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:) - Family - Nairaland

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My Wife Is A Good Woman But Hates Sex After Marriage / ‘My Wife Is Killing Me With Having Too Many Children, She Bears Them Like Rats’ / My Wife Is Not What I Thought Before We Got Married: I Want To Divorce (2) (3) (4)

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:) by Newbreed2018: 1:39pm On Feb 20, 2019
Deleted. Thanks all.
Re: :) by daddytime(m): 1:42pm On Feb 20, 2019
Hmmm

Keep talking...admonishing and showing love...she'd be fixed soon.

This kind woman just tell her say her character dey push you to find another woman outside and then make her feel that third force for real...maybe her head go correct.

1 Like

Re: :) by ogawisdom(m): 1:44pm On Feb 20, 2019
cool

The root cause is her upbringing and home training, she may have been over pampered while growing up with her parents condoning alot of nonsense character from her.

You cant really retrain her especially as she appears not to be respectful to you as u continues to over pamper her like her parents did.

Must u drop her in her office especially when she is nonchalant about going late and her money being deducted?

She shows traits of a spoilt child, u have to reduce the pampering or she will get worse. Be assertive and firm.

Say something like honey I will stop dropping you off to work and u will be going on your own if u don't get dressed before 6am, if she fails to keep to time then be firm n stop dropping her off. Let her go late n be penalized in the office.

Women are like children if u over pamper a child he will disobey and be disrespectful to you. Once u are strict and firm they will learn their lessons

6 Likes

Re: :) by mejai(m): 1:56pm On Feb 20, 2019
The storms on nairaland are gathering. By d tym dey r done giving u advice, u will be confused.

1 Like

Re: :) by chiommy123(f): 2:09pm On Feb 20, 2019
Calmly talk to her as shouting and being rude to her can bring out the worse characters

1 Like

Re: :) by Moferere: 2:10pm On Feb 20, 2019
So, you come here and expose your wife's imperfections? You deserve a slap

Re: :) by MightySparrow: 2:26pm On Feb 20, 2019
ignoring her could be an answer

1 Like

Re: :) by lilmax(m): 2:46pm On Feb 20, 2019
this is what happens when you care too much.... too much pampering

IGNORE

1 Like

Re: :) by maxinvile(m): 3:15pm On Feb 20, 2019
From experience, your revelation has shown that is her person and nothing or little you can do about it. That is the way she is wired, presently I am having issues with mine, she doesn't call when she travelled, she only does want she feels like and mostly go against my wishes even when I discuss with her. One of the major challenges is about her transfer to my location which is possible and permitted by her place of work but refused to apply for it. This is a fresh marriage. Presently I reside in Lagos and she is in Abuja as paramilitary personnel. This narrative is to make you understand many people have such or are presently experiencing such.
For now, be patient with her and dont show her any form of love.
Be firm in your decisions.
Talk little with her.
You can also contact any of her family members for discussions.
After all these, no changes just know that you can't bend a full grown tree, take it as your cross.

2 Likes 1 Share

Re: :) by eyinjuege: 3:15pm On Feb 20, 2019
Why are you crying more than the bereaved in this case?
If she doesn't care about going to work late despite the deductions in her salary, why are you more concerned oga? You cannot love her more than she loves herself.
Let her start going when ever she's ready to, and possibly find her way.
No need for fight in this case

7 Likes

Re: :) by carammel(f): 3:55pm On Feb 20, 2019
Hear talk, you want to train her, she is your child right or your younger sister. undecided

1 Like

Re: :) by comtem2011: 4:03pm On Feb 20, 2019
eyinjuege:
Why are you crying more than the bereaved in this case?
If she doesn't care about going to work late despite the deductions in her salary, why are you more concerned oga? You cannot love her more than she loves herself.
Let her start going when ever she's ready to, and possibly find her way.
No need for fight in this case
I wonder o.

2 Likes 2 Shares

Re: :) by Oyindidi(f): 4:14pm On Feb 20, 2019
Na devil daughter you marry?

Yeye dey smell, watin you go gain for this yeye post? Ball-less men everywhere
Re: :) by comtem2011: 4:15pm On Feb 20, 2019
Train up your wife? Is she your sister or ur child?
You can only correct her and that correction must be with love. Not commanding her to dance to your tune.
I'm not saying you should be too lenient with her but every correction must not be with a commanding tone.

At least, you have ruled out extra marital affair, so pls try and adjust.

Issue of leaving the house early because of her, allow her to find her square root. Let her spend transport money from that salary after late coming deduction..
No one will teach her to adjust.

2 Likes

Re: :) by ImaIma1(f): 4:51pm On Feb 20, 2019
She sounds like a non challant person rather than stubborn. She has an unserious attitude towards things that she should take seriously.

Talking might not yield much. She might need to go through a very bad situation for her to change. At that point, no one will have to tell her to change. All I can say is pray for her and try not to allow her attitude bother you much

2 Likes 1 Share

Re: :) by Nobody: 6:49pm On Feb 20, 2019
She will not change for good.
Re: :) by zed7: 6:52pm On Feb 20, 2019
It's a personality thing. There is little or nothing you can do bro, there are lot's of people like that, they don't take life too seriously. But didn't you notice this before marriage? Carry your cross bro.

1 Like

Re: :) by dayleke: 7:18pm On Feb 20, 2019
Patience, bro,
Patience.

Do you have kids?
As in , who gets d kids ready in d morning?
Re: :) by Nobody: 7:24pm On Feb 20, 2019
So you want to divorce her
Well probably ignore her, or more preferably carry your cross, didn't you know what you said on the alter when you said I do? Anyway talk to her about your inconveniences, say it at any available chance especially when she's in a good mood! Use all those tactics and don't stop loving her.
Re: :) by Newbreed2018: 7:28pm On Feb 20, 2019
dayleke:
Patience, bro,
Patience.

Do you have kids?
As in , who gets d kids ready in d morning?
We have a house help who does that. And the school bus comes to pick up our daughter to school.
Re: :) by dayleke: 7:35pm On Feb 20, 2019
Newbreed2018:
We have a house help who does that. And the school bus comes to pick up our daughter to school.

Okay.
Just have patience bro.
There are some things you just have to leave alone. You can't do more than you have done. You don't wanna develop HBP on top of that. If your enemy kpeme today, life goes on for her.

If she wanted to change, she would have changed by now especially since money is being deducted from her salary for tardiness.

Listen to music while you waiting for her in the car or tune in to your favorite radio station.
Re: :) by Newbreed2018: 7:36pm On Feb 20, 2019
Thanks all for ur wonderful advice. I'm grateful.
Re: :) by dayleke: 7:38pm On Feb 20, 2019
OP.
Your tone of voice when talking to ur spouse also matters.
Don't let it be in an authoritative or superior voice but more like an advice to a loved one.
I'm not saying that's what you did o.

1 Like

Re: :) by GAZZUZZ(m): 8:40am On Sep 24, 2019
so many family issues. I understand

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