This is the first part of a story about how a political party known as the Radical Party Of Ipata State grew to become an irrepressible menace, and how the threat it posed was eventually neutralised.


INT TV NEWSROOM - EVENING

An African female PRESENTER on TV starts her
show. Sitting by her left is an African man (DON
JOSH) in a regal white suit with jerry-curled hair.

PRESENTER
Hello and welcome to the interview
segment of our show. Tonight we will be
speaking with Dr. Don Josh.

In case you live in a cave and don't
know him, he's the former university
lecturer who founded the Radical Party
of Ipapa State (also known as the RPIS)
seven years ago.

(to Don Josh)
How are you doing, sir?

DON JOSH
I'm fine.

PRESENTER
Can you tell us the mission of the the
Radical Party of Ipapa State?

DON JOSH
7 years ago, as a university lecturer, I
observed and was saddened by the apathy
of the youths in this state. So I asked
myself, "what is the problem?"

PRESENTER
What was the problem?

DON JOSH

I spoke to so many of my students,
trying to answer that question.

They could see corruption and wastage
everywhere -in the governorship, the
state assembly, the police force, and
even in their elders.

They could see that things were wrong,
and indeed they wished that things could
change, but because of the pervasiveness
of corruption in the society, they felt
helpless to fight for change.

So instead of fighting corruption, our
youths were embracing corruption in
large numbers. One statement I kept
hearing goes like this: "in an illegal
society, it is illegal to be legal"

PRESENTER
(amused)
Illegal to be legal?

DON JOSH
Yes. Imagine that!

But it wasn't funny at all.

PRESENTER
I'm sorry.

So you started the Radical Party to give
them faith in themselves?

DON JOSH
Yes, but not just that. I wanted to give
them faith in themselves, yes, but also
faith in the political system, faith in
their country, and faith in justice.

PRESENTER
Please explain.

DON JOSH
I asked myself, "why is our nation so
corrupt in the first place?" And the
answer came to me loud and clear: "it's
because evildoers are not punished
harshly enough".

PRESENTER
That's deep.

DON JOSH
(preaching on)
Every action a human being takes is
either good, or evil. It's either a
good deed or an evil deed.

If it's not good, it's evil. There is no
middle ground. If you're not a
do-gooder, you're an evildoer. I'm
being very sincere with you.

PRESENTER
Some people might not agree with this
notion of black and white morality.

Surely there are some actions that are
neither good nor evil, black or white.
Gray areas, as they say.

DON JOSH
There is no such thing!

Some people want us to believe that
their actions are neither here nor
there. Neither good nor black. Neither
black or white. But they are wrong.
Very wrong.

PRESENTER
But ,

DON JOSH
When you toss a coin in the air,
(tosses a coin)
It lands either on the head, or on the
tail. No gray area.

In Mathematics, every non-zero number is
either positive or negative. No gray
area.

In Chemistry, every reaction is either
endothermic or exothermic. No gray area.

In Biology, when a plant of animal stops
growing, it starts shrinking. No gray
area.

When people are trying to justify
what they call gray areas - evil deeds
like fornication, adultery, white lies,
abortion in rape cases, or homosexuality
- I just tell them to SHUT UP.

Because there is no gray area in
morality. If it's not good, it's evil.
If it's not right, it's wrong. Let us
be sincere.

PRESENTER
OK.

Let's go back to the story of what led
you to start the Radical Party.

DON JOSH
I asked myself, "what will happen if the
government starts punishing evildoers at
all levels in Ipata State?"

The fear of punishment will lead people
to do good instead of evil.

Those who insist on doing evil will be
locked away in prison where they can no
longer influence others. Ipapa state
will become a paradise on earth.

For this to happen, we need to have
honest lawmakers in the state assembly
to create laws against all forms of evil
in our society.

Many gray areas need to be made black
and white so citizens of Ipapa will know
what to do and what not to do.

We also need honest policemen and judges
who will execute these new laws without
mercy, fear or favor.

