I am gonna keep this short and straight to the point, Please just advice me and don't judge me.

I grew up in a conservative Xtian family, my father died while I was still young, but my mum single handedly put us all through college.
While I was a kid I was always fascinated with girls cloth and my mums wigs, so many times I would dress up in womens clothing, and was even called a girls name in my JS1.
But as I got older, I developed broader shoulders, grew tall and became quite mascular and acted less feminine, but something failed to change inside me, I am sexually attracted to men.
As a Chriatian raised up in a Conservative Catholic family, and having a mum in Charismatic, I have always subdued my sexual desire, but today I did something Inhave never done and I am ashamed and afraid...yet I felt good doing it.
At the Airport I got talking with this white American, who also turned out to be gay, one thing led to another and before I knew it, we were in the Bathroom of the airport kissing and caressing. He wanted to have MouthAction, but I stopped it, First because I am Christian, and Second because I am well aware of the possible sexual and even spiritual implications.
I feel so guilty right now, and I am even more afraid because as a Christian, I have seen first hand the Power of God in prayers.
I am afraid that God could reveal what I did in a vision to my mum, because God has revealed things in the past to my Mum about me which came to pass.
But I did not choose to be gay, I am 24 and this is the first time I have ever kissed someone, and it is a man...I am even more afraid of STDs, even tho I only kissed the man, but we kissed deeply until we were out of breadth...
I want to ask gay men in the house, who are Christians how they manage to subdue their sexual urges, because I am loosing it, and I know I serve a Jealous God...pls advise me.
MODs pls move this to the right section if it is not supposed to be here.

My brother, there's nothing like you just felt something in you what i do believe which is biblical is that if you're not pre-occupied with the Holy spirit and godly things there's no way such thing would have occured. Don't be deceived as i know some folks will come up here to tell you to make a choice, true its cool to make choice but what is the bases of your choice making? You should be more and more aware of the spiritual complications of be off-guard in this perilous times we are in as the society, politics and media have a such great influence on every of human free wills.

Solution: Go in to 3 days fasting and prayer with Ps 51 and 55 ask God for His forgiveness and cleansing, confess everything to him and pray with that bible verse am very sure God in His infinite mercy will cleanse you and give you a new heart and change of mind.

You can PM me if you wish to.

Shalom!

Thank you for your advise.
I feel like I have betrayed my God, God has been so Good to me, the only reason I am in California in the first place is because of God, God has been so faithful to me, He has lifted me up above my peers, and is using me to bless my family, My Mum is so proud of me, but she has no idea what I am struggling with...I just feel so afraid right now..
Do u also struggle with inordinate urges? How do you overcome them?

sobastical:
My brother, there's nothing like you just felt something in you what i do believe which is biblical is that if you're not pre-occupied with the Holy spirit and godly things there's no way such thing would have occured. Don't be deceived as i know some folks will come up here to tell you to make a choice, true its cool to make choice but what is the bases of your choice making? You should be more and more aware of the spiritual complications of be off-guard in this perilous times we are in as the society, politics and media have a such great influence on every of human free wills.

Solution: Go in to 3 days fasting and prayer with Ps 51 and 55 ask God for His forgiveness and cleansing, confess everything to him and pray with that bible verse am very sure God in His infinite mercy will cleanse you and give you a new heart and change of mind.

You can PM me if you wish to.

Shalom!

PureBlood:
Thank you for your advise.
I feel like I have betrayed my God, God has been so Good to me, the only reason I am in California in the first place is because of God, God has been so faithful to me, He has lifted me up above my peers, and is using me to bless my family, My Mum is so proud of me, but she has no idea what I am struggling with...I just feel so afraid right now..
Do u also struggle with inordinate urges? How do you overcome them?

I have given you the most precious key to solve that issue which the society hates so much. With God you don't struggle but you overcome. Get closer to God and accept Jesus as your Lord and personal savior or peradventure rededicate your life to Jesus

Biologically, there's nothing wrong with you. Thousands of animals, mammals, exhibit the same behaviour you do. Yet they have no knowledge if right and wrong.
*****
Just so you know. You are a normal human, you are not invalid in anyway. If your Christian beliefs want you to suppress it however, it's your choice. I believe the doctrine of Christianity says Christ's blood washes your sins away. Ask your ever merciful, forgiving god to forgive you for being normal.

PureBlood:
Thank you for your advise.
I feel like I have betrayed my God, God has been so Good to me, the only reason I am in California in the first place is because of God, God has been so faithful to me, He has lifted me up above my peers, and is using me to bless my family, My Mum is so proud of me, but she has no idea what I am struggling with...I just feel so afraid right now..
Do u also struggle with inordinate urges? How do you overcome them?

The first thing is to be courageous enough to forgive yourself.

Then, read Hebrew 4:16. And look up to your heavenly father without any guilt feeling based on sin. Pray for the forgiveness of sin and be determined in your heart not to fall into such temptation again.

Know that sin is first a nature before the thought of it and ultimately the act. Therefore, you have to work on yourself by prayer to uproot the seed of sin in your nature and pray for grace of God to avoid all temptations.

Finally, sensor your thought, friends, movement, tv programs and cinema etc. They can be a portal to reoccurrence of it. And never underestimate anyone to be in the service of satan against your life.

Remember, For this reason the son of God manifest to destroy the work of the devil.

Shalom.

Thank you so much.
I will be sure to take all your words of wisdom in my mind.
Stay Blessed!

waice6571:


The first thing is to be courageous enough to forgive yourself.

Then, read Hebrew 4:16. And look up to your heavenly father without any guilt feeling based on sin. Pray for the forgiveness of sin and be determined in your heart not to fall into such temptation again.

Know that sin is first a nature before the thought of it and ultimately the act. Therefore, you have to work on yourself by prayer to uproot the seed of sin in your nature and pray for grace of God to avoid all temptations.

Finally, sensor your thought, friends, movement, tv programs and cinema etc. They can be a portal to reoccurrence of it. And never underestimate anyone to be in the service of satan against your life.

Remember, For this reason the son of God manifest to destroy the work of the devil.

Shalom.