THE GOLDEN RULES OF BORROWING MONEY FROM YOUR FRIENDS AND FAMILY MEMBERS (PART 1)

The first golden rule to successfully borrow money from either your friend or family member is,

'don't talk to them only when you want to borrow money but always familiarize with them and seek for their continued success also. '

For you to receive from God, you need to talk to him and abide by some principles. Also, to borrow from bank, you need to first be their customer by opening and maintaining an account with them.

I've seen people complain of friends and family members who don't relate with them well but run to them to borrow money every time.

Love your friends and family genuinely. Ask them how their family and business fare. Ask and advise them on how their business or career can improve. You should also ask them for business and career advice to upgrade yourself. Reply their chats. Pick their calls. You should call them also. Sometimes, visit them, eat and play with them. Don't just show up only when you want to borrow.

Bottom Line: Consistent relationship/familiarity matters in borrowing and lending. Let's all imbibe this orientation.


Written by:

Femi Owoeye (Managing Consultant, Owofem Solutions and Global Services)

Don't take your relatives for granted.

Your points are valid

THE GOLDEN RULES OF BORROWING MONEY FROM YOUR FRIENDS AND FAMILY MEMBERS (PART 2)

Few weeks ago, I posted on this topic. I wanted to leave it at the only rule which suggests friends and family members constantly maintain good relationship with one another for effective borrowing and lending. After then, two other pivotal and unmissable rules quickly came to my mind. In this short part 2, I will say something on rule 2.


RULE 2: Don't see it as abnormal if that your friend/family member who chooses to lend you the money asks for what you want to use the money for. We should remember that God wants us to be clear, direct and straight-forward when making our requests known to Him. In the same manner, bank will always request a loan proposal from you if it's just 10k you want to borrow from them. In the proposal, they expect you to succinctly state your main purpose for the loan.

At this juncture, it should be clear that we should not be too secretive about the purpose of money you want to borrow. It's like trying to hide from someone who wants to help you out from a problem. That may end in a deadlock just like a pregnant woman in highly painful labour but who covers her private region from the available male doctor.

You can't want to borrow 100k or 500k from your friend or family member without wanting him/her to have knowledge of the purpose of the money so that he/she can be sure of the recovery of the loan. If they don't charge interest on the loan but only ask us whether the money is going into positive and legitimate activities, let's tell them.

Thank you!

You can't afford to miss the part 3 of this topic. Coming soon. Watch out!


OWOFEM

THE GOLDEN RULES OF BORROWING MONEY FROM YOUR FRIENDS AND FAMILY MEMBERS (PART 3)

It's a great opportunity if one doesn't have to go to bank but has a friend or family member who can lend one money when one urgently needs to complete a project. It's an opportunity because loans from friends and family members are usually interest-free whereas banks will break your spine with humongous interest rates regardless of the principal.

In part 1 of this series, it was stressed that you should constantly familiarize and relate with your friends and family members for easy borrowing and lending when situation calls for it. It's very hard to borrow from someone you don't call, visit, know his/her place, e.t.c. In part 2, it was also stressed that you shouldn't conceal the purpose of the loan from that your friend or family member especially if he/she asks for it. It's a universal principle and practice for a lender to ask for the purpose of a loan for him to be sure of the recovery of his money. Now, here is the rule 3.

RULE 3: Always determine and take all necessary steps to repay the whole loan value at the agreed time. Some people have frustrated their relatives and consequently discouraged them from lending because they did not pay back the money they borrowed. They abused their familiarity and therefore shut the door to future help from their frustrated friends and family members. Some people are so unscrupulous that they deliberately borrow huge sum of money from their close ones in order not to pay back or bastardize the money by not wanting to complete the repayment.

These 4 things happen when you deliberately don't want to repay or repay in full loans lent you by your close ones:

1. You frustrate and cause psychological damage to that your friend. If their trauma degenerates to a serious sickness/disease, they will always mention your name as the cause of their condition and that will ultimately embarrass and traumatize you as well.

2. You lose his/her trust. He will not trust you with other vital and sensitive things such as secrets, property, e.t.c.

3. Your chance of getting another significant loan from that person is very slim. He may reduce his lending to what he can afford to give you. If you default again, he will simply consider it as expected.

4. Your other close ones may hear about your high rate of loan default and consequently may not want to help you also.

In order to ensure that you disappoint your selfish instincts and repay every money you borrow from your close ones, always take these key steps:

a. Determine to repay from day one.

b. Be always conscious of the repayment as you spend money per time.

c. Maintain the cordial relationship that was there between you and that your friend(lender) before you borrowed the money. Once you lose contact with him for some time, you may be tempted to boycott repayment. So, keep communicating with him as usual.

Bottom Line: A friend that borrows today may be the one to lend tomorrow. Life is give-and-take and so is relationship. Respect principles and agreements.

Thank you for reading!

(Owofem, your life coach)

These principles are key!