Knowing this, I decided to create a
political party to gather and groom
young people who will grow up to become
just and honest lawmakers, policemen,
and judges.

That's how I started the Radical Party.

PRESENTER
Wow.

DON JOSH
I know. I started out as a political
nobody with a dream, and see where we
are today: we're everywhere!

Do you want more of this story?

Seun,
This is more well composed and focused than even Mary Abraham and the previous fiction you have posted since I read your 'Skentele' President 2007: A Comic Strip.

In fact, you can begin and end it in the same scene.

Four stars out of five stars.

Seun are you writing this for the sake of writing or do you have any intensions with it.

hey seun i've got a suggestion, why don't you convert these your stories to short cartoons for the web or tv, am certain it will recive a lot of audience. If am free later this month i would try and work on this story. l8r

Seun:


Do you want more of this story?

I've learnt from experience that our responses does not influence your decision to continue or not. I only wonder why you bother to ask in the first place.

Are you really writing these stories because you have a genuine interest in story writing or just looking for reactions like mrmayor's?

I cant think what you've done with the others and the myriads of comments you got. I would strongly suggest you stick to what you do best, clearly writing does not seem to be it. sorry to be so blunt!

Seun are you writing this for the sake of writing or do you have any intensions with it.

I intend to produce a movie once I have a complete story that people really like.

why don't you convert these your stories to short cartoons for the web or tv

That was my intention but, alas, there is no profit in it. Without profit, one can't be focused.

I've learnt from experience that our responses does not influence your decision to continue or not.

That's not true because it's when your responses are negative that I lose the desire to continue. This is my first attempt at rewriting the Mary Abraham story which you guys did not like. I will not give up.

I would strongly suggest you stick to what you do best, clearly writing does not seem to be it.

In case you haven't noticed, forum moderation is also not what I do best, yet Nairaland is doing ok!

Nice story, really i enjoyed it, but to be honest i think it's kind of boring since it's a dialouge (two people blabbing) maybe you could spice it up with some humour (if you have that in your arsenal) or add flashbacks, but i loved it anyway, illegal to be legal, hmmm

Seun,
The greatest writers in the world did not study literature.

Just go and achieve it and God will increase you more.

Nairaland is already a success story and Iook forward to your 1,000,000th member one fine day not far away.

Seun, though am new in this forum
Those of us who grew up in traditional Christian churches will recognize these hymn titles and I think you'll enjoy this, although for those who grew up with other traditions, I recognize that they may not make much sense. These come from my friend, Dolly Howard, and I thought they were wonderful! Enjoy!


The Dentist's Hymn:, Crown Him With Many Crowns
The Weatherman's Hymn, There Shall Be Showers of Blessing
The Contractor's Hymn, The Church's One Foundation
The Tailor's Hymn, Holy, Holy, Holy
The Golfer's Hymn, There is A Green Hill Far Away
The Politician's Hymn, Standing on the Promises
The Optometrist's Hymn, Open My Eyes That I Might See
The IRS Agent's Hymn, I Surrender All
The Gossip's Hymn, Pass It On
The Electrician's Hymn, Send the Light
The Shopper's Hymn, Sweet By and By
The Pilot's Hymn, I'll Fly Away
The Paramedic's Hymn, Revive Us Again
The Judge's Hymn, Almost Persuaded
The Psychiatrist's Hymn, Just A Little Talk With Jesus
The Postal Worker's Hymn, So Send I You
The Waiter's Hymn, Fill My Cup, Lord
The Gardener's Hymn, Lo, How A Rose E'er Blooming
The Lifeguard's Hymn, Rescue the Perishing
The Criminal's Hymn, Search Me, O God
The Baker's Hymn, When the Roll Is Called Up Yonder
The Shoe Repairer's Hymn, It Is Well With My Soul
The Travel Agent's Hymn, Anywhere With Jesus
The Geologist's Hymn, Rock of Ages
The Hematologist's Hymn, Are You Washed in the Blood?
The Menswear Clerk's Hymn, Blest Be the Tie

The Umpire's Hymn, I Need No Other Argument
The Librarian's Hymn, Whispering Hope

