1. only tell close family when exactly you are coming home.

My family don't even know I'm planning to visit. They'll just see me at their door. Hope my mum won't collapse in shock

You people do not know him or his family. For him to say he is afraid of his family should make you wonder. Is it possible to not tell them exactly when you will be coming and then stay in Lagos and maybe fly your parents to Lagos to see you. My mom has a good friend in Atlanta who never steps foot in Benin when she goes to Nigeria. She stays in Lagos. She has reason to be afraid of what her family can plan for her. We have heard horror stories. I say go with your gut. Just don't let fear stop you from going back home. Nigeria is very big and you can come and go without certain people not even knowing you came. Go with God.

@poster,
I think the house (those who weren't mad at you)adequately addressed the question or the advice sought. From personal experience, please speak Pidgin mostly, go low key, be elusive as best as you could. Most of the crisis visiting Nigerians get are self inflicted. Just be watchful

I had noted before in this forum that, you will get robbed in the Bronx NY before you get robbed in Oshodi or Ikeja. and I kid you not. Nigeria is bad, don't let us lie to ourselves in shame, but, c'mon we're all naijas, shine your eye well well.


Used the precautions outlined and you will be nearly as safe as you could get.

snowdrops:

@ poster

please disregard all the negative comments. know that there are a lot of half brains here that are ready to criticize people for no just reasons.

you said you are from Benin. which area are you intending to travel to? i was in Benin twice last yr and once this yr.

1. only tell close family when exactly you are coming home.
2. chill out in Lagos first before going to Benin
3. let your movement be UNPREDICTABLE. keep changing hotels, and alternate with staying at home. let no one know where you are at any given time
4. don't were fancy jewelry or drive expensive cars. just dress simply to suit the hot weather
5. never take okada to your home address if you have to use one.
6. God forbid you are being followed run to the nearest police station

Nigeria is a jungle. People living there especially in trouble areas have become so comfortable with hard life that they chew you raw with envy and indignation when you raise you concerns. Good luck. with the right precautions there is a 99% chance of staying safe

most sensible response so far

@St-Kris

I dont blame those of you that think everyone in Naija is after you cos you just came in from abroad. What most of you dont understand is that people have moved up and no one cares about you. 

The way some people brag about coming to naija one would think they are bringing $1M dollars, you bring your broke backside with $5 dollar Tshirts/pants and you think you want to impress people?

The real people with real networth do not make noise, they just board the plane fly into naija and enjoy themselves.
Abeg make i hear word joo!

The way some people brag about coming to naija one would think they are bringing $1M dollars

Maybe the OP is going with a million dollars

you will be save. Things have changed in the last 8yrs most people are not waiting for your money. You may discover they are better than you in monitary terms. Just be yourself and enjoy your stay.

are u afraid of Ur fellow human beings!. it makes me feel bad when i hear things like this, don't u know that when u nurture the believe that they will do something bad to u when u come back, it will make u to be always afraid of them. so, young man don't be afraid of Ur fellow human beings o.k. naija is Ur father's land and u were born and brought up in Benin. it's just 8 years and u are afraid like this, what about if it's like 20yrs, maybe u forget u are from Nigeria. let them be afraid of u instead of u being afraid of them aight !

Thank you; unclebros, I wonder oooo. So many think that people back home are hungry. If u dont have any witches & wizards in your family that are waiting to kill you. There is no point of being scared of coming home. As other reasonable people here earlier advised; dont just show off, just be urself, blend with people, talk 2 them d way they'll understand. I promise you, u'll absolutely av a good tym.

So many think that people back home are hungry.

