As I woke up this morning, I asked the Holy Spirit
what He would have me share with my friends.
Here is what was laid in my heart. I remembered
all the ladies I have counseled, ladies who are
bitten by the bug of fear of turning "30" and
those in mid-30s I hear lines like "Aunt Esther, I
will be 30 and I am still single, will I ever get
someone to marry me?" Of course, I understand
such fear because I have been there. There are
five myths about turning 30 and I will like to
share and hopefully dissolve them from your
heart. Myth #1. If you are not married at age 30
you are doomed. You have reached the age
where no man will pick interest in marrying you.
You are made to believe something is actually
wrong with you. Myth #2. Men would stop
looking at your side because you will be less
attractive than you were in your 20s. Myth #3.
Virgin Ladies who gets married in their 30s will
experience a very terrible and excruciating pain
on their wedding night (they often place
unreasonable stress on the description of the
pain). Myth #4. The hymen gets thicker by the
years and can make it more difficult for the
deflowering process. Myth #5 A lady's fertility
dwindles in her 30s. To start with, When I was a
teenager, I really can't explain how it filtered into
my subconscious mind that "If a lady is
unmarried at age 30 it would require a washing
of her head at the river before she could get a
husband" I heard many people say that again and
again. So I feared clocking 30 still single more
than I looked forward to being 30. Do you
understand what I mean? I drew my life plan and
set my clock to get married at 25. Unfortunately
for me I didn't get admission to the University till
I clocked 22, even the admission was "2 years
Diploma" Thanks to Nigeria Education system,
with the recurrent ASUU Strikes, I was 25 at the
time I started my Degree program which placed
me in 200L and 3 years left to graduate... This is
where frustration sets in. I was sad when I
clocked 25, marriage was not in view at all,
though I was in a relationship which later ended
at our graduation. The honest truth is that I was
not even "MADE" for Marriage at that age.
Though I pushed the myth out of my heart at
some point as I grew up but it had left me with
frustration I had to deal with in the following
years of my single life. On my 29th birthday, I
was still hopeful, I baked a cake for myself and
celebrated with my neighbors. A neighbor said
jokingly "This time next year, we shall come to
eat your birthday cake in your husband's house"
Can you imagine? My mom was angry with that
prayer. Eventually the much dreaded "age 30"
met me single and the only good thing I saw in
my life was my ministry and my job but no man
in my life. On my 30th birthday, I locked myself
in, I refused to hang out with my friends to
celebrate, I wept, I set aside the day that ought
to be my happiest day, for a saddest day. Why?
Because I was single at 30. My eye balls were
swollen. Some days later, the Holy Spirit lectured
me and it changed my mind totally about my
single hood and waiting. He gave me a Scripture
" Blessed be God, even the Father of our Lord
Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies, and the God
of all comfort; Who comforteth us in all our
tribulation, that we may be able to comfort them
which are in any trouble, by the comfort
wherewith we ourselves are comforted of God."
2 Corinthians 1:3-4 Do you understand the reason
for my love for the Singles Now? With my new
understanding, I started wishing I had a party at
my 30th Birthday, I wished I gave myself a nice
treat, I wished I had a cake, nice wine and some
photos. I wished I enjoyed the job it brought. I
wished I could redo my 30th birthday. Anyways I
am fast approaching my 40th Birthday and
nothing will stop me for celebrating it in a grand
way. Well it is generally believed that age 30 is a
magical age where you are supposed to have
carved a niche for yourself in your career, settled
down in marriage and have Kids. There's nothing
wrong in achieving all of these if possible at that
age but what this kind of reasoning does to you
is frustration and depression if things doesn't
work out for you that way. I hope someone will
learn from my past. Marriage is not an end in
itself. Don't be too focused on getting married,
the future soon to happen and you missed the
joy of the ride along the way. I tell you there is
no any existing expiration age for Marriage. In
fact, not everybody would get married at 25. It is
not about your age. There's an appointed time!
Our last born, little sister"s time came and she
got married even before me. Dispel negative
philosophy and fear out of your mind with God's
Word. Know what God is saying about your life
at this time of waiting! The Holy Spirit told me
that I would meet my husband IN THE PLACE OF
MY ASSIGNMENT. (while fulfilling my vision). I
have counseled many ladies who settled down
with just any available guy because of their age.
Single hood doesn't make you less of a woman!
You are not a failure! You are not doomed! It is
not over! You are not damaged goods! Get rid of
those myths! Of course, when you reach your
maturity age, it levels down the type of guys that
will approach you. You have passed the age
where one guy who sags his trousers will come
running after you with his Whizzing. There are
matured guys for matured babes. You will attract
only serious minded men, your level will scare
away men who are not ready for commitment.
How attractive you are is your choice and not
your age 30 or above! Don't dress down! Look
great and moderate! Don't allow depression pitch
a tent of wrinkles on your face! I got married in
my 30s and I tell you there's no extra pain. Get
wisdom and in all your getting, get
understanding. Friends, can you please go out
there and fulfill your VISION! Let life continue!
My last Word for you "You can't press the pause
button on your life and be expecting God to bring
a man that has a remote control to press play,
PRESS PLAY AND ENJOY LIFE" The waiting will
soon be over.
Esther Ebunoluwa Omoniyi
http://gistchristlikes..com/2018/05/top-5-false-myths-of-being-single-at.html

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