Hello guys, please be patient with what i call an essay here lol but i wanted to give you as much info as possible to my knowledge.

Hello, my father died interstate in Nigeria 10 years ago. There are 3 of us children-wise, i am the last child/girl, the first is my sister, 2nd being my brother, our mother who was still legally married to my father before he passed still lives, though her and dad were long separated and living in separate countries before i turned 5 years old and i am 29 years old now. There is a foreign company renting a portion of my fathers land currently, which my aunt, who was my father's closest and direct older sister (6th and 7th born, yeah grandma was busy alright haha), liaised/secured shortly after my father's death.

There is major dispute right now where the renewal of the rental on the land just went by, my aunty negotiated a substantial amount with the company but my brother hired a friend of his who is a lawyer living him power of attorney and they put in a dispute to stop the company making a payout to my aunt, claiming her power as a trustee has ended and they should not make a payout to her but contact his lawyers as the only son and heir.

Now the company is making a payout to no one until either of 2 things, everyone who stands to gain is in agreement as my brother threatened to sue if they make the payout to my aunt because my auntie assigned herself 10% for her work (she is a lawyer), my brother thinks she should only get 5%. The other condition is presenting a letter of administration or a probate. Now my brother does not have the right paperwork to put in an application for letter of administration and we all cannot come to an agreement on how the money the estate will receive is to be shared out.

My brother expects to get more money than myself and my sister(initially he had tried to see if he could get the whole funds paid only for himself on the DL but found he could not), he expects his lawyer to be paid 4% of the entire funds whereas he should be personally responsible for his lawyer's fee, not out of the whole fund. My brother has soon got my mother onboard because he has convinced her that he has her interest at heart, whereas mum being the spouse and top of inheritance hierarchy he needs to use her as pawn to get what he wants, he has never shown interest in her or helped here either. But us females are the ones who grew up with my mother mostly and she had more faith in us right up until this whole money issue came about, she would call me to come visit her with food or if she can come visit me, am a bit antisocial in that i have naturally kept to myself since i moved out of my mom's, due to reasons, but her and my sister are the closest and she asks my sister to do things like book her flights, pay her car insurance and so many other things, my sister pays regular visits to her and although she is not a cooker of African food like me, she will just take my mum to a restaurant of her choice to treat her. But since past few months that my brother has been working her head she is acting like my brother is her knight because he let her believe he plans to get control of the land and funds that is in limbo away from my aunt, who he knows she's not getting along with, they fell out before my dad died so it is not even about the current dispute.

This same son who while he lived with mom and began working for national express earning 1.5k monthly he refused to give her just £200 towards rent. He felt insulted that my mum would ask anything of him financially, and my mum only asked him because she makes 2k from here work, she is in her 50s, she will be retiring soon, she would like to work less, and £200 is half of what room rentals really are if he tried to rent one outside. He also gets to eat at home anyway and my mum buys and cooks that food. He decided to move out and rent outside because of mom's so called insult, this is after agreeing to pay the money and setting up the monthly payment to go from his bank account to my moms but cancelled it only after the first payment was transferred. She only noticed he cancelled it 3 months after and asked him about it and that is when he got mad and decided he is leaving that house.

Also, my mother herself does not have the paperwork to apply for the letter of administration, she was not there during my father's death as they were not together ofc so she never did get the death certificate) and don't think she can find her marriage cert either as her and my father married while pregnant with my sister who is the the oldest and turning 33 this year. But anyway she would not want to apply for it because of countless fees and the stress and hassle that the Nigerian system makes one go through just to acquire such things.

My father died in my aunt's husband's hospital, as my aunt had him taken from Abia State where he lived to her husband's hospital in a different state (need to find out as don't know State hospital is located in). Yes the very same aunt who is a trustee and liased the deal with the company renting a quarter of the land. Now another sad part is this my aunt and my mother are at odds and refuse to communicate, they almost had a showdown at my father's funeral, my mum told me, but my mom has a thing of telling major and obvious lies so i knew the story would be slightly different and i asked my sister, who confirmed a showdown but basically that aunt was ready to K.O mom, my aunt slapped mom because of something she found disrespectful that mom said to her and people had to hold and calm my aunt and remind her it was my dad's funeral so she needs to stick to respecting what the funeral was about. Mum claims aunt slapped her and she slapped and kicked back and warned my aunt to mind herself ... see i know my mom and i know my aunt, my mom could never physically take on my aunt (my aunt is a gladiator, my mum is like a kitten... when a kitten tells you they purposefully fought a gladiator and made a statement, one has to do a double take and check sources for confirmation

Now, my aunt is behind my sister and i because my brother did not want her to give us anything from the first payout when the rental with the company was agreed even though he was given over 50% of it by her, he asked her to give him ours so he can give to us, she said no, he should tell us to contact her directly for it (my brother was resides in Nigeria as he prefers it there, my sister and i reside in the UK). This is how brother 'dearest' came to be at odds with this aunty, so very different from why my aunt and mother are at odds.