So my mum has been lying to me Everyday she calls me "we are hungry here O" "we are starving here O" "Send pounds O"

I am waiting for her next phone call

lol @ omo Alata they say it all the tyme, i'm sure your mum use to feign sickness too,

i'm sure your mum use to feign sickness too

Laakuli Yes Oh. OMG!!! Then I will head over to Money Transfer straightaway. Her secret has been revealed on Nairaland. I await her

The post about the girl with a Norwegian boyfriend did not receive sympathy because of the way she was said to be carrying herself. I however think it could be difficult if you’re travelling home with a white partner – this whole advise not to be show off and not to be flashy would fall through the window since people will see from miles that you live abroad. The whole story about kidnapping does also not help 

A friend who is married to a white woman, with kids, is visiting Nigeria with all of them and has confessed to feeling anxious once in a while about the trip. What do people think about this kind of scenario?

What do people think about this kind of scenario?

When I was a little girl, aged 8, my parents took me to Nigeria on holiday for the first time. The witches in my family appeared to me O so I'm now a bit fearful that I'm taking my children on holiday next month but we will tighten our prayer and fasting belt and reign victorious. Halleluyah. Amen

unclebros:

@St-Kris

I dont blame those of you that think everyone in Naija is after you cos you just came in from abroad. What most of you dont understand is that people have moved up and no one cares about you.

The way some people brag about coming to naija one would think they are bringing $1M dollars, you bring your broke backside with $5 dollar Tshirts/pants and you think you want to impress people?

The real people with real networth do not make noise, they just board the plane fly into naija and enjoy themselves.
Abeg make i hear word joo!

now, can u kindly tell me when 'be cautious' has ever been a wrong advice. i endorsed a response that said just that. The problem here is double standards; i can bet an arm that the very u running ur mouth in this scenario, would still do the same if the OP had started a thread narrating how he had visited naija, threw caution to the wind as he flashed cash here n there, then something really bad happened.

'unclebros' would go "mumu, u come naija no shine ur eye, u no know say boys eye dey red" .

YES nigerians who work horrible jobs here, making $8 an hour often make the biggest fuss when visiting home, and are generally annoying.
However, the fact remains; whether u'r going to naija, china, brooklyn, compton or wherever, u'r never wrong in "being cautious"

If anyone, out of sentiment cant comprehend the rationale behind that, then i weak 4 u o!

after 20 years in the UK, returned to Nigeria with £20 in my pocket early 2009, now I have over N70million in my account and growing with strictly legit business.

hence my tag, Faith in 9 ja!!!!

How do you spend 20 years in the UK and have only 20 bucks. Okay I guess it happens because my cousin was telling me how a medical doctor sat in living room and was crying because he had spend his whole life in the UK as a medical doctor and had nothing to show for it. I simply told her that her friend had serious problems. I don't understand how a medical doctor can retire with not a penny saved. Not even a piece of land to his name.

I don't understand how a medical doctor can retire with not a penny saved.

Black power Oh. I raise bum for una

you think a piece of land signify's achievement? it's good to save, but life can throw up all sorts of permutations and but as long as you have your health, your wits and your faith, then you can always bounce back.

Whilst thousands in the America were thrown on the scrap heap because of the Credit Crunch, some of us had the advantage, yes advantage to have another country to go and using our wits, faith and experience we are able to start again in Nigeria and by God's Grace grow fast, if growing means acquiring more money, then I have grown really fast.

So my girl, poster, no fear Nigeria, instead embrace her,

faithin9ja:

you think a piece of land signify's achievement? it's good to save, but life can throw up all sorts of permutations and but as long as you have your health, your wits and your faith, then you can always bounce back.

Whilst thousands in the America were thrown on the scrap heap because of the Credit Crunch, some of us had the advantage, yes advantage to have another country to go and using our wits, faith and experience we are able to start again in Nigeria and by God's Grace grow fast, if growing means acquiring more money, then I have grown really fast.

