canuck:
[b]YAKUBU (Ya-ku-bu)
v. Ya*ku*bu, Ya*ku*bu*ed, Ya*ku*bus

1. To utterly squander once-in-a-lifetime opportunities, especially one that will cause pain to/mourning among millions of people

2. To mistake a platter of gold for a potty, and to go ahead and defecate all over it, while millions watch in distress, dread and disbelief

3. To be presented with an open door of success and to woefully fail to step in (Please see actual photo of this historically disappointing event)

4. To lack the zest, fervor, and drive to complete the easiest of tasks

5. To fail awfully at a very easy and uncomplicated assignment

(Etymology: Derived from Yakubu Aiyegbeni’s horribly missed opportunities during Nigeria’s lackluster performance against South Korea at the 2010 Soccer World Cup)

Usage:

"Mrs. Marriage Counselor, I am terribly pained! It was our wedding night! I was ready. . .But. . . But. . .He didn’t know what to do! I tried to help, but he Yakubu’ed!”

"All she needed to do was show up and the get the job that was waiting for her – Guess what? She Yakubu’ed the opportunity.”

Prayer: "Father, may I not Yakubu any door You open in my life in Jesus name!"

Example of the pain/mourning referenced in #1 above: “Yakubu! My unborn child won't forgive him” (Source: Acidosis)

Synonyms:

1. Waste foolishly
2. Fritter away
3. Dissipate casually
4. Lose effortlessly
5. Waste pipe (Source: chi-baby's papa!)


OTHER MEANINGS AND DERIVATIVES

YAKUBUOLOGY (Ya-ku-bu-o-lo-gy)
n. Ya*ku*bu*o*lo*gy

A situation where family demons travel long distance (no visa required) with a person, wait for that individual’s moment of glory, and strike that person with a persistent lack of common sense.
Usage: “That man Yakubus from time to time. That’s why nothing works for him!”


YAKUBU (Ya-ku-bu)
n. Ya*ku*bu, Ya*ku*bu*ed, Ya*ku*bus

Sociology: A situation where the ghastly performance of ONE individual triggers large-scale cases of hypertension, screaming, collasping, sighing, and sometimes, extended periods of loss of appetite among OTHER people in the society. Please note: The perpetuator remains perfectly healthy.


YAKUBU (Ya-ku-bu)
n. Ya*ku*bu, Ya*ku*bu*ed, Ya*ku*bus

When an individual or organization capitulates or fails to perform the least of its expected duties
Usage: "I'm pissed the bank is Yakubued; how am I supposed to get some money now?!"
(Source: OgidiBoy)


YAKUBOO (Ya-ku-boo)
n. v. interj. v.intr. Ya*ku*boo, Ya*ku*boo*ed, Ya*ku*booes

A deep-throated sounding expression of disdain, derision, or disrespect communicating instant disapproval of lackluster performance.
Usage: "Twenty minutes into the Super Chickens' poor performance, the deafening sound of 'Yabukuboo!' rented the air!!!"
(Source: btlasisi)


FATKUBU (Fat-ku-bu)
n. v. interj. v.intr. Fat*ku*bu, Fat*ku*bu*ed, Fat*ku*bues

To be so grossly overweight (usually between 40-60 lbs over) that the execution of simple tasks become herculean, arduous or strenuous.
Usage: "Doctor, help! I am so FATKUBU that I ran out of breath just shaking hands with you!!!"
(Source: Mcaudrey)



OTHER USES

"Afolabi is a Yakubu waiting to happen! Etuhu, Shittu, Ayila? All of them are Yakubus waiting to happen. Tragic!"
(Source: nearest)


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NOTE: Watch this space - This new word will be updated based on hilarious and thought-provoking contributions from NL in the service of all English-speaking countries!

Abeg, nor Yakubu this opportunity o!

Oche211:
I can never forget that heart-breaking moment. It's still as fresh as ever.