So i ask the opinion of knows who are in the know, aka legal field, had same problem or had family go through same thing ...do you see anyway we may come to resolve this matter without the letter of administration? Or if somehow any of us manage to acquire the letter of administration may i ask who will be entitled to what, i am a bit unclear on some of the information i have researched.

I am only certain of the fact that if us children are entitled to anything then it will be shared equally as opposed to my brother thinking he can use that whole biased tradition the the first son gets all (or perhaps lion share). And how does Nigerian letter of administration in Nigeria dictate that the money/estate will be shared between my mother and the 3 of us children?

P.S. Not sure the State my father was declared dead in, we were not even told that he was ill and slowly passing until he passed ugh, the excuse "they were trying to protect my sister and i". But i am an Igbo origin and parents are from Anambra State.


Side story(some background story, might wanna skip this part):

Honestly this whole matter is so disheartening because my brother has received so much love and help form us despite us living apart from teenage years, we all grew up together with my father until i was 11 and my mum who is the one that gave us our British citizenship brought us to live with her here in the UK, felt like i was living with a stranger, as i said her and my dad separated when i was like 2 years old and we stayed with my dad until a certain age. My mum then sneakily shipped my bro back to Nigeria only a year after and my sister knew about it and followed my mums instructions, i was not told because i would have snitched to my brother then, only found out after the deed was done and i was not impressed with my mum, i thought we should have stayed together because we came together.

Anyway since the separation i didn't have much contact with my brother, but my mum kept contact, my sister did once in a while, me i was the baby and moody and missed everyone (my dads side of family) and everything but did not contact anyone because i was mad they sent me to live with my mum in the U.K. Honestly i had a fantastic life in Nigeria and was spoilt back home, coming to the UK is the worst thing that ever happened to me, seriously lol, there are benefits but i would have rather gone to live with my aunt in the U.S. or stayed back in Nigeria with my dad. So all you people that wanna live in the UK, whyyyyyy?

Anyway my mum and sis sent my brother money even though he didn't even need it because my dad was not lacking, the boy was too greedy. Honestly alot of people back home are emotional extortionists, when they have a better life than you do and but you live in the UK they think you're living large and ought to be giving them even if they are living very comfortably back home, it's crazy.

Anyway when my dad died and we were all informed here, i was 19 (and even more annoyed to hear my father passed), my mother and sister travelled, i could not and i was the only one who had not seen my father physically since i left Nigeria. There was too much drama at the funeral so probably it was all for the best i did not go. My mum and aunt nearly came to blows, my brother was messing around with girls left right and centre, my sister was not impressed with his behaviour, he would try to give her graphic details of his escapades and because the funeral was happening at the village where my dad was born, in his parents compound, the sleeping arrangements was tight and my sister had to share a room with my brother, he at one point asked her to sleep in the livingroom so he can have the room for the night with his conquest for the night, this was the eve before my father's funeral.

After everything, my mother gave my brother his passport, bought him a ticket to come back to the UK, he lived with her and i had already moved out of my mothers. She complained about him to no end, he illegally put himself in her insurance then caused a road offense and my mum was taken to court and fined and she did not give him away as the culprit but luckily for her she managed to prove she did not register the vehicle(my brothers car) herself with her insurance.

I didnt have much money then but i could get authentic electronic gadgets below half price, so i have got my brother many things free of charge for him. Phones, tablets, game consoles, etc. Even one of my cousins in Nigeria was getting married back home 4 years ago and i was telling this boy that i was going to go, he then decides he wants to come too, asked if i can pay for his flight, i agreed. At the airport this boy caused so much trouble that they almost banned both of us from travelling, then they said actually i haven't done anything so they will just ban only him, but the flight was too full so they put in a request for a different airline to take on my ticket. Now because i bought both tickets together the airline i was eventually going to travel with did not get the memo that only my ticket is transferred as they refused to transfer my brothers to ensure his ban. But when i went to speak to new airline, my bro wasn't there and i managed to get them into believing the transfer was for both tickets and then i had to call my brother back because he had left me to go back to the other airline (in a different terminal that needed a 10minutes train to reach) to start something because of the ban they put on him, which thankgod he didnt manage to get to do before called him on the phone because they had warned him that they would get him arrested if he didnt leave that terminal or if he came back because he was arguing and refused to leave the terminal when they had banned him. Now reason he got banned? He got mad at the airport staff who was trying to say sorry we couldnt travel on that flight because it is too full but there is a later flight with a different airline and also compensation for the inconvenience of switching our flights, now this compensation was worth half the value of the flight ticket and we were in no hurry to travel, the wedding was in over a week.

