AN ABIA CORPER'S MEMOIR
EPISODE ONE: THE REGISTRATION

It was Tuesday, 2nd May, 2017 and I had still not concluded my NYSC online registration that commenced on the 20th of the previous month. I don’t really know why I always end up doing things at the eleventh hour even when I don’t want to. Am I the only one serving the 'eleventh hour miracle God'? I know you're thinking I'm unserious but it will interest you to know that I was up from the night before registration commenced to the early hours of registration day but circumstances beyond my control showed up.

Similar situations occurred while in school. I completed, printed and submitted my industrial training (IT) report on the deadline date, my final year project thesis was submitted on the defense day when presentation had already commenced, I completed my final clearance on the day when the list of those to be sent for NYSC batch A was been compiled (thanks to my project supervisor who gave my partner and I extra work beyond the project scope even after defense), even the university official that went to submit the list in Abuja arrived on the deadline date (though I have no hand in this) and the list goes on.

As I was saying, I commenced registration on the day the portal was opened but couldn’t proceed without biometric (finger print) capture. I spent a lot of time trying to do this with a fingerprint scanner brought by my elder brother's colleague but to no avail as the site only recognizes Digita Persona fingerprint scanner. I searched Apapa, where I was living for a place to continue the registration but it turned out to be too expensive. I know what you're thinking, "stingy guy" but come on, the price charged by the computer operator was twice the amount elsewhere (in Ajegunle) where the only additional cost is just a token to cross over a foot bridge.

I went to Ajegunle to continue my registration but the payment portal was not working. I returned two more times on different days and eventually collected the #3000 processing fee from the computer operator with the intention of trying it myself at home. I finally made the payment manually at the bank and completed my registration successfully.

#nysc #corper #abia_corper

AN ABIA CORPER'S MEMOIR
EPISODE TWO: THE DELAY

I was living with my elder brother; he goes to work while I stayed at home. To keep myself busy, I read and also began a personal project I had postponed since my 300 level for yet other reasons beyond my control. I started again and kept to my schedule for the first few days but later got tired, maybe because I felt it was not going to work. I continued though, but lagged behind, at least, as they say, "at all at all naim bad pass". All the while, the thought of NYSC consumed my mind as I hoped to be posted to Abia state where I thought I could run some businesses with my Igbo brothers.

On the eve of the day of receiving my call-up letter, my dad called me to pick up the items he bought for my orientation camp. I was pleased after seeing that almost everything on my list was bought and was told to come pick the remaining in a few days. I got back home late and decided to stay awake till I received my call-up letter.

Gbagaun, it's twelve midnight and I logged in only to see the following message: you will be notified when to print your call-up letter because you are not in stream 1. My heart sank faster than the titanic. "Oh no", I thought, "not eleventh hour again" because to me stream 2 is like the eleventh hour. I quickly checked the WhatsApp group created by one of my school mates for my school PCMs (prospective corps members) and everyone was experiencing the same thing. I heaved a sigh of relief and thought, "this is going to be different, I won't be in stream 2" and could then sleep peacefully.

I woke up hours later, checked my phone and saw congratulatory messages on the WhatsApp group as fellow PCMs posted screen shots of their posting letters. I logged in the NYSC website and seeing the same message broke my heart more than a break-up from a twelve year old relationship would and like Job in the Bible I thought, "that which I fear most has happened to me". Questions kept coming into my head: how long will I remain at home? When is stream 2? What will I be doing at home? And I came to the conclusion that I was going to look for a job, I was going to make this waiting period worthwhile.

#nysc #corper #abia_corper

AN ABIA CORPER'S MEMOIR
EPISODE THREE: THE CALL-UP

In the evening of the day I received my 'uncalled-up' letter, I told my elder brother to help me talk to someone so I can work as a volunteer, i.e. work without pay so I could utilize properly the one month I thought I had but it didn’t go through. So, I continued working on my personal project. As I stated earlier, I commenced the project while in school and planned to complete it within eight months but only scratched the surface. During this waiting period, I started all over and completed it within six weeks (despite my lagging behind) and I felt great about it.

After this, I became bored and wanted something else I could do. I began going for walks to see if I could find something tangible to do but nothing came up. So I stayed at home, thinking, making plans, reading, sleeping, watching movies, listening to new songs and programmes on the radio and TV. I must confess that doing these activities during this period was not really interesting but it was at least better than doing nothing.

During one of my walks (now I take walks just to feed my eyes and think) one cool evening, I began to think about how I had spent the last seven months of my life. I graduated in November, 2016 and it was almost the end of June, 2017 and I was still at home waiting to be called up for NYSC. I grieved about the time wasted and thought about all that could have been done, if I had the resources I needed anyway. You might say I utilized it somewhat wisely but I still felt more could have been done. Then, I came to the conclusion that I was going to recover all the lost time during my service year; I was going to make every second count.

The day stream 2 call-up letters were sent finally came, it was Friday, 21st July around 6pm. I did another vigil that night trying to check where I was posted to but the over-congested server didn’t go through. The next day, my elder brother who was also checking it for me called to tell me I had been posted to Abia state - the state I really wanted to go. My joy went through the roof and for the first time in a long time, I was happy with the government. Orientation camp was to begin the next Wednesday, 26th July but I made plans to travel on Monday.

Monday, 24th July finally came and I left home as early as 05:20am but began my journey after spending about 3 hours at the motor park. The eleven hour journey ended when I arrived at the NCCF (Nigeria Christian Corpers' Fellowship) family house, Umuahia. Fortunately for me, the NCCF car came to pick me at the park (I had contacted Tessy, my school mate who was in stream 1 and living in the family house) and made the final part of my journey stress-free. I was assigned to a room where I had the privilege of meeting friendly corpers who welcomed me with open arms, fed me and made the hectic day end well.

