this is no fiction. everything here is real.
As a young disadvantaged man living in a lagos Slum, fighting the dark forces of hate, Ignorance & illiteracy, religion, poverty, corruption, greed etc. you get to see or read certain things you may find disgusting unbelievable or even funny.
who knows when I would peck off. so let's have fun while at it
wherever you are in the world, reading this, every single thing here is True, nothing but the truth.

NB : Pls bear with my English.

let's start with this fvcktard called Tune /tu:ne/ .
Sick modafacker is ignorant, stupid and a silly pretender, not to me tho, I see right through his bullshit.
Tune's background.
Now in his mid to late 30s atleast, he grew up in another crazy part of lagos. Had a kid as a Youngster, abandoned the kid, doesn't give a sh!t. Tune is a Misogynistic semi-illiterate, dude laughs with you then says all manner of shit at your back. you know your community is Fvcked up if Somebody like Tune is liked by everybody, young and old. like he is a really popular guy

dude beat up his wife so bad that she stopped talking to him completely.
Tune sleeps with underaged girls, tells me how he disvirgins them. he thinks he his very intelligent, says he is a psychologist. knows better than the best of the best. one time he was telling me how the illuminati is controlling Nigerian Superstars and bigmen, how they got all the big guys in US, how they approached Dbanj, wizkid, Davido, Obafemi martins and forced them to join.He did a Google search and showed me the list of the top 10 illuminati members in Nigeria
"lol how are you sure this is accurate?" I asked. He looked at me in shock then screamed "shey Google wan dey lie ni, you think say na human being like me and you, Google no fit lie na. Guy you dey Bleep up oh."
It was as if shockwaves hit my brains. I then asked him how do I Join so I can escape this poverty. He replied this time with a tone of dissapoimtment and disgust, telling me that I'm very ignorant and should stop talking like an idiot. the Illuminati only approaches rich, famous successful ppl and when they approach you, you don't have a choice,you must join them.

Tune makes fun of sick people, and is always grateful for his good health. he especially enjoys laughing at people who commit suicide, sickman called avicii a phool for killing himself.
His mentality and attitude towards marriage, dating, money, politics etc is something no human being with grey matter in his head should have.
Tune's severed head with a cautionary note should be served in front of his shop.

next is Alhagi aka Sigidi. / Shi-gi-di/
Brother to the King/local traditional ruler.
This guy is what I refer to as an error of nature. In his late 60s at least. many

yo..you have to finish this

oboy81:
next is Alhagi aka Sigidi.
Brother to the King/local traditional ruler.
This guy is what I refer to as an error of nature. In his late 60s at least. many

He has had so many wives uncountable children, grandchildren, greatgrandchildren etc.
Only one is left atm. The wickedest, coldest most calculating of them all. This is no mean fit for no matter how bad a woman might be in this households, 2 or 3 wives at least would still remain in this polygamous house hold.
Sigidi's children all fvcking nuisances. Some if his children do nothing all day and are fatter than me. One of his Sons I know is barely 30, and has changed wives thrice. The current wife is pregnant with the 2nd child and they all live in Sigidi's densely populated face-me-i-face-you house. So is the case with many of his daughters, nephews, daughterinlaws nice etc. All fvcking nuisances. You know why I especially hate Alhaji, it's because he brought so many useless ppl to this world, who in turn brought more fools to the world that are just wasting space and resources drawing humanity back. I'm pretty sure the fvcker knows this, he just doesn't gaf. Selfish bastaed who thinks of only himself and has brought nothing but problem to ppl.
The many was an omo-onile back in the day, committed so many atrocities, sent Sigidis (a type of demon) to his opponents, troubled so many landlords did all those silly shiits omoniles do. But they've sold all their lands, he now survives as an estate agent. Sigidis deserves nothing but. A slow painful death, his severed head sent to his compound with a note reading " ikaoda eyi pada e she rere"

We move on to "more money" Burna boy's illegitimate lost son.
This guy is, or was a friend to my brother. Made money from Yahoo back in the day, blew everything. He later managed to get an African-American woman to come to come to Nigeria, married her here, and is now planning to relocate.
This guy just like my bro is selfish AF! A lot dumber tho, way way greedier and a heavy kusher, really heavy kusher
He looks like Burna, same mannerisms as Burna and Idolizes Burna.

oboy81:
We move on to "more money" Burna boys illegitimate's lost son.
This guy is, or was a friend to my brother. Made money from Yahoo back in the day, blew everything. He later managed to get an African-American woman to come to come to Nigeria, married her here, is now living large and is now planning to relocate to the US
This guy just like my bro is selfish AF! A lot dumber tho, way way greedier and a heavy kusher, really heavy kusher

