Got these jokes from some where, thought I'd share them,

A disappointed salesman of Coca-Cola returns from his Middle East
assignment. A friend asked, "Why weren't you successful with the Arabs?"

The salesman explained, "When I got posted in the Middle East, I
was very confident that I will makes a good sales pitch as Cola is
virtually unknown there. But, I had a problem I didn't know to
speak Arabic. So, I planned to convey the message through 3 posters,

First poster, a man crawling through the hot desert sand, totally
exhausted and panting.

Second, the man is drinking our Cola and

Third, our man is now totally refreshed. Then these posters were
pasted all over the place"

"That should have worked," said the friend.

The salesman replied, "Well, not only did I not speak Arabic,
I also didn't realize that Arabs read from right to left, "


WHY I DIDN'T SHOW UP FOR WORK

I had twelve bottles of whisky in my celler, and was told by my wife to
empty the contents of each bottle down the sink or else. So I said I would,
and proceeded with the unpleasant task.

I withdrew the cork from the first bottle and poured the contents down the
drain with the ecception of one glass, which I drank. I extracted tho cork
from the second bottle and did likewise, with the exception of one glass,
which I drank.

I then withdrew the cork from the third bottle and poured the whiskey down
the sink, with the exception of one glass, which I drank. I pulled the cork
from the fourth sink and poured the bottle down the glass which I drank;
pulled the bottle from the cork of the next and drank one sink out of it and
threw tho rest down the glass. I pulled the sink out ot the next glass and
poured the cork from the bottle. Then I corked the sink with the glass,
bottled the drank and drinked the pour. When I had every one emptied, I
steadied the house with one hand, counted the bottles, corks, and glasses,
and sinks with the other, which were 29, and as the house came by I counted
them again and finally had all the houses in one bottle which I drank.

I was not under tho alcofluence of incohol, as some theople pink I was.

I was not as thunk as you might drink. I felt so feelish, I didn't know who
was me, and the drunker I stood thero the longer I got.


A young husband comes home one night, and his wife throws her arms around
his neck: "Darling, I have great news: I'm a month overdue. I think we're
going to have a baby! The doctor gave me a test today, but until we find
out for sure, we can't tell anybody"

The next day, a guy from the electric company rings the door-bell,
because the young couple hasn't paid their last bill: "Are you Mrs.
Smith? You're a month overdue, you know!

", How do YOU know?" stammers the young woman.

Well, ma'am, it's in our files!" says the man from the electric company.

"What are you saying? It's in your files??"

"Absolutely."

"Well, let me talk to my husband about this tonight."

That night, she tells her husband about the visit, and he, mad as a
bull, rushes to the electric company offices the first thing the next
morning.

"What's going on here? You have it on file that my wife is a month
overdue? What business is that of yours?" the husband shouts.
"Just calm down," says the clerk, "it's nothing serious. All you have
to do is pay us,

"PAY you? and if I refuse?"

"Well, in that case, sir, we'd have no option but to cut yours off."

"And what would my wife do then?" the husband asks.


"I don't know. I guess she'd have to use a candle."

A car was involved in an accident near Limuru, Kenya. As expected a
large crowd gathered.

A KBC reporter, anxious to get his story could not get near the car.
Being a clever sort, he started shouting loudly,

"Let me through! Let me through! I am the son of the victim." The crowd
made way for him. Lying in front of the car was a donkey.

Guy even when I dey do JAMB for Sec. skool I no read this much

just too longgggggggggggg but you try sha

Bros, how long did it take you to type the whole project?

He probably did Copy and Paste.

Use punctuation marks pls , but the donkey own was hilarious sha