Yet again, another cold morning
Stretched hard and managed yawning
I was ready; for I've planned before today
To leave the slums already; if I didn't fail

Packed not bags
Just a short and a rag
They've been with me
Even before I became dark

Maybe I was selfish
Wanted a life for my sisters and mummy
But not here in the slums
All they do is nothing but dirty and fetish


It's two days
I've been walking and swearing
Couldn't pray? Yeah
Couldn't find my faith nor bearings


It is darker
The night, voraciously feeding on its victims
Was I mad? Was it hunger?
Or maybe I wasn't thinking
Should I retreat and forget 'The City'? 


Thoughts came through, on and into my mind
But it couldn't be water nor food
Soon I'll go empty and dry, then die...
To or fro; either ways, 'twas mine to decide.

So I pushed a little further
Through lakes that conceived not waters
Into caves which were rocky freezers
Couldn't sleep - once sweet-dreams became bitter

With quivering knees
I went up there
Colourful skies, shadowed City;
Both, still not near
Could have gone for it
But my breath was leaving me
Was not to blame death for helping me
Then I found faith; I prayed
A promise of blessings
All for my family
When I get home...

¤



Llaykorn donifez JigsawKillah Pdizzle Bolakale40 emaculate99 GidiQuotes Yuzjet Mo*gan

colourful skies; shadowed city....

I loved these lines especially. Is the bolded supposed to be knees?


The night, voraciously feeding on its victims

Through lakes that conceived not waters

Into caves which were rocky freezers


With quivering kneels
I went up there
Colourful skies, shadowed City;
Both, still not near
Could have gone for it
But my breath was leaving me
Was not to blame death for helping me
Then I found faith; I prayed
A promise of blessings
All for my family

texanomaly:
I loved these lines especially. Is the bolded supposed to be knees?


The night, voraciously feeding on its victims

Through lakes that conceived not waters

Into caves which were rocky freezers


With quivering kneels
I went up there
Colourful skies, shadowed City;
Both, still not near
Could have gone for it
But my breath was leaving me
Was not to blame death for helping me
Then I found faith; I prayed
A promise of blessings
All for my family

Oh! thanks ma'am

¤

I like this...that before you became dark line is impressive.

Yet again, another cold morning
Stretched hard and managed yawning
I was ready; for I've planned before today
To leave the slums already; if I didn't fail


This writer was prepared to leave home and look for better life .he had prepared for the next day finally the day had arrived, the feeling or mood of the writter is happy because the long expected days came.



Packed not bags
Just a short and a rag
They've been with me
Even before I became dark


He don't need much things just few things he own already short and rag
[color=#990000]The last line hereI think you made mistake

Even before it became dark as in night
.[/color]

Maybe I was selfish
Wanted a life for my sisters and mummy
But not here in the slums
All they do is nothing but dirty and fetish

He has hoped for good life for his family that's why he had to leave to get a better life for them.



It's two days
I've been walking and swearing
Couldn't pray? Yeah
Couldn't find my faith nor bearings

[color=#000099]The journey has obviously began .the mood of the writer change here to being sad ...regret is quietly setting in ,he get to point he could not found his Faith to pray[/color].


It is darker
The night, voraciously feeding on its victims
Was I mad? Was it hunger?
Or maybe I wasn't thinking
Should I retreat and forget 'The City'? 

In this part uses personification, (the art of describing non living things ,object with living things features for example the night voraciously = eagerly or devour.the night can't feed it has no mouth or teeth)it a way of saying the night is waiting for him to die I think now he is thinking of retreat which is going back home swearing and pharphs no more food.one the is regret is there

Thoughts came through, on and into my mind
But it couldn't be water nor food
Soon I'll go empty and dry, then die...
To or fro; either ways, 'twas mine to decide.


He thought of what he has left with him ,soon they become empty then he dies ..now he is thinking seriously to go home or still ahead

So I pushed a little further
Through lakes that conceived not waters
Into caves which were rocky freezers
Couldn't sleep - once sweet-dreams became bitter

with the strenght he went ahead with hopes ,he found a place and rest in cave which he found but could not sleep there it was drawn on him all his plans to have a good life by going to the city had failed . That's also personification dream cannot taste anything .dreams have no tongue to taste

With quivering knees
I went up there
Colourful skies, shadowed City;
Both, still not near
Could have gone for it
But my breath was leaving me
Was not to blame death for helping me
Then I found faith; I prayed
A promise of blessings
All for my family
When I get home

He became cold ...he thought of the city he wanted to go though still not near him..he was dieing slowly is breath was leaving (once breath lives ones life it death .)he prayed .......he also thought proving for them or blessing them and making them happy once he get home (home there is not his real house were he left from he was indirectly saying when he get to hell ,heaven or dies finally .)


I hope my explanation is correct according to understanding ......it same thing with our youth of these day going to lybia and crossing to Italy.going to Europe by foot .frist they wanted to make their family happy but during the journey death can also set in.

It not all that leaves home get to their destination it only few that makes it.


I like the poem and the lessons it teaches.

[quote author=merit12][/quote]
Nice analysis. But,


Packed not bags
Just a short and a rag
They've been with me
Even before I became dark

That's was not a mistake though. When babies are born, they are born mostly with light/fair skins; and when they grow older, they grow darker. He's trying to stress the fact that;
* He has nothing else (his poor state)
* These clothes were childhood gifts
* The short and rag is as old as himself
..................................................

So I pushed a little further
Through lakes that conceived not waters
Into caves which were rocky freezers
Couldn't sleep - once sweet-dreams became bitter

While still with his family, he must (at some point) be fantasizing on how "the City" would favour him. He had hopes - those were his sweet dreams. But when reality struck, his dreams which were then - sweet; wasn't anymore.


Thanks

Qaisar1:

Nice analysis. But,


Packed not bags
Just a short and a rag
They've been with me
Even before I became dark

That's was not a mistake though. When babies are born, they are born mostly with light/fair skins; and when they grow older, they grow darker. He's trying to stress the fact that;
* He has nothing else (his poor state)
* These clothes were childhood gifts
* The short and rag is as old as himself
..................................................

So I pushed a little further
Through lakes that conceived not waters
Into caves which were rocky freezers
Couldn't sleep - once sweet-dreams became bitter

While still with his family, he must (at some point) be fantasizing on how "the City" would favour him. He had hopes - those were his sweet dreams. But when reality struck, his dreams which were then - sweet; wasn't anymore.




Thanks

I hoped my explanation was correct to some extend?

merit12:


I hoped my explanation was correct to some extend?

Yeah Sure.