IvarTheTerrible:


I remember facing a baying mob in 1992 close to Kalakuta Shrine..

A young lady had stolen baby formula because she was a school drop-out and had no one to rely on

A crowd of 5 unemployed youth were tearing her clothes when i ran to the scene


I jumped in front of her and used my shoulder to block a plank that was destined to flatten her head.

I quickly pulled off my shirt and trousers to cover her nudity when i recalled

my boxers were torn....they weren't my Xmas ones


The boys shouted on me to get out of the way so they would lynch her. I of course refused.

The touts started splashing petrol on us both....i was in my boxers and shivering that cold August morning.


I knew i had to take action or both me and the young lady would arrive Heaven /Hell in the next few seconds

Blood was rushing to my head, my body taut with the adrenaline surge.... i moved forward and headbutted the leader on the bridge of his nose

I pulled the nearest thug to me like i wanted to whisper to him and i grabbed a fistful of his balls and squeezed with all my strength.

The 3rd thug had a wolfish smile on his face, he struck the match and advanced ever so close....

To be continued....


Culled from "The Legendary Chronicles of Ivar"

IvarTheTerrible:
EPISODE 2

I remember saving a lady in distress in such a manner in 1997.

I was listening to Tupac & Biggie when..... next door I heard " I WILL KILL YOU TODAY" with a baby wailing loudly in the background.

I dashed to their house and slammed my shoulders against the door, breaking the lock. The whole place was turned upside down, furniture everywhere.

As soon as i could adjust my eyes to the dim lighting, i saw the woman cowering in the corner, baby in her arms and

her husband coming out with a gun ...

3 quick steps with my long legs and i flung myself across their small parlour like David De Gea saving a shot.

Several things happened at once - I saw the muzzle flash, heard the deafening bang & felt a hard punch to my chest

Just like an elephant kicked me. I was pushed into the woman's bosom pushing her off-balance.

She held me in her arms with her baby, blood was gushing from my chest..... i was wheezing




I then remembered the saying " If you hear a gunshot, you are not dead"

It turned out that i was lucky, the bullet had entered the metal whisky flask i kept in my breast pocket to drown my sorrows.

I looked up and i saw the murderous look in the husband's eyes....he was reloading.

To be continued


Culled from "The Legendary Chronicles of Ivar"

OnyeOgboni:


OnyeOgboni to his useless fagg0t father:Are you not a fool?please say no if you disagree?