This is another madness from police officers in charge of welfare at alakara police station Mushin, Lagos.

It was about a friend that is seriously having issue in marriage.

Fast forwarding, .....the matter was refer to police station at ilupeju and both were invited for interrogation... After the Interrogation, the husband was mandated to be performing his fatherly responsibility on his children which he didn't do and that the children shld be kept in wife custody till the matter be resolved.

The children are kept with the wife and wife family house and the family of the wife shoulder all the responsibility... While the marriage disharmony matter was going on , the wife got an opportunity to travel to South Africa for study...and she was advice by the school she applied for to come alone and keep the children with her mother, which she did.

The husband got the wind her movement to South Africa, and he started disturbing the family of the wife that they shld handover one of his children to him. He came with police officers from alakara police station to deliver an invitation letter to the wife's mother and the wife mother was invited for questioning....they allow the wife mother to go because she didn't come with the children.

Last week , the husband came alone to the wife's mothers shop in pretence of just playing with the daughter. Unknowing to the mothers wife, he has positioned a bike close to the shop... Immediately, he took the child and they left on a bike.

Despite his non-compliance to the terms of the welfare Officers at ilupeju police station , the husband charge the same case to Alakara police station... For me, this was a total mess and embarassment to the civility in the country.
The following are the allegations from alakara police station....(welfare department) headed by DMC Ibitoye..(Mrs)
That she left the children with the third party (i.e grandmother) and travel out
That she didn't take care of the children very well (which is untrue)
That she left the child playing around in the neighborhood.
Folks, I can tell you for free, the child attends one of the good school in Gbagada and she's been taking care of by a nanny without her father contributing to it. She lives with the granny in Gbagada in a good and comfortable environment. While the husband is squatting, have no meaningful source of income and his own mother stays in Badagry.

The wife came back yesterday to claim her daughter ...the police station refuse to release the daughter to the mothers despite her precarious conditions in police custody for over 1 week and some days...
The welfare Officer in alakara police station said they can only release the child to her on one condition that she signed an agreement which all what they wrote in the agreement was in favour of the husband that brought the case to this police.
It is crystal clear to the wife that the police officers is biased in their judgement and didn't consider any request from the wife stands...

I therefore use this opportunity to call on commissioner of police in Lagos State to Wade into this matter so that proper justice be done to dis issue.
The lady is tired all force of injustice and biasness and we condemned it in totality .....

But commissioner of police is not here on Nairaland!

This is a family/couples case.
No single element of court case self.

The case is too expensive for a third-party like you to handle.

The stories are not complete as well.

Maybe you need to say more or get a lawyer on their behalf pls. Better than this Nairaland

Agreement was for the wife to keep the children, not to hand them over to a third party. I don't understand why you think it's unfair for the husband to object to his wife giving his children to someone else.

The husband has a legitimate 50% interest in the children even if he is not as well to do as his wife's family. Every other third party's interest is residual and cannot come before that of the husband.

In the event that the mother cannot look after the children as a result of academic commitments, the husband should have first right to decide if he wants them back not the grand mother or any other third party.

I'm not holding brief for the police or the former husband, however you cannot prejudice the right of the father to take custody over his children when the mother is clearly too distant to do so. Many countries won't even allow a parent emigrate with a minor without the consent of the other spouse

Odetokun3:
But commissioner of police is not here on Nairaland!

But we will make him hear after someone posts the cops details and we all send him a link.

Alakara/ilupeju are both useless, irresponsible, THIEVES .They shhud take the mata to court/b4 Force HQ obalende and Ikeja.

budaatum:

But we will make him hear after someone posts the cops details and we all send him a link.

If your points are true and no hidden facts. Please get a lawyer.

To some extent, I never see police faults in this report. They are even trying to settle a case without court opinion.

Odetokun3:



If your points are true and no hidden facts. Please get a lawyer.

To some extent, I never see police faults in this report. They are even trying to settle a case without court opinion.

The wife has gotten a lawyer and the matter will be refer to court but the way the matter is being handled by the welfare officer in alakara police station calls for concern. It can happen to anyone.

