HAPPY POSTHUMOUS BIRTHDAY TO MY HEROINE – MY MUM (BORN 17TH NOV. 1955)

“Tunde, you must come and see me now, I don’t care how busy you are. I want to see you now.” Those were the exact words of my Mum on the 29th of January 2012. Reluctantly, I retorted “Ehhhh, I will try Mummy”, “Don’t try, come”, “Yes Ma”. 2 days later, January 31st 2012 to be precise, I left my office at Ilupeju and moved straight to Seme, a boarder town between Nigeria and Benin Republic. Not wanting the stress of the Customs and Immigration, I boarded a bike who charged me N500. “Haba, how you go take collect N500, no worry, na me go settle, I go give you N300 just to carry me pass”. This Okadaman clad in a traditional yellow uniform for Bike Riders at this boarder town deliberately took the route that will expose me to immigration and Customs, thinking I will be reaped as I refused to give him the N500 he initially demanded. I noticed that as soon as he got to a spot, he will be moving his head in a North/South position, humming a meaningless song. But he did not know that as a son of the soil, a typical Lagos and Festac brought up, I knew he was communicating to the Customs and Immigration that I am a JJC (Johny Just Come). I smiled at his ignorance because, sometimes, “it is better to keep quiet, in other to fool the fool who thinks they are fooling you.”. He usually got surprised that, as soon as we are flagged down, the officers just ask me to go, to his surprise. When he finally dropped me, he asked, “Chef, you Benenoise”, I replied “No, me Togolese. Na why you dey shake your head like Agama Lizard; say make them catch me abi? I no know when Benenoise come spoil pass Nigeria”. I just paid him his N300 and took the next available bus to Dantokpa Market (One of the busiest Markets in West Africa). Eager to see my Mum, I jumped into a Cab going to Calavi. By then, I started pondering, why did she sound urgent? Is something wrong? Have I committed an offence?

Finally, I got to her, on her bed. My Mum had been diagnosed of Leukemia. We hugged and kissed, I cried, seeing her in that state, I cried uncontrollably, until her best friend came around to console me. Ignorantly I asked, “why are you this sick Mum, is it because we don’t come home often?”, slowly she retorted, “Yes”. She just wanted her children by her side, afterall, she had lost her husband. She wanted love, from her children who sucked from her breast, whom she suffered for. That night, she smiled and informed me of a plan to move her to a hospital in France for treatment, for which all arrangements had been concluded. They needed one of her child to be by her side, Femi was to be the one to escort her. The plan was to move her by February, but she died within a month of her medical trip to France. I suspected her smile when she broke the news, she knew it was time, she was ready to meet her Creator. When she echoed the words, "But i am going, take care of yourself and your kid brother. Never engage in any tussle with anyone over issues, especially house and land matter. Go to Jonas, he will be a father to you and Femi and always remember to say your prayers". I made attempt to stop her from saying these strange words, but for the first time in my adult life, my Mum said "Gbe enu da ke, kio gbo oro ti mo n so", shut your mouth and listen to what i am saying". Not knowing how else to respond, i said "Yes Ma". God gave her the rare priviledge of putting her house in other before her transition, what a woman of God. This woman really served God. I cannot thank you enough Uncle Jonas, God bless you for all your love and kindness towards your late sister and for always being a father figure to us. You have not stopped, you are not like those wicked Uncles we see in Nollywood films (Smiling). My prayer is that your family will be great, you will not know shame. You have been rock solid for us, God will be your shield and defense always. He will grant you, your wife and your children ear tingling testimonies in Jesus name. Amen!

Fast forward, after the tete a tete I had with my Mum, she gave specific instructions and told me she has finished her assignment, that she is going to the land where there is no sickness. I waved her thoughts off as a small child who will never see what an adult sees, even if he stands up. I will never forget that day, it was a Valentines day, I was having a discussion with my Pastors in Winners Chapel, Festac, at about 4pm, preparing for service with my Pastors when my Uncle called to say my Mum passed on to glory. I remember going to a quiet place to communicate with my Creator, to thank Him for the privilege to have known this woman who trained more than 18 children and graduates as Mother in the Motherless Children Home, faraway in Abomey Calavi, Republic of Benin. She dedicated her life to the service of mankind and lived her favourite quote being “Love Leads”.

Perhaps, if we visited home often our Mum will still be alive. I was busy running after vanities, which leads to vanity. Maybe if we showed her more love by calling, mapping out more time to holidaying with her, it might have prolonged her life. It is sad to say, but I think my Mum died out of love. She should have lived longer, had we been sensitive to her wanting to be with her boys always. I am not afraid to pen this, it is because I am a Writer and I love to talk about matters the way they are. Till today, I have not totally forgiven myself for my insensitiveness, selfishness and time I denied my Mum. She loved us with her everything, we loved her too, very much, just that we had a different way of showing it.

