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How To Be A Guest At A Nigerian Wedding - Events - Nairaland

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How To Be A Guest At A Nigerian Wedding by orinocopulse: 8:46am On Jan 21, 2017
If you’re like me, you’re right around that age in life (between 23 and 61) when most of your peers are getting married. Marriages mean weddings. . lots of marriages, lots of weddings. What to do, what to wear, what to say, how to act. . relax. Don’t panic. I’m here for you. To help you navigate these murky waters, I have put together a few tips, based on extensive research and years of experience, on how to be an ideal/model guest at a typical Nigerian wedding.
Warning: Do not try to adapt these survival techniques to weddings in other countries/cultures. If you want to give it a shot, I will not be held responsible for potential consequences including, but not limited to, funny stares/frowns, bodily harm while you’re being thrown out.

Never ever go early
First off, the church ceremony is optional. All that goes on there are the exchange of wedding vows and actual sealing of a marriage. Really unimportant stuff. But, if you really have some spare time on your hands and wouldn’t rather be at home getting some more sleep, catching up on some old TV reruns, then yeah you can go to the church ceremony. However, you must never get there on time. This is the single most important rule. Brides usually like to walk up and down the aisles of a near-empty church. Your smile of encouragement may put them off so you really are doing them a huge favour by staying away or getting there late.
Another reason you should not arrive on time is that this wedding is just as much about you as it is about the couple. You need to be the centre of attention and you can only be that when you get there late. So if the wedding invite says 9.00 a.m, taking into consideration dressing up, traffic etc, 10.00 a.m. would be a good time to get up from bed. But this is assuming you could be bothered about the church ceremony, because trust me it’s much better to go straight to the reception venue. That’s where all the real stuff happens anyway.

Fight for food
This is the real reason you’re at the wedding anyways. Party jollof rice. Clearly you were in a huge hurry to leave the house so you couldn’t have breakfast and now you are starving! So yell at the ushers/food servers when they pass by. Threaten, shine your eyes and raise your voice, not necessarily in that order. No, they shouldn’t serve food in an orderly manner, they should serve you first! You’re the star of the wedding remember?

Spray the money
Ah! Now, this is one ‘gift’ that you must not fail to give. But the interesting thing about this is that it’s really more to your benefit. Or how else are you going to show off your immense wealth if you don’t spray cash over the dancing sweaty couple? This is why you must not . . .

Enjoy the rest of the rest of the post here smiley wink

Re: How To Be A Guest At A Nigerian Wedding by SexyNairalander: 8:47am On Jan 21, 2017

This list is not complete op
Re: How To Be A Guest At A Nigerian Wedding by MrShine(m): 8:49am On Jan 21, 2017
this person booking space...ya not serious I swear....I'm sure u didn't even read what the OP posted grin
Re: How To Be A Guest At A Nigerian Wedding by JustOzito(f): 9:02am On Jan 21, 2017
grin. ba ca da fa ga ha ja ka ma na pa ra sa ta va wa ya za
Re: How To Be A Guest At A Nigerian Wedding by carzola(m): 9:08am On Jan 21, 2017
Spray it on...
Re: How To Be A Guest At A Nigerian Wedding by orinocopulse: 6:58pm On Jan 21, 2017

This list is not complete op

Haha Fair enough. The rest is in the full article sha but you goto anymore to add? smiley

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