o soulmates really exist or are they just myths that have been brought about by Disney movies and kisses that lead to happily ever afters? You know, that someone that you connect with the instant you meet, kinda something like love at first sight, the one person created for you.

I’m such a sucker for love that this idea of a soulmate should be appealing. But wait fes. I have questions.

What if my soulmate is in another continent? What if he’s in a seminary? What if somewhere along the line he makes the decision to finally come into the body he has always felt like a la’ Caitlyn Jenner. What if the person was a stillborn or died in an accident before we had a chance to meet? Most importantly, what if we never get to meet?

The idea of ‘The One” I’m sure came from the bible account of the creation of Eve (romantic stuff) and we would all like to think there is a man out there whose ribs we’re carrying. But still…

Personally though, I don’t think there is the one, there are people you dislike on first sight just as there are people you love without ever having spoken to them. Besides, nobody can honestly say in all their years on earth, only one person has met them halfway in every way.

Case in Point 1: Myself of course.

There was this guy that I connected with like that , he was amazing. If I asked him to jump, he’d ask how high, he knew how to give me attention while letting me be at the same time. He knew how to cope with The Difficulties in being with me. To my friends, he was the one. To him, he was the one. I was the only one that didn’t get the revelation, maybe because I don’t believe in the idea of soulmates. Anyhow, it was easy (was it?) for me to leave when he started behaving like this like that.

Case in Point 2: My friend *Irene

She meets someone today, he’s tall, handsome and rich. He’s the one. She meets someone next week, he buys her that perfume she has always wanted .That other guy is becoming annoying, this one is the one. And so the cycle continues.

The idea of a soulmate is as romantic as it gets but I don’t think any other person on this planet was created for you and the success of relationships isn’t dependent on looking at partners through rose coloured glasses as soulmates. Love is a choice, no one is going to be perfect for you, you just have to find someone whose imperfections you’re willing to live with. Other people do not belong to you, especially not for you to fantasize and build them up in your mind as something they are not and will never become. Relationships are based on choice, communication, understanding , compassion, tolerance and love. All these you can have with anyone you choose to.



Do you believe in soulmates? Have you found yours? How do/did you identify yours?
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