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E Ma Se Yonu By Pius Adesanmi by segalex: 3:59pm On Mar 09, 2016 |
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s the last born and only son of Alfred Dare
Adesanmi and Lois Olufunke Adesanmi, I only
narrowly escaped becoming a woman wrapper in
my formative years. Had Baba Adesanmi had the
Okonkwo inclination, he would have been extremely worried
about my propensity to cling to Mama Adesanmi’s
wrapper.
Many of you who will read this essay will know Olajumoke
the bread seller, your pastor, and the politician you can
defend with your life while he robs your future. It is unlikely,
however, that you have ever heard of Chinua Achebe or
Things Fall Apart. That politician you are defending has
destroyed the education system that would have taught you
about Chinua Achebe. Okonkwo is the hero of Things Fall
Apart, a famous novel written by the man called Chinua
Achebe. In that novel, Okonkwo is worried about his son,
Nwoye, who is clinging too much to his mother’s stories.
That is why I said above that Baba Adesanmi would have
been worried about me if he had Okonkwo’s temperament.
But Baba Adesanmi was not like Okonkwo. So I got to cling
to Mama Adesanmi’s wrapper while growing up. In Isanlu,
Kabba, and Egbe, the three Okun towns where I spent my
entire childhood, Mama Adesanmi’s daily routine in the
evening consisted of social visits to friends, extended
family, and extended extended family. Sometimes she
drove and sometimes she went around neighbourhoods on
foot.
On days that Mama Adesanmi did not drive, you would find
me clinging to her wrapper with my left hand as we trudged
the streets, stopping to greet every passerby. “E wokun Iya
Iyabo.” Then the passerby would turn to me, pat me on the
head, and say: “Bola omo mama e!” Then there will be the
usual comment about me always clinging to Iya Iyabo’s
wrapper. Mama Adesanmi’s first child, my elder sister, is
Iyabo. Hence in Isanlu, Mama Adesanmi is Iya Iyabo to
everybody. As for me, if you call me Pius, those who come
from the first fifteen years of my life are usually lost. They
know Bola, not Pius.
Bola clung to Iya Iyabo’s wrapper till he was nearly twelve
years old. Everywhere we went, there was the usual gesture
of communal giving and honoring. Iya Onireke will say,
“Bola my son, take this sugarcane and be a good boy”; Iya
Olosan will say, “Bola my son, take this orange and be a
good boy”; Iya Onikuli will say, “Bola my son, take these
kulikuli and be a good boy o; Iya Onidonkwa will say, “Bola
my son, take this donkwa and be a good boy”; Iya Elepa will
say, “Bola my son, take these groundnuts and be a good
boy”; Iya Eleja will say, “Bola my son, take this dried fish
and be a good boy”.
Giving a child clinging to his mother these kinds of gifts
devolves from a very complex cultural architecture. The
transaction is a gesture of “aponle” and “ayesi” (honour and
respect) for the parent of the child. It would be sacrilegious
for the child to accept the gift without first looking at his
mother’s eyes and facial expressions for visual gestures of
approval or disapproval. I would collect these gifts after
ascertaining that a flicker of approval had crept into Iya
Iyabo’s eyes. Then I would stand aside as Iya Iyabo would
spend the next thirty minutes thanking the giver in an
eternally-repeated cycle of “thank you”, “don’t mention”, “e
seun ma” “haba, Iya Iyabo, ko t’ope. Omo mi daadaa ni
Bola”.
There are days when the gift was monetary and this is
where things got complex. Often, all the listed women
would add one kobo, five kobo, or ten kobo to the gift.
Mama Adesanmi would never allow me to collect money
from these elderly women. I later came to determine that
she allowed me to collect monetary gifts from only people
in her own social and economic bracket or above: nurses,
teachers, doctors, etc. One day I asked why there was class
determination to who I could collect money from.
Her answer has remained with me for more than thirty
years. Whenever I allow you to collect monetary gifts from
somebody, it means I know that the person can afford it
and it will not cause him or his family any economic
difficulties. Many of these Iyas offering you money are
honouring your parents. They really cannot afford the
money they are offering you. In our culture, you are not
expected to collect such gifts.
You recognize the gesture and their pure hearts. Iya alakara
can afford to give you akara but she cannot afford to give
you money. If she offers you money, she is just honouring
your parents. That is why I always answer for you: “mama
e ma se yonu”. What you do not know is that whenever
your father hears that such poor women offered you
money, he often returns to give them monetary gifts and
receive prayers from them. Knowing when to say “e ma se
yonu” when offered a gift is very important in our culture.