#nysc #corper #abia_corper

AN ABIA CORPER'S MEMOIR
EPISODE FOUR: THE ARRIVAL

The next morning, after the general morning devotion, we resumed the various discussions we started the night before with me been the 'questionnaire'. I later went to a nearby cafeteria and had a nice meal of Eba with an amalgamation of Egusi and Draw soup, went for a walk and took some selfies (my first in Abia state). Facebook, Instagram and WhatsApp began to feel my presence in Abia state. I planned travelling to the orientation camp later that day but the heavy downpour impeded it, so I postponed my journey to the next morning and I was glad I did.

The D-day finally arrived and I left for the park before 7am. The bus I boarded was saturated with the smell of crayfish and other 'aromas' I couldn't decipher as I was crammed between women going to the market.

I got to Umuna Bende, the location of the orientation camp and was told alongside other PCMs by a man o' war personnel to carry our luggage on our heads as we entered the camp gate. After checking our call-up letter and luggage for 'contrabands', we commenced the preliminary registration after which we went to a 'bed chamber' to pick beds which we took to our hostels. Our documents were screened and we were given our state codes, a four digit number, the last digit been our platoon number, so there are ten platoons. For example, my number was 2913, so I was in platoon 3. I was surprised at the number of married women, pregnant women and nursing mothers I saw. We collected our kits which were given to us randomly (I wonder what our kit size was used for during the online registration), so we had to exchange the kits among ourselves to get our sizes.

I put on my kit, joined the parade and was surprised to notice that the headache I was feeling earlier had disappeared. Our platoon instructor (a soldier) was a very strict man who did not hesitate to give punishments, light ones though, such as frog jump and sitting on the floor. Later, we were taught the NYSC as well as the Abia state anthem. The bugle (a small trumpet-like instrument used in keeping time) was blown by 6pm and everyone had to stand at attention while the NYSC and Nigerian flag were dropped and parade was dismissed for the day.

I took a walk round camp and saw about four of my school mates who were still trying to do their registration and after chatting for a while, I went to the infamous mammy market (the camp market). Mammy market was the happening place where you get whatsoever you wanted at a price that was quite expensive. I took a walk round, from the various cafeterias, to the bar, video coverage shops where videos of the day's event were shown, etc. This walk was short-lived as a result of the heavy downpour that ensued.

#nysc #corper #abia_corper

AN ABIA CORPER'S MEMOIR
EPISODE FIVE: THE TEMPTATION
Thursday, 27th July, 2017

I eventually woke up by 02:45am after waking up earlier to check the time. Even though I slept for less than five hours, I felt refreshed, maybe because of the cold weather. I got water, brushed my teeth and took my bath and was all set for the morning parade before 4am. By 5am, the bugle was blown and we all rushed out and lined up according to our platoons, then the good news came. The camp director addressing us through the PA system told us to go back in because of the cold. There was uproar of applause and shouts as we all rushed back in, more than we came out, primarily to resume the nice, cool sleep.

Later in the day, I went to the OBS building (OBS, the camp media house where you can serve as a presenter, editor, newscaster, photographer, dj, etc., means Orientation Broadcasting Service.) to be interviewed by OBS executives because I had indicated interest and filled the membership form earlier in the day. I was interviewed alongside other intending members and indicated interest in presenting, something I have been passionate about certainly because of the role of an mc I played several times while in school.

After the evening parade, I went to mammy market to buy fried fish that will enable me eat the almost tasteless rice served for dinner and also to collect my khaki I had given to a tailor earlier in the day to slim fit for me. I took the slim-fitted clothes to a laundry man to iron for me and took a walk round the market. The first thing that caught my attention was suya, chicken suya pleasing to the eye and I allowed myself to fall into the temptation as Eve did with the forbidden fruit. After tasting the suya I bought at a price greater than a plate of good meal, I discovered it was not as tasty as it looked and regretted my decision to spend my money unwisely. I took the remaining suya back to the hostel since I got tired of it but eventually ate it before going to bed to get my money's worth.

#nysc #corper #abia_corper

AN ABIA CORPER'S MEMOIR
EPISODE SIX: THE SWEARING IN
Friday, 28th July, 2017

I woke up the next morning feeling surprisingly good because I was expecting to wake up with either a running stomach or 'running bowels' or both. On the contrary, I didn’t even go to the toilet throughout the day and my body showed signs of appreciation for giving it the chicken suya and I thought, "maybe the taste was not the suya vendor's fault but my taste buds the night before". After dressing up as a 'white fowl' (a term used to denote our uniform of white vest on white shorts, with white socks and shoes), I went to the OBS building so we could take the instruments to the parade ground and set them up before parade commenced as we had done the day before.

There was something special about today's arrangement since it is the day that 'dey will swear for us', i.e. swearing in ceremony, the ceremony that will transform us from PCMs to CMs (corps members). Canopies were set up on the stage and more chairs including settees were arranged, a rug was laid on the stage and the deejay was also present with his instruments.

After the morning parade, I went for my breakfast of something that looked like tea, bread and boiled egg and later changed into my seven over seven (the complete khaki attire with boots, cap, socks, white vest and belt) for the first time. Before today, I had never experienced a 0% battery but unfortunately for me, it happened on a day that was supposed to be a picture-taking day. I thought of what to do since not taking photographs today meant I will have to wait till the closing ceremony (which is in about 3 weeks’ time) before I could take photographs with my 7/7. Finally, I spoke with some friends (I use the word 'friend' loosely) and ended up taking more photographs than I would have taken if I were to use only my phone.