Honestly that is just the tip of the iceberg with my brother, you do so much for him and he tries to swindle his very own flesh and blood that always help, lavish and pamper him, am the youngest and the most my bother ever spent on me was to buy me a drink and he has had the opportunity to do much more, plenty of times but doesn't, but he gives his friends plenty, but its more of a show off thing, he wants to look like a big boy who is rolling. I just tire of being related to him *sighs*

As for my mom and aunt, my dad's side of the family are big on gratitude and recognition, everyone has a level of ego, unfortunately (or not), my dads side of the family have a huge one. Which means if they do shit for u, u better tell everyone they did that for you and you better show how much u appreciate what they did for you or boy, you might wish they never did nada for you lol. So my parents split because my mom had to run away from the marriage as my dad was physically abusive like it was intense from stories i heard from my sister as she remembers what she saw him to to my mum at the age of 5 and 6, my mum had a miscarriage and all sorts and had to deal with mistresses that were moved in and bullied my mom and stuff. She married him when she was 19 and he was 29. She was naive and gullible, in some ways she still is (this thing with my brother is typical example why), she wasn't allowed to go out and the shopping list was controlled by the mistress that moved in who was a matron at my father's hospital, she was not permitted to wear makeup. It was a madhouse, he would beat and strip her infront of anyone and everyone and guess what the irony is, this very same aunt who my mom is at odds with was one of my moms closest confidant outside my mums sisters. And because this sister was closest to my dad, she was the one who could come by and tell off my dad stuff. Now a mutual story from both my aunt and mom is that my aunt used to come down from where she lived in a different state to tell off my dad and try n try to talk sense into him and told my dad he is giving my mum makeup to wear if she wants to and my dad needs to let her be free because even maids get treated better than that, and my aunt would manage to calm my dads ways for a bit but ofcourse eventually he went back to a walking volcano on my mom. And after my mom ran away and came to the UK, she used a fake identity to enter here because she was scared and did not have a British passport and eventually immigration caught up to her and she couldn't prove she was the fake identity so she then tried to say who she really was but she couldn't prove that either because she did not have documentation to prove herself and she was looking looking pretty guilty having entered the country with fake identity. She was imprisoned some time while there was a long ass process to prove who she said she was, they had to go take a blood test from her sister living in Nigeria and also came to my dad's house to take my sister's blood too as she claimed she had children and ofcourse they did not believe that either. Anyway eventually she proved who she was and fact she was born in scotland and who her parents, siblings and children were, then they pardoned her for entering the UK illegally, they believed her story of fear of marital husband and all that.

Now as my mum settled in the UK, all 3 of us siblings were sent to different aunts for some years so i lived with aunt in Kaduna and went nursery there, i learnt how to speak Hausa and also my English improved, who knew Hausa people spoke better quality of English than the one i learnt while in the Igbo side lol. But after a few years we all returned back to my dad and he moved in a house maid from god knows where, we went through a few number of maids i cannot remember how many now. And this aunt who securing deals on my dads land, that was also my mum's confidant back in the day, is very same aunt that my sister went to live with during the time we were sent to different aunties. And there was a time infact my bro lived with her for a while too.

But my bro is a natural born trouble maker so he was disciplined often as he misbehaved alot. So basically what i am getting at is that my aunt feels she was there for my mom like a hell of alot against her sibling for starters, then also raising her kids at some point while she *abandoned* them (as my aunt sees it that way) but i feel my mum had no choice but to run and there was noway my dad would ever let her take us with her then, she felt she would have died in that marriage and if what i have heard is true then i think my mom made the right choice to run off. But in doing so meant we grew up as what one may call somewhat dysfunctional and moved around the country more than the average family.

So i grew up knowing my dad and his side of the family and i was happy there, my aunts sort of filled up spot of me noticing too much that i was lacking a present mom you know and my mom does not like to hear me refer to them in the same regard as her. I have to accept mom is my biological mom and i feel really bad for her in regard of her marriage/life with my father but i emotionally and mentally i cannot help that i am closer to my aunts as i know and grew up with and around them from childhood and they were good to me, treated me like their own.