Sometimes God takes good people away too soon, to take them to a place of rest and bliss, afterall, we cannot question the Creator on how and when he choses to call his creation. My Mum pushed me spiritually, academically and encouraged me to always focus on anything I believe to be just and right. She would send me real flowers from far away Cotonou and letters sealed with kisses in her beautiful cursive writing. My Mum was an academia and disciplinary who will never compromise. A true and a very fine Christian who preached Love above every other thing.

Therese Sourou Raimi (Nee Zannou), you are a good woman, that was why God chose to take you on a valentines day, a day of love, which coincides with your name – Therese. Mummy, life has been tumultuous and riotous. The fight from the polygamous family you married into was tough, but God who continually defends the fatherless and the motherless has always shown himself faithful. From all these challenges, we have learnt lessons, and they have made us strong. After your demise, it was not long before the enemies started rearing their heads, but thank God for our strong faith in God, the defender of the defenseless. We have often cried to Him, and He has never failed to visit these tormentors, paying them in their own coin. Today Mum, our case is different, we are stronger, happier and in pursuits of purpose. Thank you for tutoring us as a good mother should. I am sorry, I will not be able to drop your flowers on your graveside today (17th November) due to exams, but I will send it with a kiss from here, with my heart and I know you will always receive it.

I have never ceased celebrating my Mum’s post-humous birthday since she passed on, but I wish she were alive now more than ever. Your birthday reminds me of the legacies you left behind and how you touched our lives in beautiful ways. You would have been 62 today, but who are we to question God? We consider ourselves blessed to have been given the rare opportunity of being your children. Your legacy is the foundation on which we stand today. You spent your life watching over people, but today, you just have to sit back and watch in your toga of love and affection as your children ride on Eagles wings. I am working on your Autobiography titled "My Mum Therese", I am sure you know the contents already (Smiling). I will not stop until everyone reads about this 6 feet tall, dark, beautiful and statuesque Port Novo lady who touched the world with her prayers, works and deeds. Guess what Mum, if they allow Facebook in heaven, I know you will be seeing this. I started my writing Career you pushed me into, and I will soon be referring to some of your write-ups.

Thank you for being so many things to us Mum, our Nurse, Teacher, Playmate, Advisor and Inspiration. So many have come and gone, but you are the one person who have always been there for us. I still have the Rosary you gave me, the souvenir from Jerusalem and a very big picture of you sitting in my Parlour. Mum, I see you everyday, I carry you and Dad in my wallet everyday, which literarily makes me see you everyday. Thank you Mum, for a lifetime of unconditional love. Yes, I still miss you Mum, I just wanted you to always know that “Je ne peux vivre san toi”. I missed our kisses and songs. I missed those beautiful French love songs from your melodious voice, coming from your perfect dentition with the finesse of that gap tooth. We are very lucky to have had an extra ordinary woman like you in our lives, just that our generation had a very different way of showing we love you. I remember how you would joyfully plait "Shuku Ologede", because you know it ismy favourite female hairstyle. How you would force me to eat and eat healthy as and when due. Oh Sweet Mummy, your boys really miss you! Of a truth, "Iya ni wura".

If you have been patient enough to read this epistle up to this point, please join me celebrate my MUM, without whom you and i would never have known. Maybe I would have been born in Somalia (smiling). My only advise to you is to take care of your parents the best you can. Not necessarily money, my Mum was comfortable, but I was not there for her emotionally. If I could turn back the hand of time, I will do anything to have my Mum back, for just 2 seconds. No matter how aggrieved you are, your parents could have aborted your pregnancy when they had you, but they did not, that is unconditional AGAPE LOVE.

If you are inspired by this post, please show your parents physically, materially, emotionally and above all lovingly that you adore them, even when they seem in a state where they are not able to help themselves again. Pick up your phone, call them and sing them songs that will make them happy, map out visitation time amd don't be like me who was busy chasing nothing. Tell them how much they mean to you, buy them an I-Phone, build them houses, buy them cars. Make this month and festive period a season of reunion and love between you and your parents. I will give anything to have my parents alive as you now.

My name is Babatunde Raimi, all I have been trying to say since is – HAPPY BIRTHDAY MY EVERGREEN SWEET MUMMY (Therese Sourou Raimi Nov. 17, 1955 to Feb. 14, 2012)

Je t’taime Mama Tunde.

Photo Credit: Temitope Ebohon (Thank You). This picture was taken sometime in 2010, on our way to Church, St. Antoine De Padou, Abomey Calavi, Republic of Benin.

Your Boy.

wow....This brought tears to my eyes..honestly. Thank God for her life and for the lives that she touched.
Thank you for part about always showing our parents how much we love them. A lot of us don't know how to.
May her soul continue to rest in peace and may you make her even more proud than she would have ever imagined.

Very nice. RIP ma.

Wow.....
Touching

Wow! A long read but worth the time.......
Happy posthumous birthday to her. She would have turned 52 this year.
Is Babatunde of mixed parentage?

Cuddlebugie:
Wow! A long read but worth the time.......
Happy posthumous birthday to her. She would have turned 52 this year.
Is Babatunde of mixed parentage?

. Yep.