The swearing-in ceremony was finally over (after waiting for the representative of the governor for hours under the rain) and we were told to go collect our transportation allowance of #1500. When I went to get mine, the queue I saw there was unending, so I decided to queue for lunch instead. One of my roommate didn’t collect the food which looked like Okra soup and Eba, so I took his meal ticket because I didn’t want to waste the food (I know you don’t believe me) even though it was small. On getting there, I saw that many had not collected their meal and it was already finished, remaining just a few meats that couldn’t go round. The woman in charge of the kitchen apologized to the angry, hunger-driven corps members and shared the remaining meats.

After the evening parade, I went for the NCCF evening service. NCCF have been holding a daily evening programme that will run for the first twenty days in camp (since we won't spend the evening of the 21st day in camp) tagged 'Mighty Men'. It was a wonderful service with a timely message and I was richly blessed.

That night before we slept, the camp official in charge of our hostel came to address us and chose a hostel governor. Among the things he said was that no one should go out after light-out and this prevented me from washing my clothes as I planned earlier.

#nysc #corper #abia_corper

AN ABIA CORPER'S MEMOIR
EPISODE SEVEN: THE FIRST PARTY
Saturday, 29th July, 2017

My alarm woke me up at exactly 3am. After a short prayer of appreciation to God for the new day and then writing about the previous day's experience, I set out to purchase water I would use to wash my clothes and white shoe. I went out for the morning parade which was unusually short as we went for lectures on security and CDS (Community Development Service). Unknown to me, the presenters were having a meeting at the OBS building and I missed it (I had almost missed last night's meeting where OBS tags were given to all members).

After the lectures, I found out about the meeting and went in search of the head Presenter, Funky to tell her I wasn’t aware of the meeting and she agreed to give me the opportunity to cover for what I missed. Afterwards, I rushed for the platoon 3 family meeting where a stand-in platoon officer (ours travelled earlier in the day) briefed us concerning what we are to know during the service year. She rounded up by telling us the various inter-platoon competitions that would take place in camp. They include football, volleyball (for females), Mr. and Miss NYSC, dance and drama, Miss BBB (Big, Bold and Beautiful), cooking and debate competition.
***
Today's evening parade was interesting as we learnt some advanced parade routines and for the first time, our platoon instructor, Malami smiled and even laughed because he was impressed with us.

I went for the welcome party when it was just commencing at 08:45pm. A representative of Indomie noodles, the event sponsor commenced the show by asking Indomie-related questions and gave prices to those that answered correctly. Next was dancing competition followed by corps members’ musical performance, comedy, eating competition and drama presentation. All these happened amidst loud noises and poor sound. The party ended by 10:08pm but the dj continued playing for about 15 minutes which seemed longer because of the fun in the air as many climbed the stage to dance energetically to the music blaring from the loud speakers.

#nysc #corper #abia_corper

AN ABIA CORPER'S MEMOIR
EPISODE EIGHT: THE FIRST SUNDAY
Sunday, 30th July, 2017

Sunday came and I woke up almost four hours longer than normal because I wanted to relax, but had this incredibly serious headache. I went for the NCCF Sunday service anyway and it was powerful with amazing testimonies, heart-felt praise and worship, impactful drama ministration, inspirational choir ministration, prophetic Word ministration and fervent, earth-shaking prayer session. A lot of dignitaries were present including the NYSC state coordinator. A senior friend of the fellowship came up after the state coordinator addressed us to talk about important certified short courses that will be organized during the course of the service year.

At the close of service, I went to the kitchen for breakfast but it was already finished, so I went to mammy market to get something to eat. I ordered for a plate of Eba and Vegetable soup accompanied by fried fish that out-lasted both the Eba and the soup. There, I met Joy, a fellow platoon 3 and OBS member and we introduced ourselves to one another.

After a short siesta, I went for the OBS meeting where the social director addressed us. She was not happy with the previous day's event but corrected and advised us on what to do in subsequent events. The time for the evening parade came, after which the inter-platoon football and volleyball competitions kicked off. The rain descended heavily upon us and we ran to the pavilion, a tent-like building but the players continued playing in the rain.

After dinner, I went for the NCCF evening service where a film show was ongoing. The movie was both entertaining and enlightening and we rounded up with prayers. I went straightaway to mammy market where the video coverage people were showing a video of the previous Mr. and Miss NYSC competition. Beside the shop, corps members played snooker, then the bugle blew - it was light out.

#nysc #corper #abia_corper

AN ABIA CORPER'S MEMOIR
EPISODE NINE: THE HEAVY RAIN
Monday, 31st July, 2017

The bugle blew for the morning devotion at 5am and I was already prepared as usual. As the camp director addressed us, she announced that two corpers got drunk the night before, one defecated on himself and the other fell from the top bunk at night, was rushed to the hospital and that both will be punished for the irresponsibility. Other defaulters who were at the camp market when lectures were ongoing on Saturday were called out. The parade commenced proper with the man o' war drills while the sanitation police (volunteer sanitation corpers who wore blue vests over their white tops) kept the environment clean. The drills were more or less exercises that we did while singing funny, meaningless songs such as jankara market, anything I do monkey do, etc.

We went for lectures after breakfast where we received traditional lecture on Abia state, HIV/AIDS sensitization and male and female condom demonstrations, inspirational/motivational teachings, and SAED (Skill Acquisition and Entrepreneurship Development) lectures. SAED involves skill acquisition trainings that include fashion designing/ tailoring, tie and dye, food processing, cosmetology, photography, ICT/ phone and computer repairs, automobile repairs, agro-allied, etc.

After the lectures, I went to collect my #1500 transport allowance and did so with ease as there was no queue. I proceeded to fill the 'book of life', a register where all corps members had to fill their basic information during which it began to rain heavily. A football match between platoon 2 and 9 was ongoing in the heavy rain which removed more parts of the already dilapidated pavilion roof where we took shelter.