The welfare Officer ask the wife to sign an agreement. all the points in the agreement is in favour of the husband.. there wasn't any aspect in the agreement about fulfilling fatherly responsibility on the child....or fatherly responsibility on the wife welfare.
This is injustice and biase...

eleko1:
Alakara/ilupeju are both useless, irresponsible, THIEVES .They shhud take the mata to court/b4 Force HQ obalende and Ikeja.

.... While social media battle is going on , then I will think of what next to do....

It can happen to anyone. Police officers always be fair in their Judgement... They don't have the absolute power

Glink2018:


The wife has gotten a lawyer and the matter will be refer to court but the way the matter is being handled by the welfare officer in alakara police station calls for concern. It can happen to anyone.

The welfare Officer ask the wife to sign an agreement. all the points in the agreement is in favour of the husband.. there wasn't any aspect in the agreement about fulfilling fatherly responsibility on the child....or fatherly responsibility on the wife welfare.
This is injustice and biase...

I will still advice you to be calm with the issue and follow due procedure in due time to avoid more damages please. God will take control.

Odetokun3:


I will still advice you to be calm with the issue and follow due procedure in due time to avoid more damages please. God will take control.

Yes. God will take control.

@OP A supposed mother abandoned her children in Nigeria to go and do Olosho work in South Africa and you still want to prevent the children father from having access to the children .

Are you okay at all ? It is obvious that the mother of the children does not put those kids as a priority otherwise she will not leave them with a thir party and travel out of the country.

For the father of the child to be able to abscond with the children while still in the custody of the mother shows that those kids are not properly supervised.

If those kids were important to the mother, she will not abandon them and travel to another country.

And for your information, the father of the children has 50% right on his kids, while non of the wives family including you has any right to the kids.

She should have informed the man before leaving her kids.
Well,what do i know?

calgaryFriend:
@OP A supposed mother abandoned her children in Nigeria to go and do Olosho work in South Africa and you still want to prevent the children father from having access to the children .

Are you okay at all ? It is obvious that the mother of the children does not put those kids as a priority otherwise she will not leave them with a thir party and travel out of the country.

For the father of the child to be able to abscond with the children while still in the custody of the mother shows that those kids are not properly supervised.

If those kids were important to the mother, she will not abandon them and travel to another country.

And for your information, the father of the children has 50% right on his kids, while non of the wives family including you has any right to the kids.

I can't join issue with you because your comments lack common sense and you just depicted your ignorance to the public.

you wrote an epistle to the story you don't have full picture of. What a waste!

You read about my comments that the Matter will be charged to court , you still carry your fragmented brain and your stunted fingers to still be typing trash and gibberish.



May the Lord deliver you from your foolishness.
Keep ranting like a rabid dog

Resurgent2016:
Agreement was for the wife to keep the children, not to hand them over to a third party. I don't understand why you think it's unfair for the husband to object to his wife giving his children to someone else.

The husband has a legitimate 50% interest in the children even if he is not as well to do as his wife's family. Every other third party's interest is residual and cannot come before that of the husband.

In the event that the mother cannot look after the children as a result of academic commitments, the husband should have first right to decide if he wants them back not the grand mother or any other third party.

I'm not holding brief for the police or the former husband, however you cannot prejudice the right of the father to take custody over his children when the mother is clearly too distant to do so. Many countries won't even allow a parent emigrate with a minor without the consent of the other spouse

So what is wrong with the terms you stated above? Is he not the father again?

Mr/Mrs well to do, he has 50% right and he comes first (before the wife's mother) when it comes to taking decisions as regards his children's welfare.

Know your rights and know the duty of the police. Since when is it the police duty to award custody and determine the issues of a child's welfare? This is referring to both ilupeju and alákàrà police stations. To determine what's best for the child go to a family court or department of social welfare not police.
Anyways what's my own. To resolve this either report to an higher officer or go to court..
Meanwhile I wouldn't blame the husband on 2 this.. A the police is not the competent authority to determine child custody. B. As long as a parent is alive and well, and except it can be shown that he is truly incompetent to cater for his children, then if the wife wants to travel he must take care of his children except otherwise is said by a competent authority

luxy44:


So what is wrong with the terms you stated above? Is he not the father again?

Mr/Mrs well to do, he has 50% right and he comes first (before the wife's mother) when it comes to taking decisions as regards his children's welfare.