At about the time I was being taught the cultural
significance of “e ma se yonu” in Isanlu, somebody was
receiving the same lessons in a town called Ilaro in Ogun
state. That person’s name is Femi Adesina, the man
currently mismanaging President Buhari’s media machine –
or mismanaging whatever it is that President Buhari isn’t
mismanaging and wrecking all by himself.
Thus it was that at about the time President Buhari
demonstrated his irredeemable blindness to symbolism by
haughtily claiming that his kids are abroad because he can
afford forex, my Nigerian of the year, a poor pensioner with
a heart of gold, was busy donating her pension to help
President Buhari fight corruption. I am fully in support of
President Buhari’s anti-corruption war. I have always
written that the bellyachers and badmouthers of that war –
caterwaulers of President Jonathan’s edifice of corruption
– should be ignored. I still maintain that point.
However, when Femi Adesina, a Yoruba man who grew up
in the cultural world of “e ma se yonu”, runs gleefully to his
Facebook page to announce the donation of a pensioner’s
widow’s mite to his Oga’s anti-corruption effort, then you
know that there is nothing that political aides cannot
jettison in their erroneous belief that being marionettes for
their principals is superior to being loyal to Nigeria.
President Buhari had only just shown himself totally
unworthy of this pensioner’s donation. Femi Adesina ought
to have advised his Oga that the moment was tragically
inauspicious for the Buhari presidency to seek to display
such glorious symbolism and sacrifice for Nigeria on the
part of a citizen since the President had only just done the
exact opposite by showing himself incapable of symbolism
and sacrifice.
In essence, what the man who announced the donation so
gleefully on Facebook ought to have done is advise his Oga
about the philosophy of “e ma se yonu”. Besides, I am sure
that President Buhari does not have enough time on his
plate to worry about what Femi Adesina posts on his
Facebook and Twitter accounts. Whatever we see there is a
function of his own choice and judgement. Time and again,
Femi Adesina’s judgement turns out to be horrible.
All we need is to know about the great, patriotic gesture of
this pensioner. You then add her to the 2016 National
Honours List (alongside Dr. Stella Adadevoh). Then you
elevate that pensioner to the status of a national example in
civics, selflessness, patriotism, and sacrifice. But President
Buhari cannot do any of this because he is in a bind. He is
in no moral or ethical position to collect the gift of this
pensioner on behalf of Nigeria because a citizen has risen
up to make the sacrifice he has refused to make for
Nigeria. Out of lack, a pensioner gives up the little she has
to help Nigeria. Somebody who should be making the
biggest sacrifice for Nigeria was on Al Jazeera declaring
haughtily that he has enough forex to maintain his kids
abroad.
We know that. But the moment you become President, the
exigencies of symbolism is not about what you can afford.
If the President’s kids are in public schools in Nigeria, a lot
would change. Adamu Adamu would not be on an extended
siesta in the Ministry of Education for starters. He would
know that the President’s children are in his sector. He
would work his ass off to get things right.
That money cannot be accepted. The pensioner cannot
afford to give it to Nigeria. By the way, Nigeria has never
done right by pensioners. What must be done is to honour
her along the lines that I have suggested. But if I know
Nigeria, the next honours list could feature Dino Melaye,
Bukola Saraki, David Mark, and Godswill Apkabio. And they
will all have supporters singing na God win. http://saharareporters.com/2016/03/08/e-ma-se-yonu-pius-adesanmi |
Re: E Ma Se Yonu By Pius Adesanmi by thecardinal(m): 4:25pm On Mar 09, 2016 |
Re: E Ma Se Yonu By Pius Adesanmi by Nobody: 4:52pm On Mar 09, 2016 |
well written as usual. the president needs to know the importance of symbolism. I believe he should learn fast how to be diplomatic in his choice of words and the art of talking around troublesome points. journalists are all out to nail you and they get their media moment when you put your foot in your mouth. yet would it be fair to truncate the studies of the children of the first family abroad simply because their father now heads the government in Nigeria? I think not. I have said this earlier, the ministers seem to be supremely tired after the"vigorous" screening exercise at the senate that brought them in. they have all gone to sleep, well with the exception of the finance minister. he should light a fire under them all. |
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