Hi everyone,This is my life story and i really need your advice because I'm really confused and don't know what to do right now, I grew up in a family of 5 me being the first born, about 13 years ago dad was working as a transporter and mum a trader, I was in primary school then life was rosy tho we ain't rich but our family was the envy of others as we lived fine, in short we had a happy home...Then suddenly the meek, caring man stopped coming home unlike before though he sometimes go a week not coming home due to the nature of his work... I could remember vividly mum had call for days asking when he'd come home but he'd keep posting is and giving excuses... Not long after that needs reached us that he has married a second wife... what?... His attitude changed and so everything life was difficult, being the first born I had little idea of everything that was happening, was 6 then...Mum left her trading business as it's proceed wasn't enough for her to feed 3mouths, we dropped out of the private school we was to a government school, I cried, I never wanted to attend a government school.. oh not now, I latest finished my primary school and soon gained admission into a sec school... Then I started loving with my uncle, It wasnt easy but I had no choice.... finished secondary school and seeking for admission.... all these years dad didn't care not even put a call through...He resides at Lagos and would only come home once a year whenever a particular festival like that is in town then he'd come to a shop where I help to sell to say "Hi"..Then leave till the next year of the festival.... Life was tough... Mum re-married 2 years ago... God knows I was mad as I knew nothing about the whole plan she only came home to check on me when I saw her with the pregnancy... did I tell you she relocated withy my other siblings ?.. Obviously, I understand, she had to...I always get emotional and jealous whenever I see my friends with their dad, the way they do, the way they talk a bout whatever new stuff he buy for them... Then I proceeded to getting his number from someone.... I'll call him ask about his work and all, you won't believe that dude ego boosted be sue of that and he'd call my mum and lash out vulgar word at her on phone... finally mum realized I do call and she barred me from doing so changed my SIM and all....I know the family is broken forever as both parties are married to different partners now.... Recently, I was informed by a bro that my dad claimed he's now a changed man and wants to settle the long term dispute bla bla bla which I ain't ready for right now... while he was away life has been fair on us and very soon I'm planning to travel out only waiting for my TRV to be approved by the embassy... we were happy without him really... I'm confused cox I've made up my mind not to forgive him until I become really successful to make him realize he made a huge mistake leaving us....

Mod please help move this to the permanent site cox I really need peoples advice... Forgive the typos I'm just a O'level holder

My dad was a stupid ass weasel, some said he married my mother with juju?!
I was bittered and wanted to change my name until I got enlightened.

I discovered;
1. Blaming is a lazy man's game, sh1t happens and blaming is the cheapest.
2. If i don't let go, I'd be worse than my dad
3. I am not my dad, I am ME, I'm unique- ima child of the Universe!
3. I'm the master of my destiny- I can choose the condition I want and I've got a fuckin lot to accomplsh than keepin a bs with a poor old man.

My friend, anger is like you holding a hot coal and expecting your dad to get burnt..
It's like drinking a poison and you expect the other person to die.

A wise man will changes his mind, it is only a fool that never changes his mind.
Just forgive and move on..
Anger is a negative energy and it creates a negative pathway in your brain which will inturn hinder your outer man' success.
Life is too short to be angry, let go.
#BeFree

I dont like ur moniker


Safe journey bro

OK the story line is devoid of alotta details .I don't even understand it ..but I think u want us to tell u something like u need to forgive yo father .OK you are an adult u know what to do .shikenan

As 4 me, e cn cum bak buh we won't b close

Only greetings and small small talks finish

Buh it's ur choice

Mockinbird:
Its like you holding a hot coal and expecting you dad to get burnt..
A wisde man changes his mind, a fool ever changes his.
Just forgive and move on..
Life is too short to be angry.

pls listen to him,anger is for the weak n wicked people.

To err is human, to forgive is divine.

Forgive him but don't be close to him. He failed woefully in his primary responsibly, he's not to be trusted.

Truth is, it's very hard but I will tell you this, forgive him, talk to him, but never involve him into your life for a while until you get settle. He might want to give you reasons for what he did and you might fall for it. So it's best you become a man before listening to what he has to say. Meet with him, tell him not to explain that you've forgiven him then move on, believe me fatherhood has a strong attachment to lost son, the closer for the both of you, the more you listen to his reasons for leaving his wife/your mum for someone else. Be wise bro

iluvkpetus
Bearing grudges is what weak people do but then, do not forgive because we are saying so but because you want to