10/24/2006 12.00pm

Fellow Nigerians,

In the face of recent developments in Ekiti state, it has become expedient for me to issue this press statement to explain my alleged complicity in the unbridled looting of the Ekiti state treasury by Ex-Governor Ayodele Fayose.
You will recall that a few months ago, one certain Alamieseigha attributed his “miraculous escape” from British justice to me. Let me state emphatically that I have never met the said Alams, I do not know him and thus could not have been involved in his attempt to turn the state treasury into his private bank account.

It has also been brought to my knowledge that a certain Fayose did issue a statement and I quote "I want (those plotting to remove me) to know that the God I serve would definitely put them to shame because their gathering is not of God and it would be scattered."   However, on checking our records, we can state categorically that no one by the name of Ayodele Fayose exists on our service roll. We indeed are doing our very best to rid our force of ghost servants.  I do not know the said Fayose and no such gathering has been bought to my notice. We also have it on record that the said Fayose tried to portray his alleged persecution in the same light as that suffered by my favorite son Joseph in the hands of Potiphar. I hereby declare that I have no knowledge of his purported persecution neither did I give him a coat of many colours. I did not send any dreams to him neither is he imbued with the gift of interpreting dreams!

The said Fayose also states correctly that I have a purpose for everything, while I acknowledge that as true, I hereby declare that  his recent travails have nothing to do with any purpose of mine regarding his being caught with his hands In the cookie jar!
Let it be known that anyone who fought the said Fayose did not fight me as he claims but was fighting him and his father the devil.

Let me also state that not all those who quote bible verses are my servants. Even their father the devil can quote the bible flawlessly. As for those who are endlessly "waiting on me" before deciding to foist themselves illegally on the masses for another unconstitutional term in office, i hereby state categorically that i do not know them, I refuse to continue to be used as a political houseboy by mischievous politicians attempting to use my name to legitimise their continued assault on the Nigerian masses.

Signed
Gabriel

On Behalf of HIS EXCELLENCY
I AM THAT I AM!