I waited till the rain subsided and went for dinner. I decided to eat in the multi-purpose hall and saw some OBS members. I asked one of them, Joanne whether there was a meeting and she told me about the night's dance and drama competition taking place between platoon 9 and 10 which she will be participating in. From this, other discussions followed and I discovered she was already a published writer. I asked her few other questions and decided to interview her in one of my shows at OBS.

I went to my hostel and prepared my final draft of my platoon's morning meditation (a short talk that teaches life lessons), wrote some interview questions and went to bed.

#nysc #corper #abia_corper

AN ABIA CORPER'S MEMOIR
EPISODE TEN: MY FIRST SHOW
Tuesday, 1st August, 2017

After breakfast, we went for SDG (Sustainable Development Goals), Nigerian Institute of Management (NIM), motivational-entrepreneurial lectures and ICPC lecture on corruption. The lectures lasted for about five hours and its coming to an end was a relief to everyone as many were already exhausted due to the short sleep and morning drills. I went to the OBS building for my show and Funky, Zuby and I (the CEO) ran the show.

The evening parade was interesting and very challenging with our ever-strict platoon instructor acting stricter as we learnt more advanced parade routines such as wheeling. I went to the OBS office after the parade for the evening show where Funky and I ran another show. The show didn’t last as it was supposed to because of the inter-platoon cultural dance and drama competition between platoon 7 and 8 that was soon to take place at the multi-purpose hall. By the time I went for dinner around 8pm, the food was already finished and those of us who had not eaten were told to come back by 9pm as they just started cooking another food.

I went to mammy to get some oranges as I have always done whenever I have stomach upset or indigestion and wanted to relax in my hostel for some time before attending the evening's dance and drama competition but the soldiers came to chase everyone out so they would attend the competition. This, I believe was in response to the low turn-out experienced last night.

I watched the performers and was impressed by two things, first - the presentation, and second, their improvised costumes made with just available materials in camp. I went back for food but lost interest in it as we were given rice as opposed to the beans and potato porridge served earlier.

#nysc #corper #abia_corper

AN ABIA CORPER'S MEMOIR
EPISODE ELEVEN: THE REFUSAL
Wednesday, 2nd August, 2017

I woke up around 03:30am intending to get ready for the day but felt so tired and cold. I went back to bed only to wake up some minutes to five. I was just dressing up when the bugle blew for the morning parade. After the camp director's address, platoons 1, 2 and 3 went to the multipurpose hall for their lectures (other platoons had theirs subsequently on different days). We were lectured on national orientation and national core values. We were also given a drug lecture by a representative of the NDLEA.

Just before the lectures began, my platoon leader, Oghormena (a fellow corps member) gave me the morning meditation to be taken by my platoon the next day prepared by someone else to copy into a more presentable sheet. I read it and discovered the writer drifted from the topic and told Oghor about it. I declined in writing it because I won't feel comfortable writing what I knew was wrong. I know you're thinking I declined because I wasn't the writer but that's certainly not the case. I am a result-oriented person and don't care who gets a required job done, whereas the writer's name will not be mentioned when it is read. I had even refused to write something every of my course mates wrote in their practical report book while in school (though everyone knew it was wrong) and had to submit mine like that because I wasn’t comfortable writing it. Oghor gave the write-up to someone else and that was how the issue of morning meditation ended.

We went for breakfast after which all platoons went to the hall for a general lecture on code of conduct of corps members. A representative of a PMP (Project Management Professional) and HSE (Health, Safety and Environment) training organization also addressed us concerning their training courses. Next, we headed for our various SAED classes and I joined the agro-allied class. We were taught aquaculture, taking catfish as a case study and also poultry farming with a focus on broilers. The class ended around 4pm when the bugle blew for the evening parade.

#nysc #corper #abia_corper

AN ABIA CORPER'S MEMOIR
EPISODE TWELVE: THE ROUTINE
Thursday, 3rd August, 2017

I woke up by past 2am, got out and found no one outside, so I went back to sleep only to wake up by past 4am. How come I didn’t hear my alarm ring by 3am? I had planned to do my laundry this morning and here I was having less than one hour to wash my clothes, white shoe, take my bath and prepare for parade. I however, went ahead with my laundry plan (those drycleaners will not 'eat' my money) and still finished on time. I do dry my white floater shoe with one of my clothes I converted to a rag that’s why I could still wear it for the morning parade.

The morning routine (what I generally call morning parade) started as usual with praise and worship, Christian and Muslim prayers, the national anthem, Abia state anthem, morning meditation, morning news and camp director's address. Special announcements from the state coordinator or other officials follow at times. Man o' war drills and practicing of parade routines follow and we go for breakfast. Let me talk about today's morning meditation since it was taken by my platoon. I was happy with our presentation. Oghor gave it to Sarah, a fellow platoon member and she rewrote it, taking points from several write-ups, mine inclusive and the final product was better than what I wrote - the right thing was finally done.

Later in the day, my platoon had a meeting where we basically talked about contributing money that will be used for various inter-platoon competitions. The money will be used for buying of football and volleyball and maybe glucose for the sport participants, renting of dinner gowns, suits and shoes for Miss BBB, Mr. and Miss NYSC contestants and ingredients for the cooking competition.

During the even parade, the soldiers gave a demonstration of the complete parade routine we have been practicing for the closing ceremony and were greeted with a loud ovation as they paraded with ease and flawlessness. Our ever-strict, perfectionist platoon instructor (I really like him though) dealt with us as usual but it all ended well with him congratulating us and taking countless pictures with us.

#nysc #corper #abia_corper

AN ABIA CORPER'S MEMOIR
EPISODE THIRTEEN: MY PLATOON'S POOR PERFORMANCE
Friday, 4th August, 2017

I don’t know why I've been finding it difficult to wake up early these days. I woke up, went back to bed and finally woke up for preparation by some minutes to five. During the morning parade, we were given a certificate format form where we are to affix our passport and sign. It contains our basic information and we are to correct any misspellings in the names because that is how our names will appear on our NYSC discharge certificate.