So my girl, poster, no fear Nigeria, instead embrace her,

Where did I say it was. Credit crunch, credit crunch. I know a lot of people that the credit crunch did not affect their lifestyles significantly here in the US and I know people in Nigeria that it totally affected them. Opportunities abound everywhere. You just have to know how to go about it. I know an american md here who has been married three times, pays child support to two wives and alimony to at least one. he is no where near broke. If you do not plan you will run into trouble anywhere in the world. It is that simple. It is not how much money you bring in but how you take care of it.

I know an american md here who has been married three times, pays child support to two wives and alimony to at least one. he is no where near broke.

Good role model

Omo Alata:

Good role model

For who? He is looking for another wife and was eying someone I know. I quickly ran out of the conversation because I no fit wish that one on anybody

Pardon my asking but how old are u?, i dont seem to understand it when pple that lived over 15 - 20years of their lives in nigeria (Nur, Pry, Sec sch), travel abroad and after like 5years say they are not used to the nigerian way of life, they dont trust their people and all the plenty cock and bull story. to me that is crap. this is your country,those are your people. whats the fear all about? except your people were of questionable character even before u left the country

i dont seem to understand it when pple that lived over 15 - 20years of their lives in nigeria (Nur, Pry, Sec sch), travel abroad and after like 5years say they are not used to the nigerian way of life

Methinks it's the other way round i.e. we have lived abroad for 15-20 years and now no longer used to the Nigerian way of life

ok.:

The post about the girl with a Norwegian boyfriend did not receive sympathy because of the way she was said to be carrying herself. I however think it could be difficult if you’re travelling home with a white partner – this whole advise not to be show off and not to be flashy would fall through the window since people will see from miles that you live abroad. The whole story about kidnapping does also not help 

A friend who is married to a white woman, with kids, is visiting Nigeria with all of them and has confessed to feeling anxious once in a while about the trip. What do people think about this kind of scenario?

I would be grateful for advice on what to tell this friend - how to be careful and all that. His wife is white and they have children. He plans to visit Nigeria with them this year.

I would be grateful for advice on what to tell this friend - how to be careful and all that. His wife is white and they have children. He plans to visit Nigeria with them this year.

I think they'll be OK and given a warm reception tbh. He should fear not

@ poster
where are u coming back from?

My friend and I were talking about this a few days ago.

She's also originally from Benin but she's as scared as hell to go back. All she thinks about is all the horror stories of kidnapping and murder. My brother's friend lost his dad last year when he went to Benin in a car accident. Anything crazy could happen anywhere not just in Naija - it's God that protects.

One thing I've never heard is being afraid of family. How can you be afraid of your own family - are they that evil?!!

Anyways, I hope I never feel the way you do. The chances are quite slim anyways lol. I'm in Nigeria almost every year. I can't speak pidgin (I can write it, weird lol) and I totally disagree with some dumb comment saying "don't fake your accent". If you haven't been in Nigeria for a while, you definitely can't talk like a Nigerian. I know some people fake it, but u definitely would sound different esp if you're younger. I've experienced the weird looks people give in Nigeria when you sound "different".

Just talk how you usually do. I can't fake a Nigerian accent, I've tried and I sounded stupid.

when you first land make sure you check your passport after the immigration as stamped you in,make sure the passport given to you his yours.Then keep you passport and return ticket in the inner part of your body or some where safe apart .Atleast you should trust one person in your family,Dont change money outside the airport,change alittle inside the airport.Stay in lagos before you move to benin,dont attempt to go to benin same night.get yourself a Nigerian sim card ,dont form any accent,be normal,be causal,no ear rings,nose rings and all the bling bling,so that you dont attract attention.Speak pigin english once in a while,it make yo sound tough some how when you yarn pidgin.Dont spend credit card in the hotel.seperate you money.incase one part is stolen you can use the other part.Drive a moderate car.Watch out for simple girls and the homely ones,aviod fast lane girls.have sex in your home,avoid drinking to mcuh.stay where you are,once is midnight,stay there till morning.enjoy

One thing I've never heard is being afraid of family. How can you be afraid of your own family

Bi iku ile o pa ni