[center]hmmm[/center]

*sighs*

This is a handful. However, I'm here to also learn one or two things.
Lalasticlala, pls help dis chap by doing the needful

Sorry. I cut off reading when I read the part that you expect your brother to pay the lawyer personally. That's unfair. On a matter that would benefit you all as a family? Ofcourse the lawyer is entitled to a percentage. My time in practice has seen a lot of family turn enemies over properties. Too many to count. See how your brother is now a bad guy in your eyes. Suxh petty reasons....I pray you guys work it out before you become the Doherty family.. Everybody is suing everybody there. It is a mess.

On a legal note, your aunt must have been a recognized trustee for her to be collecting on the properties all these years. Does she have any papers? A existing trustee can appoint more trustee. You go to the lagos registry (if you are in Lagos) on the island to apply for letter of administration. I believe the death certificate is a public document? you are going to need it. They will educate you on the other necessary papers.

As for your brother wanting a lion share.. . There is no will, so the custom that your father followed in his life time will suffice. You are igbo. If it is the custom that the first son gets the father's house, then so it is. Customary laws are allowed so long as it is not repugnant to natural justice and fairness. But if it gets into a serious dispute, the judge will just revert everything to your mum since they are still legally ( court, I hope) Married.

Seriously, fighting over properties breed unnecessary animosity and hatred. It never ends. You did not need the properties before. You don't need to be involved in any fight siding your aunt over your brother and mother. You guys should fix things.
Excuse my typos. Did not proofread

your dad died without a will. All 3 kids are of age (above 18). Your dad was separated with your mother at the time of his death therefore she isnt entitled to anything

Your aunt is also not considered a suitable trustee in the sight of the law as there are 3 adult children surviving the deceased. therefore,

the company and/or any subsequent tenants in your fathers property will be mandated to pay the fees to a designated account. accessible by all 3 children.

All 3 are entitled to equal shares/profits from your dad's estate irrespective of whether there are male/female children.

So your brother isnt entitled to a lion share. Finally, i will suggest all 3 of you open a joint account with 3 signatories (x1 for each child), where monies can be paid to from your dad's estate. When the rent is paid, the legal fees will have to be paid from that account and whatever is left will be shared in 3 parts to all 3 children

AyeeIdris:
Sorry. I cut off reading when I read the part that you expect your brother to pay the lawyer personally. That's unfair. On a matter that would benefit you all as a family? Ofcourse the lawyer is entitled to a percentage. My time in practice has seen a lot of family turn enemies over properties. Too many to count. See how your brother is now a bad guy in your eyes. Suxh petty reasons....I pray you guys work it out before you become the Doherty family.. Everybody is suing everybody there. It is a mess.

On a legal note, your aunt must have been a recognized trustee for her to be collecting on the properties all these years. Does she have any papers? A existing trustee can appoint more trustee. You go to the lagos registry (if you are in Lagos) on the island to apply for letter of administration. I believe the death certificate is a public document? you are going to need it. They will educate you on the other necessary papers.

As for your brother wanting a lion share.. . There is no will, so the custom that your father followed in his life time will suffice. You are igbo. If it is the custom that the first son gets the father's house, then so it is. Customary laws are allowed so long as it is not repugnant to natural justice and fairness. But if it gets into a serious dispute, the judge will just revert everything to your mum since they are still legally ( court, I hope) Married.

Seriously, fighting over properties breed unnecessary animosity and hatred. It never ends. You did not need the properties before. You don't need to be involved in any fight siding your aunt over your brother and mother. You guys should fix things.
Excuse my typos. Did not proofread

i have since modified my post, feel free to have a look and please read further as I don't think you get the full story on my brothers motives. The lawyer is acting on my brother's behalf, not mine or my sisters, not my mom's from when i saw the paperwork the i have since also hired a lawyer, my brother was not supposed to hire a lawyer, he sprung this on us, he and his lawyers sent a document to the lawyers of the company renting the land where he claims to have appointed the lawyer to act on his behalf as the only son and heir, no mention on any of us females, to put in a hold on the payout of the funds to my aunt because he doesn't want my aunt to get 10% and he had hoped he could cash in on the entire funds but now has backed off a bit but wants to get more than we do. Before him and his personal lawyer contacted the company renting the land we all were under the impression and discussion the the money would be split 4 ways between us siblings and our mom, then he started disputing the 10% my aunt would be taking out for herself.

Then next thing you know it came to light from one of his closest of our cousins that he shares women with back home that he was looking for a way to get the money all for himself and he is looking into it to see if he can use 'law of the land' to claim everything. Plus there's some land our grand parents owned, some uncles sold 2 of them a few years ago, my bro was given my dads share seeing as my dad is deceased and he told us nothing of it and spent it all, this would have been part of my dads to share between us all. I told me sister about it but we decided to let it lie as it was not worth fighting about, around a mil Naira.
But this 68 mil Naira, some people do not earn that even in 10 years and i know the character of my brother so i know too well who i am dealing with.