We went for our SAED classes and were taught piggery and artificial insemination in catfish in the agro-allied class which I belonged to. The lectures were cut short because of the Jumat service that is to take place in the mosque from 12 to 2pm. I later went for the OBS meeting where we discussed about leaving a legacy by doing something tangible for the OBS. After lunch, I put on my 7/7 for the man o' war drills but it didn’t hold because of the heavy downpour that even drenched the clothes I washed the day before. I also went to collect my local transportation (bicycle) allowance of #1000 when there was no queue.

The evening parade did not hold also and I began to feel like I was wasting time, I tried to sleep but couldn’t. So, I asked around for a book and got 'the big picture' by Ben Carson. In the evening, I went for the cultural dance and drama competition in the multipurpose hall and my platoon will be competing.

To cut the long story short, I was not impressed by my platoon's performance especially in the dance; there was no organization, coordination and adequate preparation, even though I appreciate the efforts of the participants. My platoon has always been nonchalant toward activities including the parade. So, I made up my mind to put in my best in the debate I will be participating in and went to my hostel to commence preparation that night.

On getting back to the hostel, a room crammed with 180 corps members, having only one door, no fan and one-person walkways as the only available space. Thank God for the cold weather, else we would wake up half cooked from the heat that would have resulted. The hostel was very noisy as usual and this continued till midnight when I slept with those singing in snores and farting while sleeping (we ate beans and potato that night) been the main topic of discussion.

#nysc #corper #abia_corper

AN ABIA CORPER'S MEMOIR
EPISODE FOURTEEN: MISS BBB COMPETITION
Saturday, 5th August, 2017

It began to rain during morning devotion, so we had to go to the multipurpose hall. The camp director continued her address she began earlier on the parade ground. She talked about the NCCF, Catholic and Muslim associations been the only recognized religious bodies on camp, reiterated that relocation is only permitted on marital and health grounds and that we should not rewrite our destiny by lobbying for posting which she said is impossible anyway. We were given a short talk about our Primary Place of Assignment (PPA) and later went out for sanitation exercise where we were given polythene gloves with each platoon given an area to take care of.

After breakfast, we went for lectures on responsibe drinking (Drink IQ) and SDG and were taught about business plan. Later on, we went for family meeting where our platoon officer advised us on how to utilize our service year, answered our questions and also talked about the social activities in camp. When he left, we (platoon members) came together to discuss on how to move the platoon forward and I noticed that everyone comported themselves and showed keen interest in the prosperity of the platoon, certainly because of our poor performance last night.

Tonight's event is Miss BBB and the OBS crew prepared the multipurpose hall for the event. The pageant finally began around 08:30pm and the hall was filled beyond capacity. In their first outing, each contestant came out on white vests and shorts, paraded and danced on the stage. They were tagged with letters in a random order so as to conceal the identity of each platoon representative. Before the second outing, there was a break where recording artistes and a dancer (all corps members) performed on stage to entertain the audience.

The contestants came on stage on dinner gowns and were asked questions pertaining NYSC by picking a number. The results were announced and there was an uproar, some of celebration, others of unfair judgment. In my own opinion, the winner definitely merited it as she was the biggest, wowed the audience and answered her questions correctly, though I have reservations about some of the decisions taken by the judges. The winner was awarded a refrigerator, first runner-up - a microwave and the second runner-up - a standing fan. Consolation prices of the sponsors (Hero lager beer) were given to other contestants.

After the official closing of the event, music blared from the speakers and there was energetic dancing and picture taking greater than that of the welcome party till about 10:30pm - the second time light out was exceeded in camp.

#nysc #corper #abia_corper

AN ABIA CORPER'S MEMOIR
EPISODE FIFTEEN: THE DEBATE
Sunday, 6th and Monday 7th August, 2017

I woke up around 7am feeling pains all over and went to the OBS building to get something. Fortunately for me, the generator was on and I utilized the opportunity to charge my phone that had been down since the previous day as I need it to prepare for the debate taking place the next day, Monday. I needed a lot of time on the topic my platoon was in support of: the rule of law is a hindrance to the fight against corruption in Nigeria. To cut the long story short, I continued my research on the topic until after lunch when interested platoon members came to discuss the topic till almost dinner. Andy, a fellow platoon member and I still waited after dinner until light out fine-tuning our points.

I woke up on Monday morning around 3am and continued working on the debate, writing out separately what each speaker will present and did some personal writings afterward. We went to the multipurpose hall after breakfast where we had lectures on leadership and were introduced to the Igbo language. We later went for SAED and were taught cattle rearing in the agro-allied class. Later in the evening, my debate partner, Andy and I began rehearsing until dinner.

The debate commenced by 8pm with two platoons going head-to-head against each other, giving a total of five debate sessions on different topics. It was really an exciting time as graduates engaged in erudite arguments. We were the fourth set of debaters and it was a heated battle between us and our opponents as one of the judges confirmed. The final debate, i.e. the one after ours caught my attention because of the last speaker. This guy had charisma and his presentation was flawless. If there was a best debater of the night, I believe he would be the one, so I decided to speak with him after the event.

At the end of the debate, one of the judges came on stage to correct our mistakes and rounded up the event by few minutes past ten.

#nysc #corper #abia_corper

AN ABIA CORPER'S MEMOIR
EPISODE SIXTEEN: THE TALENT HUNT SHOW
Tuesday, 8th August, 2017

During the morning devotion, the camp director made an announcement that one of the boys' hostel, Ochendo X1 (I stay in Ochendo X2) is the neatest and the girls' hostel is the dirtiest. She also announced the debate results and my platoon came third out of ten, our opponents took the first position. This was an improvement in my platoon's positions when compared to our position in previous activities. We took 5th in the recently held Miss BBB (though I believe we deserved higher), 9th in the drama and dance competition and didn't pass the first round in the volleyball and football competition.

