Is English really stupid or the people that invented the language

Let's face it: English is a stupid language.
There is no egg in the eggplant, no ham in the hamburger, and neither Pine nor apple in the pineapple.
English muffins were not invented in England; French fries were not invented in France.

We sometimes take English for granted. But if we examine its paradoxes we find that Quicksand takes you down slowly, boxing rings are square and guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.

If writers write, how come fingers don't fing?
If the plural of tooth is teeth, shouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth.
If the teacher taught, why didn't the preacher praught.
If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what the heck does a humanitarian eat?
Why do people recite at a play yet play at a recital?
Why do people Park on driveways and drive on parkways.

You have to marvel at the unique lunacy of a language where a house can burn up as it burns down and in which you fill in a form by filling it out. And a bell is only heard once it goes!

People, not computers, invented English and it reflects the creativity of the human race (which of course isn't a race at all). That is why when the stars are out they are visible, but when the lights are out they are invisible.
And why is it that when I wind up my watch it starts but when I wind up this story it ends?

And there's more,

Do infants enjoy infancy as much as adults enjoy adultery?
If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?
Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?
Why is a person who plays the piano called a pianist, but a person who drives a race car not called a racist?
Why are "a wise man" and "a wise guy opposites"?
Why do overlook and oversee mean opposite things?

If horrific means to make horrible, does terrific mean to make terrible?
Why isn't 11 pronounced onety-one, since 22 is pronounced twenty-two?
If lawyers are disbarred and clergymen defrocked, doesn't it follow that electricians can be delighted, musicians denoted, cowboys deranged, models deposed, tree surgeons debarked and dry cleaners depressed?

Why is it that if someone tells you that there are 1billion stars in the universe you will believe them, but if they tell you a wall has wet paint you will have to touch it to be sure?
If you take an Oriental person and spin him around several times, does hebecome disoriented?
If people from Poland are called "Poles," why aren't people from Holland called "Holes"?

I REST MY CASE
Thanks.
Author unknown

Loves it!!!
LOL!

Visit my blog http://nairahood..com

Silly and funny language indeed. Notice how we pronouce 'stran-ger' vs 'hambur-ger" and they both end in 'ger'

Well that nearly had my stomach outside my mouth, yes, lo and behold! English will always remain the best of best language and you did the 'lol' part so well, I appreciate the way you presented the way English is and was. Yet I mush as well add that ENGLISH and the words of it are in numerous manifestations, known as, PUNS, COLLOCATIONS, SYNONYMS and many more, same meanings and I guess that explains all of it.
WOW!!! You have a really great peice of humour there yet all REAL.
I enjoyed reading it all and I am taking a print of it!!!

This is really a great piece! got me thinking seriously, actually languages expand from time to time. Part of the expansion comes when they get to borrow languages from others i guess thats why there is so much controversy,

cammy jr.:


Why do people Park on driveways and drive on parkways?

Real food for thought i must say. _{(but then, do our thoughts need food? )}

Sure is a funny language. LOL,