And as a reminder to the speeders in the crowd:

45 mph, God Will Take Care of You
55mph, Guide Me, O Thou Great Jehovah
65mph, Nearer My God to Thee
75mph, Nearer Still Nearer
85 mph, This World Is Not My Home
95mph, Lord, I'm Coming Home
Over 100mph, Precious Memories

pls, help me,

seun, please, help me, im trying to connect to my laptop via gprs. modem used is the k700i. when my connection is authenticated, the connection status only sends data without recieving. i dont know if its the network im using celtel.

i have to say i'm really impressed by your organisation of your script for the first time it's not just bullet pointed or looking like quick jotted down notes.

Seun:

I intend to produce a movie once I have a complete story that people really like.

That was my intention but, alas, there is no profit in it. Without profit, one can't be focused.

First of all hun, i really do think you should stop asking for our opinions on your stories cause like i once said every film has an audience. Some like romance, others action and many politics. You can't base our opinions of your story on the potential audience who could be giving a chance to watch it and like it.
I mean, i thought there was too much rambling about black white and gray and the examples you gave were just a little too many. I realised that after i had finished reading i still hadn't got the idea of what had started the radical party (i probabaly skipped past it)
I also think you do place to much on the money or profit you intend to make out of something. You have to realise that you need passion to be able to carry out something, if you keep on thinking about how much you are going to make you are not going to be able to carry things to their full potential casue after you realise that somethings don't yield much you'll just drop it in search for the next moneymaker and thats not how things should be.

Thanks for the advice, Damsal. Thanks for the review, Damsal.

Quote from: Seun on October 05, 2006, 06:14 PM
I intend to produce a movie once I have a complete story that people really like.

That was my intention but, alas, there is no profit in it. Without profit, one can't be focused.


is money your motivation for all things you do?
Creatives produce art for the love of the art, that should be your starting point.
Yes everyone loves to get paid
Yes everyone needs to put bread on the table
Love the art for the art, passion is wot leads to a sence of accomplishment and a good movie.

Dont look @ the profit but fulfill a dream

When I was in school, I was considered an "all-rounder". I have so many dreams I wish to accomplish. If I focus on any particular dream, such as movie-making, then I won't be able to pursue others unless the one I pursue generates money. If project A succeeds and makes money, then I can use that as capital for project B. That's sustainable.

Seun:

When I was in school, I was considered an "all-rounder". I have so many dreams I wish to accomplish. If I focus on any particular dream, such as movie-making, then I won't be able to pursue others unless the one I pursue generates money. If project A succeeds and makes money, then I can use that as capital for project B. That's sustainable.

all of us were all-rounders in school however those who achieve the most are those who set goals and put all their efforts to achieving that one goal.
For as long as pursuing money is the motive for everything you do it is hard to imagine you succeeding at anyone of your many pet projects. Choose one and do the best you can.

I love music, i write novels too but my passion from day has been to pursue a career in science. All others i consider as hobbies and that mindset has served me well till today.

Hmmm. Thanks for the advice. So what are your achievements so far in your area of focus - science?

Seun:

Hmmm. Thanks for the advice. So what are your achievements so far in your area of focus - science?

wait and see.

Hello Seun, i must confess dat i really love this story u are proposing here. It's really fantastic and especially being a student of Political Science in d University (although i ve my career in movie production), i ve a lot of interest in dis particular story and i'll be 100% available to help in developing d story especially 2 conform 2 d every day happenings in our politics in dis nation. Just as Raymand has said, dere shuld also be atleast a little bit of humour in d above scene u ve written.

As a Political Scientist, i also plan 2 work on political oriented stories 2 help correct political problems we re xperience in dis nation

Thanks, Tosbi.  Check out what I'm currently up to.  I mailed you yesterday; did you get it?

Ok. I haven't checked my mail yet but i will do now. Tanks

Moved to the new "share your work" forum.

i think i love the script, and your fighting spirit, but always put at the back of ur mind that there is room for improvement>>>>>>>>>>>>>