A sister was in the library and was doing her assignment then a guy approach her who she didn’t know but she knew he study in the same university. As he approached her he said to her “I like you and wanted to be your friend”. The sister got confused but didn’t say anything and she just lowered her gaze and started doing her assignment again. Then she tell her friends about it one of her friend said “Wow you are such a lucky girl, you should talk to him and get to know him and he is so handsome and may be you both will get married” and her other friend said “You should not talk to him if he is really serious he should have propose you for the marriage and should ask the contact number of your father. We should abstain from such relationships as in Islam we are not allowed to have vain and casual talk with non mehram. If someone is meant for you then you will eventually get in halal way. You don’t need to go through haram mean just to find your spouse. What if he’s not written for you and it will only break your heart”. She took the advice of both her friends and started thinking about it. After some days the guy approaches that sister again and asked what she thought about being friends. She replied calmly “If you are really interested in me you should ask the number of my father so you can contact him and ask for my hand in marriage.But you didn’t so you must know that in islam we are not allowed to have vain and casual talk with non mehram. I don’t want to be in any relationship that will displease my Creator”. After saying the sister left and the guy was speechless and ashamed of his act.
Moral: Make friends that give you sincere advice and encourage you to do good deeds and stop you from committing sins.”

jazzakAllahu khair

Wa antum fajazaakumullaahu bilkhaer

I'm still trying to get the lesson here.

Someone walk up to a lady and wants to know her, but she refused, she wants the guy to propose marriage to her instead and not getting to know her.

What if the so called "good friend" is wrong? She married the guy(followed the friend advice) and the guy became monster after marriage, who's to be blame? Shaitan?

Its very simple my brother, remember Q4 verses 22-23 which Allah says:

And do not marry at all those women whom your father had married, though what has happened in the past is excepted. This is an indecent and abominable thing and an evil practice.

Forbidden to you are your mothers, daughters, sisters, paternal aunts, maternal aunts,brothers daughters, sisters daughters, your foster mothers who have given suckle to you,your foster sisters who have taken suckle with you, the mothers of your wives, the daughters of your wives whom you have brought up, the daughters of your wives with whom you have conjugal relations, and it is not sinful for you to marry their daughters (after having divorced them). Also forbidden to you are the wives of your sons who are from your loins, and it is unlawful for you to keep two real sisters as wives at one and the same time, though what has happened in the past is excepted, for Allah is indeed Forgiving, Merciful.

The Arabic term mahram is derived from haraam which literally means something which is sacred, or sacrosanct, or prohibited. In the terminology of Islamic Jurisprudence a mahram relative is generally one to whom marriage is absolutely and permanently prohibited; and a non-mahram is generally one to whom marriage is permissible.

Whatever written of Truth and benefit is only due to Allah's Assistance and Guidance, and whatever of error is of me alone. Allah Alone Knows Best and He is the Only Source of Strength.

© Abu Faesol

^^^ If this post above is a response to my comment, you are going off point from the op.

Not response
Do u want a reply for that?

Taqwaconcept:
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Do u want a reply for that?

Yes

Nobody is to be blamed my brother because if he later turned into that, it is what Allah decreed for him (Qadar), Shaytaan is not to be blamed

Taqwaconcept:
Nobody is to be blamed my brother because if he later turned into that, it is what Allah decreed for him (Qadar), Shaytaan is not to be blamed

So what's the use of not getting to know the guy before marriage?

Islam asks us to approach the waliyyi of the spouse we wanna propose to.
Getting to know him is to study him well

Taqwaconcept:
Islam asks us to approach the waliyyi of the spouse we wanna propose to.

Getting to know him is to study him well

And what will the waliyyi (third party) do?

Does he has the telepathic ability to study the guy?

tintingz:
And what will the waliyyi (third party) do?

Does he has the telepathic ability to study the guy?

waliy is someone who already knows him or her.

Could be the biological parents or godparents. Most likely that folks know the 'spouses'. Today however, there might be corruption where ppl even 'rent' waliy who knows little or nothing about him or her.