We commenced parade, putting on our crested vest in anticipation of the arrival of the NYSC Director General. We later went for breakfast of beans and pap, and for the first time in my life, I put the pap directly on the beans because I didn’t want to relinquish my position on the queue by returning to the hostel to get my cup, and to my amazement, it tasted normal.

The representative of the DG finally arrived and was entertained with cultural displays, man o' war games and was saluted in our usual way by removing our head dress (cap). I chatted with some friends afterward and the discussion was on relationship (I know you want to hear about this but I won't tell you the details) and I got to see people's perspective on relationship issues.

Evening parade came and as usual, my platoon was not serious about it and we ended up not doing much. I later went to a part of the camp I had not been to where some platoon 3 members were rehearsing their dance for the next day's jeans carnival and cultural display, my platoon representing the Yoruba culture. I was not surprised at the gross lack of maintenance I saw there just like the other parts of the ten-year old facility.

After having dinner of a sacrifice-like meal of yam porridge (yam and oil), I went to the multipurpose hall for the evening's talent hunt show. The turnout was very poor, mainly because we were not forced outside, so the event was not as interesting as I envisaged. Corps members presented dance, comedy and drama. The event ended by past ten.

#nysc #corper #abia_corper

AN ABIA CORPER'S MEMOIR
EPISODE SEVENTEEN: THE JEANS CARNIVAL
Wednesday, 9th August, 2017

I went to the camp market to charge Sarah's power bank I had drained and guess who I saw there, Harley, the exceptional debater I told you about. We chatted for a while but I had to let him go because he was going to eat at a cafeteria.

The jeans carnival and cultural presentation was supposed to take place after lunch but thank God it rained as I had the opportunity to relax properly. Waking up, I put on my blue jean, white vest and sneakers. I got out and it was a colourful event as beautiful designs were printed on most corpers' vest. Beautifully designed hand-made and ready-made carnival masks adorned our faces and rich cultural attires of various cultures assigned to each platoon were worn by the cultural demonstrators. Each platoon went round the parade ground passing in front of the high table with the culture representatives taking the lead and the rest of the platoon following behind, chanting and singing in that culture.

For me, it was photograph galore as I took almost a hundred photos until my phone battery ran flat. The result for the cultural display was announced and platoon 5 won. They roared aloud with shouts of victory and marched round with the band to the camp market, stopping at strategic places to dance while the drums, trombone, trumpet and other musical instruments played in concert.

I went to Harley's hostel after dinner and met him with his friend, Kelechi (he also debated for his platoon) who recognized me because he was among those I interviewed few nights before. We talked basically about writing, books and Harley's debate and I was enlightened. The talk was more like an interview as I asked most of the questions while Harley and Kelechi answered. After about an hour of discussion, I took my leave and ran to my hostel as it was already raining.

#nysc #corper #abia_corper

AN ABIA CORPER'S MEMOIR
EPISODE EIGHTEEN: THE INTER-PLATOON PARADE COMPETITION
Thursday, 10th August, 2017

After morning devotion, the PRO (Public Relations Officer) told all OBS crew members to wait behind. He was very angry with us because only few crew members carried out their responsibilities in OBS, leaving the work for a few and he collected our OBS tags. I believe the reason why some joined OBS is because they don’t want to partake in the parade since that was the orientation I got before orientation camp but not why I joined.

The meeting ended and we went for lectures on INEC and YEDP (Youth Empowerment Development Project) after which we went for SAED exhibition. At the exhibition, all the different classes showcased their materials and what they produced during the five-day skill acquisition training. Dignitaries attended the event and went round the various SAED stands where corpers explained to them what they had learnt. During the exhibition, I finally met Joanne since the last time we met and used the opportunity to ask her questions concerning her work as a writer and she gladly provided all the information I needed.

When the exhibition was coming to an end, I went to my hostel to do some laundry, the first time I will wash in the afternoon, since that’s the time others’ buckets will be empty as mine was stolen from right under my bed a few days ago. While washing, the people paying 'alawee' (monthly allowance of #19800) came to pay us in cash and this brought about an 'infinity-sized' queue, so I didn't collect mine today.

The inter-platoon parade competition came up a few hours later. It was a colourful event as we all put on our crested vest which accentuated the uniformity of the parade routine exhibited by each platoon. It was a stressful event for the participants as they had to stand for an extended period of time and two corpers fainted, including one from my platoon.

In every competition, there must be a winner and to my astonishment, no platoon exceeded a score of 50% as given by the judges. Platoon 10 came out first while my platoon took the fourth position. The top three platoons carried their instructors and a song of victory played from the loud speakers.

#nysc #corper #abia_corper

AN ABIA CORPER'S MEMOIR
EPISODE NINETEEN: MY THOUGHTS

Let me at this juncture give my impression about the orientation camp with all I have seen thus far. I will begin with the meals. Within the first few days we arrived camp, the meals were okay quantity-wise (I am a light eater) and manageable quality-wise. But later, there was a drastic decline in both quantity and quality and coming relatively late (though within the time allotted for meal) is almost tantamount to not getting food or getting it in drops. I had been given tasteless rice without meat, I complained to the server and she said I was not even happy I got rice, you can imagine how graduates are treated for something the federal government has paid for. I had also been given small, oiled yam that could as well be mashed for baby food, tea that could pass for sweetened herbs, meats that could be mistaken for seasoning cubes (they are that small even though they were not even fried), etc.

