I heard my mum came back to life few hours later. She died when she heard I was arrested by the police for killing my girlfriend. Am not sure if the story is true. But no matter what, anger has terminated my ambition and didn’t allow me enter the New Year as a free man, but as a man behind custody. Anger has made me stupid.
“Anger has overpowered him, and driven him to a revenge which was rather a stupid one, I must acknowledge, but anger makes us all stupid.” Johanna Spyri.

olufeltukor.wix.com/tukor