₦airaland Forum

Patronizing olosho: it all started when I was in secondary school jss2 can remember vividly a not too close friend of mine introduced me to a local brothel. That day I got disvirgin ever since then, I have been patronizing olosho up till this moment. I haven't had a girlfriend since I was born, just pay as you go.. I spend huge sums, like 40k a night.. 20k short time, like 5 days in a week. I am dying within me. I can't seem to stop.



Gambling: this has been eating me since 2017, but it has been getting worse since 2020. Every money I make I put it into sporty bet. I can't seem to stop, it's almost like I'm being manipulated. Just this year alone I have lost close to millions of naira. I think I am curse. I am dying deep within me. I can't seem to stop.



Masturbation: due to depression, I started masturbating in early 2020 up till now, even when I'm with a runs gal I still masturbate. It has become a habit that I can't seem to stop. I am dying deep within me.





Drugs intake: I was introduced to drugs by a runs gal I carried in 2019. I still remember that day. Now I take drugs like it's water in my system. I'm depressed, I turn to drugs..when I lose in sportybet I turn to drugs then I masturbate.. I logde hotel just to take drugs. I'm so skinny.. people are starting to complain. I know, but I can't seem to stop. I'm dying deep within me.



I have contemplated suicide several times but I haven't made up my mind to end it yet because I know just snipper will end this. I still have hope, but I don't know how to redirect my life. I have tried and tried, I don't know how. I tried to enroll myself in a rehab and booked an appointment with them but they didn't talk well . I am dying..I need help.

Please, I need help.



I have told my mom about this she should pray for me. I am ready to go to church, herbalist, shrine or mosque to reconstruct my life.
I can't help myself.
Everytime I try to stop just 24hours I relapse the next day.

I wish I can just die.
Every night I sleep and wish not to wake up because once I do I know it's same suffering.
I am like a living corpse that's breathing but dying with great pace. I might just take my life but I wish I can survive.


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