From research and case studies i learnt that customary law often loses to the latter, and i do believe customary law only benefits the son right? From advice i have received on this, the main law that will rule this case is where the spouse gets a lion share, then children share the lower share equally. I don't know about death certificate being a public document seeing as not just anyone can get it.
Also my aunt is a trustee and she also appointed 2 other aunts as trustees

I think its best you come back to nigeria so that you can pursue this matter to a happy ending. Cos staying back in the U.k won't make much sense. Since your aunty seems to be in ur side, it's best you come down to nigeria amd team up with her.. You and ur sister. Also be careful with your brother, hope he's not too desperate?

Nna, I love reading but even the op has defeated me

This is damn long. i actually forgot what you needed advice on after reading this. writing must be your hobby!.

my take here is u all need to agree. till an agreement is sorted out, no movement.

Your brother is quite greedy. You all should get a lawyer that would ensure the money is shared equally, and also your aunt should get something from it too.

Warn your brother unless he may loose his life, a neighbor who went to his father's village to struggle for a piece of land with his uncle did not return alive. One must apply wisdom

@danielle2804- I appreciate your putting up the full details so you can get sound advice. I just thought to suggest that perhaps you can itemize the salient points so that potential helpers know exactly what area you need assistance.

For eg do you need a lawyer? Do you just want to know how customary law works? Do you want opinions on how the property should be shared?

On another note though I have seen families literally destroyed because of issues like this. I and one of my siblings have fallen out because of something related but not even this major. I want you to ask yourself is it worth it? How stable are you and your sister and mum financially? If you've coped without your dad's property so far are you sure you want to delve into fighting for it? Id hate a situation where violence and fetish practises become the order of the day over material items that we will leave behind when we die anyway!

Prayerfully make your decisions and I pray you overcome.

Your brother may seem like the victor if he inherits all today but will he enjoy it in peace? Who's to say he wont squander all in a few years given his current attitude and you will have the last laugh then?

My two cents!!!

Your brother is greedy and a spoilt brat.I guess he took after your father and having a dysfunctional(sorry) family also has an effect on him.
You're children of your dad too and deserve something substantial from that money.
You should come to Nigeria because that's the best way to sort things out.

You should all come to naija

Set up a trustee which will be sharing proceeds to all beneficiaries in an agreed percentage

Sorry for what mum went thru in abusive house

Your story is too long and I couldn't read more than half of it but I think is not a difficult case.
Below are tips to help u guys.

I'm not a lawyer but I think I can still advise because my own case made me know more about other cases.

In this case the basis is that your father died intestate oo.

Question: was your mother legally separated with your father?
If YES. Your mother is out of the equation. She will not partake in any thing belonging to your father.
If NO! she owns a big stack in the properties depending on the power of Attorney given to your father's sister by your father.
Your father most have given her sister Power of Attorney. You need to get a copy of it and ask a lawyer to interpret it for you. If it was written that your farhers sister to administrate, it gonna be big case to take it out from her. You guys have to sue that she deceived your father in putting it that way. She is ment to remit rents only.

Most important thing is to get letter of Adminstration. Who can get it?
Who ever has your father's death certificates.
Where do I apply for the letter of Adminstration?
I'm not sure if it will be in Nigeria or country where the properties are. But ask if it's possible to get it in country where the property is. For sure they will ask of the wife during its processing.
In my case my step brother tried doing it with his name he was forced to call my mother. He only succeeded in putting his name and mothers name. Luckily for us when it was begin prepared they put my mother's name first. This means alot. Now we my mother's children are out of the equation because our names aren't there The sharing is to be down by two of them. I'm only advising my mother I can't partake in the sharing.
Note: the properties will be shared to only those in the letter of Adminstration. Who ever his or her name appears first in it is the lead or will take first when shared. If it's only one person's name in it. The property belongs to that person only. Do not allow your brothers name only to be in it. All of you guys names should be included.

Info:
If you mother is to get the letter of Adminstration she should prepare it with her name only or all of your names including hers.

I see your brother trying to use your mother to prepare it with his name only. If he succeed in doing that then you all are out of the equation including your mother.

Forget that you guys are ibos. The property is not in ibo land nor Nigeria.
The government of UK where it is, is to share it for you guys not your town men oo in Nigeria. I'm sure your brother will want them come in because tradiction will favour him. No gree.

UK government will share it qually to all of you. If your mother was separated legally with your father. If not your mother will get half or one third of it and the remaining will be shared equally to you all.

Takecare