Empiree:
waliy is someone who already knows him or her.

Could be the biological parents or godparents. Most likely that folks know the 'spouses'. Today however, there might be corruption where ppl even 'rent' waliy who knows little or nothing about him or her.

I know what waliy is, i just want to know how a waliy will know the kind of man a lady want, parents or guardians are most times bias when choosing suitors, they only want what is good for themselves and not what the child actually wants, these have caused a lot of damaged in marriages.

My dad always dictate the kind of woman i should bring home which in case not the kinda woman i even want as a wife, this has caused problems between my dad and elder brother, he(dad) is still not pleased with the wife he married and my elder brother loved his wife, now my brother is like a disobedient son in front of my dad but i can see happiness in my brother's marriage.

So if the op said someone should not get to know who he/she wants to spend his/her life with but propose marriage, is lame to me. Get to know the person with time(i am not talking about 2 days, 4 days, 2 weeks), then introduce the person to the waliy for approval and counselling.

tintingz:
I know what waliy is, i just want to know how a waliy will know the kind of man a lady want, parents or guardians are most times bias when choosing suitors, they only want what is good for themselves and not what the child actually wants, these have caused a lot of damaged in marriages.

it is both ways. There are people who also regret not taking their parents's advice marriage wise.

My dad always dictate the kind of woman i should bring home

mine is not.

which in case not the kinda woman i even want as a wife, this has caused problems between my dad and elder brother, he(dad) is still not pleased with the wife he married and my elder brother loved his wife, now my brother is like a disobedient son in front of my dad but i can see happiness in my brother's marriage.

marriage is like roller coaster. May be smooth at outstart and go south few years later. He may be happy now (and I wish him like that)...but then, things start to go south, he may not talk to you about it. It is just what it is. That's why divorce is there FOR A REASON. Nothing like "FOR BETTER FOR WORSE" should things not working out

So if the op said someone should not get to know who he/she wants to spend his/her life with but propose marriage, is lame to me.

there is room for courtship moderately. Truth be told, many court for years as much as 10yr and marry afterward, but their marriage crashes in far less than the amount of time they courted. You still have to question why despite long courtship. This is the reality of relationship in modern world. COURTSHIPS last far more than MARRIAGES. While it is good to know your potential spouse still doesn't guarantee you glue forever after marriage. It is roller coaster.

Get to know the person with time(i am not talking about 2 days, 4 days, 2 weeks), then introduce the person to the waliy for approval and counselling.

fair enough.

Empiree:
it is both ways. There are people who also regret not taking their parents's advice marriage wise.

Yes true, that is because those people are not ready to take responsibility of their actions, they think parents marriage advise are divine and not accepting it will lead to negative consequences, which is not even the case, they(parents) are just advising from experience they had, they are not perfect, they only want the best for their children.

mine is not.

Most parents are, lets say 9 out of 10, they dictate who their children should marry.

marriage is like roller coaster. May be smooth at outstart and go south few years later. He may be happy now (and I wish him like that)...but then, things start to go south, he may not talk to you about it. It is just what it is. That's why divorce is there FOR A REASON. Nothing like "FOR BETTER FOR WORSE" should things not working out

In marriage there is always ups and down, i dont believe in for better for worse either.

there is room for courtship moderately. Truth be told, many court for years as much as 10yr and marry afterward, but their marriage crashes in far less than the amount of time they courted. You still have to question why despite long courtship. This is the reality of relationship in modern world. COURTSHIPS last far more than MARRIAGES. While it is good to know your potential spouse still doesn't guarantee you glue forever after marriage. It is roller coaster.

10 years courtship is too long haba! any lady that go that long na lord of the ring , there are exceptions tho, those that know themselves from childhood, at least 6 months they should know what they both wants.

Yes knowing your spouse before marriage does not guarantee forever in marraige but it will give you the responsibility on what you overlook during courtship, but when two spouse does not know themselves before marriage and some negative things started developing after marriage, who is to be blame?

Reports said Saudi arabia has high rate of divorce case in the country.

fair enough.

Ok