To whom it may concern

We, the Mosquitoes Association of Nigeria (MAN), the sender (hereinafter referred to as the suckers/complainants and where the context so admit include our personal representatives and/or assigns) on the part wish to, in a special way, convey our complaint to you the recipient (hereinafter referred to as the Suckee and where the context so admit include our personal representative and/or assigns) on the other part.

Without prejudice to the forgoing and for the avoidance of doubt, our collective position herein relates to recurring use of SNIPER by some our Suckees for suicide.

We, the ever-dogged members of MAN, strongly detest the use of SNIPER by depressed suckees in achieving their suicidal mission. However, we do not support a ban on SNIPER as we already have the technic of surviving this deadly substance and we would not want a new introduction of any substance unfamiliar to MAN.

We, therefore, call on all relevant authorities to discourage depressed or frustrated suckees from using SNIPER for suicidal missions. Other available options as suggested by MAN include: jumping from 3rd Mainland Bridge, hugging transformer, drinking of fuel at any gas station etc.

Thanks for your co-operation and immense understanding.
Sign under the seal dated this day of the High Chief Justice Anopheles 3/1/2019 before the Commissioner for Public Complaint Commission.

The summons to this complaint is taken out on the name of Dr. Ades Anophelous, whose address for service for Public Relation is in Lagos, NIGERIA.

Happy New Year!

Suicide is Not an OPTION.

Not funny at all