Since you asked: these don't look right:

1. the mother initially seeking to take the child to another country with out obtaining the father's approval. According to the op, the father only "got wind of it". The situation is made worse by the fact that many Nigerians tend to over stay their study visas. That may as well have ended the relationship the father has with the children, and this happens a lot.

2. Notwithstanding the mother's best of intention for the children's welfare, it is wrong to transfer the custody of the child to a third party without getting the father's consent.

3. Implying that a third party should take custody because the father is poor (has no means of livelihood) is plain silly. If any 3rd party has any concern, they can offer their assistance without demanding custody of the child.

4. The op him/herself admitted that the father is poor and the mother's family has the wherewithal to carter for the child, then why so much insistence that the father must meet all financial obligations?

It looks to me as a rich family trying to muscle a poor man from playing an active role in his children's lives and hoping the police would do their bidding.

If you still see nothing wrong with 1 to 4, then I leave you with your opinion

Resurgent2016:


Since you asked: these don't look right:

1. the mother initially seeking to take the child to another country with out obtaining the father's approval. According to the op, the father only "got wind of it". The situation is made worse by the fact that many Nigerians tend to over stay their study visas. That may as well have ended the relationship the father has with the children, and this happens a lot.

2. Notwithstanding the mother's best of intention for the children's welfare, it is wrong to transfer the custody of the child to a third party without getting the father's consent.

3. Implying that a third party should take custody because the father is poor (has no means of livelihood) is plain silly. If any 3rd party has any concern, they can offer their assistance without demanding custody of the child.

4. The op him/herself admitted that the father is poor and the mother's family has the wherewithal to carter for the child, then why so much insistence that the father must meet all financial obligations?

It looks to me as a rich family trying to muscle a poor man from playing an active role in his children's lives and hoping the police would do their bidding.

If you still see nothing wrong with 1 to 4, then I leave you with your opinion

did you read in the comment that they are trying to muscle the husband? instead of of muscling the husband, the police officers are even doing the husband bidding...
as i speak now, they do not want the mother or her parent or her lawyer or any of the wife's family member to have access to the child...

save your dummy comment, the matter will be settle in family court as rightly said by one of the post...


it shall end in praise

luxy44:


So what is wrong with the terms you stated above? Is he not the father again?

Mr/Mrs well to do, he has 50% right and he comes first (before the wife's mother) when it comes to taking decisions as regards his children's welfare.

Number 1, i thought i mentioned the poster.

Number 2, we are on the same page.

Glink2018:


did you read in the comment that they are trying to muscle the husband? instead of of muscling the husband, the police officers are even doing the husband bidding...
as i speak now, they do not want the mother or her parent or her lawyer or any of the wife's family member to have access to the child...

save your dummy comment, the matter will be settle in family court as rightly said by one of the post...


it shall end in praise

We'll its good you realise you won't find sympathy for your mumu post online. Hopefully the courts will see the same.

luxy44:


Number 1, i thought i mentioned the poster.

Number 2, we are on the same page.

I'm always on the side of justice, fairness and openness...
now, is she not the mother of her dota again...
havent you read that no one is muscling anybody but instead the husband is using the police officer to do his bidding..
there is an allegation of child molestation and denial of his second child... please save your breathe , they will do justice to the matter in court...

irresponsible man should be taught a lesson... nobody have monopoly of wickedness

so save you breathe ... they we meet in court....

luxy44:


Number 1, i thought i mentioned the poster.

Number 2, we are on the same page.

noted, peace bro

She shouldn't have travelled and left her children with a 3rd party. Simple as ABC
She should have dropped the children with the father when she was travelling out, or gone with her children (with the permission of their dad of course).
Leaving her children with their grandma has shown she cannot be relied upon. Unless their father is a pedophile, a violent man, a drug user, she should have handed over the custody of those kids to him before her sojourn.

yeyeosoronga:
She shouldn't have travelled and left her children with a 3rd party. Simple as ABC
She should have dropped the children with the father when she was travelling out, or gone with her children (with the permission of their dad of course).
Leaving her children with their grandma has shown she cannot be relied upon. Unless their father is a pedophile, a violent man, a drug user, she should have handed over the custody of those kids to him before her sojourn.

I absolutely agree with you.
100%

I see no fault in the police's action, the lady is at fault, she should not have transferred custody with reaching an agreement with the father of the child.

This should be investigated

Mind your business.