Hi, my name is Victor Anukam, am a prosthetist and i have worked with different people living with disability in Nigeria for many years.
I once said to a patient you know you are disabled? Then she said to me “Disabled is a generalisation, it doesn’t mean am incapable of doing anything, i don’t think so i feel that am very capable, i just have a part of my body that doesn’t work correctly” This really changed my perception of the word Disiabled, and caused me to ask questions and do alot of study about disABLED people, during my study i came across alot of disABLED people that have let anger take control of them, many where fighting depression daily and some spent many days trying to figure out what horrible thing, they must have done that require this punishment , the others felt loss and alone. After lots of questions asked, research done and experience sharing i decided to come up with the

STEPS TO ACCEPTING YOUR DISABILITY IN NIGERIA.

1. Accept that you are disabled and find a good listener.

Facing the reality that you have a lifelong disability is daunting. Until you accept that you have a problem, you will never take control of the problem. Only when you accept that you have a disability can you look to the future. If you hold on to the past, you will never move forward. To do this, you will need to seek out a good listener. Everyone will have all kinds of suggestions for you. They start emailing you stories of people who have much worse conditions then you. You don’t need to be constantly reminded that there were people worst off than you. All you will need is someone to listen to you on your terms. You will need someone you can talk everything through: from how you would manage the pain, how you would be a good father/mother, how you would be a useful husband/wife, how you would hold down a job, how you would remain active, and how I would find ways to feel good about yourself.

I suggest getting a therapist. They are professionals, and it is their job to listen and help. They are non-biased people, and nothing you say will be taken personally.

Accepting you are disabled doesn’t mean you are not capable. It is an understanding and acceptance that you have to make changes in the way that you do things. Without the acceptance of the reality of your situation, you won’t achieve the attitude necessary to move forward. Find someone to talk to that will listen to you on your terms.

2. Mourn the losses of what you no longer can do.

This is a tough, but also a necessary step. The reality is that there are things you just can’t do any more at all and things that you could no longer do the way you once did them. Instead of dwelling on what you could no longer do, you have to mourn the losses and focus on what you could do. You also need to focus on different ways of doing things.

Don’t dwell on what you can no longer do; it will prevent you from moving forward. Focus on what you can do and find ways to do new

3.Find the proper tool and accept them, Don’t let them define who you are

If your disability requires a device to enable you live a fuller life, then use it, for some it might be a clutch or a prosthesis, this will never be an easy thing to accept. No matter what anyone says or thinks being a bisbled in Nigeria and using a walking device carries a stigma. This can cause setbacks in how you feel about what others. It is important to forget about what others think and have confidence to use your device proudly. Finding the right device can help with this and purple prosthetics can help you find the right device.

4. Look for people who can inspire you.

You don’t need to look far to find people to inspire you. You can find these people in your own town, the Internet, the news, books, and stores. There are people living their lives with disability in Nigeria of all kinds. They push forward and accomplish things. They do it with such a positive attitude. You can searched out memoirs that some of these people wrote, and look up for videos that they had made. These people can become the force that might keep you moving forward.

Some of the people you might find most inspiring don’t necessarily have to be disabled like you. An alcoholic desperately trying to become sober, a father fighting cancer, a child trying to survive unthinkable abuse, and a man born with no limbs will inspire you to push forward, feel good about myself, and live a full life.

Look for people who inspire you, and let them teach you that anything is possible.

5. Allow yourself to be sad.

Suppressing you feelings will never allow you to heal emotionally. Learning to live with a disability in Nigeria is not easy. It is not possible to be happy all the time. Everyone who has been through adjusting to life with a disability will tell you about dark days. The key is to be able to pull yourself out. By giving yourself permission to be sad once in awhile, you will have the fuel needed for a positive attitude. If you suppress your sad feelings, they will be released in the wrong places and at the wrong times.

Give yourself permission to be sad. One sad day here and there will go a long way to having the right attitude.

6. Exercise regularly.

Exercise is not only beneficial to your physical health, it helps your mental health immensely. The hardest part might be finding exercise that you can do. The best way to do this is through your doctor or a physical therapist.
Working out can make using your prosthetic device or clucth a whole lot easier.
Find a way to exercise that works with your disability and push yourself. It will completely change how you feel about yourself.