A certain little girl, when asked her name, would reply, "Im Mr. Sugarbrowns daughter." Her mother told her this was wrong, she must say,"Im Janey Sugarbrown." The Vicar spoke to her in Sunday School, and said,"Arent you Mr. Sugarbrowns daughter?" With her mother standing just a few feet away, the little girl replied, "I thought I was, but Mommy says Im not."




A local priest and pastor stood by the side of the road holding up a sign that said, "The End is Near! Turn yourself around now before its too late!" They planned to hold up the sign to each passing car. "Leave us alone you religious nuts!" yelled the first driver as he sped by. From around the curve they heard a big splash. "Do you think," said one clergy to the other, "we should just put up a sign that says bridge out instead?"




A man was walking along a beach and stumbled across an old lamp. He picked it up, rubbed it and out popped a genie. The genie said "You released me from the lamp, blah blah blah.

This is the fourth time this month and Im getting a little sick of these wishes so you can forget about three. You only get one wish!" The man sat and thought about it for a while and said, "Ive always wanted to go to Hawaii but Im scared to fly and I get very seasick.

"Could you build me a bridge to Hawaii so I can drive over there to visit?"

The genie laughed and said, "Thats impossible! Think of the logistics of that! How would the supports ever reach the bottom of the Pacific? Think of how much concrete! How much steel! Youre going to have to think of another wish."

The man agreed, and tried to think of a really good wish. Finally, he said, "Ive been married and divorced four times. My w ives always said that I dont care and that Im insensitive. So, I wish that I could understand women. I want to know how they feel inside and what theyre thinking when they give me the silent treatment. I want to figure out why theyre crying, know what they really want when they say nothing, and know how to make them truly happy."

The genie paused for a while and said, "How many lanes do you want on that bridge?"




A husband was trying to prove to his wife that women talk more than men. He showed her a study which indicated that men use about 10,000 words per day, whereas women use 20,000 words per day. His wife thought about this for a while. She then told her husband that women use twice as many words as men because they have to repeat everything they say. Her husband looked stunned. He said "What?"




Brian was dating Lorraine and they were very close. While they were dating he met another woman named Clearly and wanted to start dating her but felt that he should be faithful to Lorraine. So he continued to date Lorraine. One day Brian took Lorraine on a walk in the woods by the river. As they were walking near the river Lorraine fell in and was washed away. Brian softly sang, "I can see Clearly now, Lorraine has gone, "

Were is the joke?

he see's no obstacles in his way,

Nigerian policeman arrested a man for urinating in a public place marked, 'DO NOT URINATE HERE. PENALTY IS #500.' The offender duly produced a #1000 note and asked for change. Policeman replied 'urinate again o, I no get change.'

Godmother:
Nigerian policeman arrested a man for urinating in a public place marked, 'DO NOT URINATE HERE. PENALTY IS #500.' The offender duly produced a #1000 note and asked for change. Policeman replied 'urinate again o, I no get change.'

Girls will never change.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1uQugVgsQpI