Next are the amenities in Abia camp. The first thing I (or anyone else) noticed is the lack of maintenance culture. I was surprised to know the facility was just ten years old. The pavilion roof looked like poorly done thatched roof, the multipurpose hall leaks when it rains, even on the stage, the water tanks (even though few) were all opened, I stopped drinking the water when I noticed this. I don’t know whether the bathrooms were designed to retain the bathing water as you have to sweep thoroughly after bathing, so most of us bathe outside, there is not even a tap around the bathroom or toilet area, you have to walk some distance before you can get or even buy water, the toilet does not have an outlet for waste water and the list goes on. Something really has to be done about the camp facility because I wonder what it will look like in a few years’ time.

You want to know what I feel about the behaviour of corps members since we are all graduates? I am challenged by the behaviour, experience and intellect of some and those are the ones I mingle with and try as much as possible to learn something from. But there are those I just imagine what they look like. For example, those who don’t flush the toilet, the one who took the bottle of water I wanted to brush my teeth with and returned it empty, the one who stole my bucket from right under my bed. There are others I know like the ones who don’t take correction, the one who was proud of stealing someone else's bucket of water, the guy who is always drunk every time of the day, those who don’t want to queue and behave like it's their right and the list goes on. Sometimes I wonder whether we are all graduates.

#nysc #corper #abia_corper

AN ABIA CORPER'S MEMOIR
EPISODE TWENTY: THE MOST ANTICIPATED EVENT IN CAMP
Friday, 11th August, 2017

This morning's man o' war drills were the best ever. We jogged round camp clapping and singing and finally settled to play different exercising games. Next, we did an intra-platoon race competition where those to represent platoon 3 for the inter-platoon race competition were selected. After breakfast, I had my longest siesta in camp, it lasted for about 3 hours (by this time, the race competition was ongoing). I woke up, went for lunch and collected my #19800 allowance without stress as there was no queue.

It was announced that those who missed their man o' war drills should come for theirs. I had missed it because my platoon had theirs on the debate day while Andy and I were preparing. This is an experience I do not want to miss because I may not have it again (remember I intend to make every moment count). I didn’t plan to take photographs because phones were not allowed for taking photos but ended up taking 19 photos worth #3800 (I know this was an irrational decision but it felt good). The drills involved navigating various obstacles and climbing ropes. Some of the gadgets used include tunnel, pigeon hole, Jacob's ladder, Scramble net, 6 and 12 feet wall, gorilla bridge, etc. I will say this was my most interesting experience in camp.

Fast forward to evening to the most anticipated event in camp - the Mr. and Miss NYSC competition. The multipurpose hall was already filled even before the show started. It was beautifully decorated and a different and better sound system provided by the sponsor (Nigerian Breweries) was used. The show kick-started around 08:35pm with the contestants labeled A to J coming out in pairs (male and female) as white fowls in their immaculate white attires. Comedians, artistes and a dancer performed while the contestants changed into their evening wears.

The evening wears were glamorous, the men wore perfectly tailored suits, sparkling wristwatches and shoes that reflected the camera flashlights descending on them. The ladies wore flowing dinner gowns (some even cleaning the tiled stage), glittering necklaces, earrings and bracelets and their flawless made-up faces seemed too good to be true. I wondered how the judges would make their decisions because I would have been confused if I were one.

After parading and queuing up on stage, each pair of contestants came forward to dance as R & B songs emanated from the huge, black, loud speakers; you are not human if you don’t feel the emotion and excitement in the air. They went back to their positions on the stage posing elegantly and smiling throughout while they provided answers to the questions they picked randomly. Other set of performers came up stage while the results were collated with the crowd cheering and anxiously waiting for the results.

The results were finally announced and platoon 8 contestant became Mr. NYSC while the Miss NYSC crown went to platoon 9 contestant. The top three contestants were presented with gifts such as microwave, LCD TV, refrigerator, etc. Next was dance, dance, dance and the dj played the right party jamz as evidenced in the roars of fun as each track is changed. The soldier blowing the bugle came into the hall to blow for light out because it was already past eleven but the bugle sound seemed to add flavour to the music as the shouting and dancing intensified. The dj finally stopped playing by 11:22pm and everyone dispersed. What a night!

#nysc #corper #abia_corper

Wow! nice write up... I'm currently serving in Abia state l8Ci

Sarpyro1:
Wow! nice write up... I'm currently serving in Abia state l8Ci

Thanks. Which LGA? I served in Obingwa

Aba south LGA

AN ABIA CORPER'S MEMOIR
EPISODE TWENTY-ONE: THE COOKING COMPETITION
Saturday, 12th August, 2017

OBS crew members went to the OBS building to sort NYSC ID cards into the ten platoons, after which I had breakfast. I had my siesta and went to my platoon's stand to assist in the cooking competition. We brought chairs and tables to our canopy, fetched water, bought firewood, got cooking utensils from the kitchen and also rented some. Each platoon was given about a quarter bag of rice (about 217 members in a platoon), raw meat, about 1.75 liters of groundnut oil and some other ingredients. What we were given was obviously not enough, so we went to purchase more cooking materials (including rice) needed for the cooking using the money we contributed.

Other platoons had started cooking or at least making fire, washing meat, etc. but nothing had begun in my unserious but interesting platoon until few minutes to 4pm. We started cooking and everyone wanted to be the chief cook with some complaining about the method of others but it was fun as we progressed and everything fell into place. My platoon prepared what we were given, i.e. rice and noodles given to us by Tummy Tummy noodles. To my surprise, some other platoons included various types of soups and 'swallows' but I wasn’t bothered because I thought we were not going to be judged for other meals.

Then came an issue with the jollof rice we were preparing, it was not evenly cooked, it was a mixture of well cooked and fairly cooked rice. The group who wanted the rice to be parboiled started to blame the other group that insisted that parboiling was not necessary but washing with hot water. It was finally resolved as we came to the conclusion that the various kinds of rice used may have caused this, whereas the bottom was well cooked and that's what will be presented to the judges.

The meals were finally ready and all platoons took their delicacies to their canopies now on the parade ground to present them on well decorated tables. My platoon prepared a three course meal of fruit salad as appetizer, jollof rice garnished with diced liver and fried meat as main meal and noodles prepared with eggs, vegetables and beef for dessert. Peanuts, fruit juice, canned drinks, bottled water, cutleries and empty plates were also neatly arranged on the table. The tasting started and the judges tasted all the meals including the soups I told you about and went away with everything on each table. While this was going on, loud music played from the speakers on the elevated stage brought by the sponsors (Sminorff) while corps members were dancing and having fun. Various musical performances took place and it was more than a cooking competition, it was a party - the last party in camp.

The results were announced, platoon 1 took the 1st position while platoon 10 took 10th (what a coincidence!) even though they prepared various soups. At least, platoon 3 didn’t take the last position in any competition, though we didn’t take first either. The party was taken to the next level and there was more than enough food to go round. Beautiful Sminorff ladies dressed in all black gave mixed drinks in disposable cups to all that cared for and the party progressed despite the rain. It all came to an end when the bugle blew by past ten.

#nysc #corper #abia_corper

AN ABIA CORPER'S MEMOIR
EPISODE TWENTY-TWO: THE LAST SUNDAY
Saturday, 13th August, 2015

It's the last Sunday in camp. I resolved to do my last camp laundry since we will be leaving on Tuesday. Two issues arose; the first was getting two empty buckets (mine had been stolen) and getting a place to spread the washed clothes since a lot of people wash on Sundays, but that didn’t deter me anyway. I finished washing, took my breakfast and went to church. Today's service was a special one as new executives of the fellowship, NCCF were inaugurated. The new executives were called out and prayed for with two of my university school mates, Samuel and Tessy as part of them. The service ended as usual with the NCCF family song.

I had my siesta, took lunch and continued looking for the book I forgot at our stand the night before. I went to the OBS building to ask whether it has been found or get it announced over the camp radio and got into some conversations that kept me there for some time. I later relaxed on one of the beds and started thinking of how far God has brought me and couldn’t help but thank Him. He has been keeping me and I'll be a year older tomorrow and that is a testimony. I chatted with some friends after dinner and went to bed before 9pm, my earliest bedtime in camp.

#nysc #corper #abia_corper

AN ABIA CORPER'S MEMOIR
EPISODE TWENTY-THREE: MY BIRTHDAY
Monday, 14th August, 2017

The saying, "early to bed, early to rise" proved true this morning as I woke up past 2am feeling well rested. I went online to post "Happy Birthday to me" on Facebook and saw a video and two photos sent to me by a friend, Kevwe wishing me happy birthday and they served as my Instagram posts. On the parade ground, fellow platoon members wished me happy birthday and online friends did likewise. Today almost went sour as I continued looking for the misplaced book almost all afternoon but couldn’t find it.

Later on, the state coordinator addressed us in the multipurpose hall and awarded exceptional camp officials and corps members such as the parade commander. Both the OBS crew and the sanitation police presented the items bought for the camp to the state coordinator. Nothing else worthy of note happened all afternoon (today of all days, you can imagine!). It has been a boring birthday and the only thing I hoped on to eliminate the boredom is what will take place tonight at OBS.

The time finally came for the OBS get-together and chairs were arranged round a straight, long array of tables in front of the OBS building. The studio instruments were brought outside and a show where people called in to make a shout-out was done. The event started proper with a short introduction of ourselves and a birthday song was sang when it was my turn to introduce myself. Next, the PRO addressed us, appreciated us for the work done and even said we are the best OBS crew he has ever worked with. The time for refreshment came and we were served chicken suya and malt drinks, though someone brought rum that was also shared among those interested. We danced and the curtain for the get-together was drawn.

I went straight away to mammy market after the get-together because I heard it was fun the night before as evidenced in the increased noise-making that tormented me before going to bed last night. I got there and there were more bottles on tables than usual with corps members and soldiers sharing tables, everywhere was filled and you could tell that tonight is a special one, the last night in camp.

#nysc #corper #abia_corper

Get ready for the last episode ...

Umunna bende ppl! !!!

AN ABIA CORPER'S MEMOIR
EPISODE TWENTY-FOUR: THE POSTING
Tuesday, 15th August 2017

I woke up by past 2am to do my final packing. When I went out to brush my teeth around 3am, I was surprised at the number of people I saw outside, 3am has become the new 5am. I went to get water and met a long queue with only two taps running at low pressure indicating that the water remaining won't go round. Disagreement erupted here and there until power was restored and I finally fetched water after queuing for about 30 minutes.

I took my luggage to the OBS building after dressing up and again saw a longer queue at the point where beds were returned in order to get accommodation clearance, so I didn’t return my bed until later when the queue had diminished. I took breakfast of bread and tea, chatted with some friends and relaxed until the closing ceremony began proper with the late arrival of the representative of the State Governor.

The ceremony came to an end and we all went to our various platoon officers for our posting letters. Isiala-Ngwa has been the most talked about LGA because of rumours of them eating humans, so many were praying not to be posted there. I got my posting letter and realized I was posted to Emmanuel Group of Schools, Ohanze, Obingwa LGA and a strange fear-like feeling came over me. I didn’t anticipate such feeling because I was willing to go anywhere, Isiala-Ngwa inclusive. I have always believed I can have fun and an interesting experience anywhere.

The last bus to Obingwa LGA which I boarded left by past 3pm and for the first time in the last 21 days, I was out of camp, out of the regimented lifestyle and now on the streets of Abia state. It has been a wonderful, once-in-a-lifetime experience but as my version of the saying goes, "nothing lasts forever, even Hausa perfume".

THE END

#nysc #corper #abia_corper

Thanks for reading.

Compliments of the season.