Despite all his comfort, this guy would cheat even the poorest trader out there. Turns he out he is like the black cat of one rich family, Senseless rude brat to say the least, animal in human skin
I feel like this guy should be slaughtered for food that way he would be more useful to humanity.
Sometimes I wonder how an American woman, an educated american, woman would fall in love with this guy, come down to Nigeria and agree to marry him. I honestly can't understand it. Way way beyond me .
He is an Aspiring trap musician too

Let's look at this woman, iya biola. She is currently the landlady of a house she knows nothing about.
Owner of the house was a stupid philandering Bleep who left his good wife and started banging iya viola who lived on the same street with them. Landlord's wife dies, iya biola moves into house amidst fights, and crazy drama.
Iya biola no send person na. Landlord dies, iya biola inherits house.
note that landlord has a lot of grown children, but none of them are nowhere here today. iya biola is the one collecting rents, she has a big busy shop in front of the house, and now brings different men to Bleep in the house.
Iya biola' s daughters are already building on their mother's foundation, using their bottom power to make money. the last-but-one had a baby for one married man early this year.
The last girl is a community slut already. you know, probably mastering all the useful skills needed to break a Home.

Pls where is Karma again? where is this "bitch" called karma? or is she ministering to me? am I refusing to pick her calls?
I'm not angry or kidding when I say iya biola and her whole lineage should be wiped off!

Next is The Balogun. (War chief)
Omonile, indigene, Muslim, polygamist, juju man, high chief bla bla bla all round dunce, an error of nature.
Balogun is 90+ and going strong. Lucky modafocker. Life is not fair right.
At that age you would expect this guy to see the vanity in life as whole and just lay low. you know be a cool guy and advice the upcoming, NO!

oboy81:
dude beat up his wife so bad that she stopped talking to him completely.
Tune sleeps with underaged girls, tells me how he disvirgins them. he thinks he his very intelligent, says he is a psychologist. knows better than the best of the best. one time he was telling me how the illuminati is controlling Nigerian Superstars and bigmen, how they got all the big guys in US, how they approached Dbanj, wizkid, Davido, Obafemi martins and forced them to join.He did a Google search and showed me the list of the top 10 illuminati members in Nigeria
"lol how are you sure this is accurate?" I asked. He looked at me in shock then screamed "shey Google wan dey lie ni, you think say na human being like me and you, Google no fit lie na. Guy you dey Bleep up oh."
It was as if shockwaves hit my brains. I then asked him how do I Join so I can escape this poverty. He replied this time with a tone of dissapoimtment and disgust, telling me that I'm very ignorant and should stop talking like an idiot. the Illuminati only approaches rich, famous successful ppl and when they approach you, you don't have a choice,you must join them.

Tune makes fun of sick people, and is always grateful for his good health. he especially enjoys laughing at people who commit suicide, sickman called avicii a phool for killing himself.
His mentality and attitude towards marriage, dating, money, politics etc is something no human being with grey matter in his head should have.
Tune's severed head with a cautionary note should be served in front of his shop.

...



seriously avicii is dead.. like the same avicii that sang ' so wake me up when it's all over, when I wiser, when I'm older '

Bro come write o, we waiting

snowlord:
Bro come write o, we waiting

Its intersting yo you abi, but it isn't to me oh, my real life day to day challenges.This is what I go thru.. Some cannot. I know atleast 5 people that are now mentally unbalanced. I knew all of them when they were fully sane
A ghetto where atleast 80% of every young girl here has slept with a married man.
Where ashawo brothels would insult you if you do not reply their 'greetings'
People find it very difficult to move out of the way, just move out of the freaking! way you are obstructing.

oboy81:

I can see this seems like intersting or fun to you, but it isn't to me. This is what I go thru my real life day to day challenges.
A ghetto where atleast 80% of every young girl here has slept with a married man.
Where ashawo brothels would insult you if you do not reply their 'greetings'
People find it very difficult to move out of the way, just move out of the freaking! way you are obstructing.

I remember when I first moved here years back. People said all sorts.
First it was this guy is a pastor
Later they said I was one of this people who grew up in wealth aka ajebutter
Some said he is a Former lecturer, while others said I use to live abroad,
Lol Nigerians are shiiit
I was not born in wealth, I had been agnostic b4 I moved there, I didn't finish university, and I don't even have a visa

Quick one here
Shout out to that man that gave me all the old newspaper in his house, turns out he is a nairalnder, the money made from that has helped cushion a lot of things. Thanks a lot sir

oboy81:
Next is The Balogun. (War chief)
Omonile, indigene, Muslim, polygamist, juju man, high chief bla bla bla all round dunce, an error of nature.
Balogun is 90+ and going strong. Lucky modafocker. Life is not fair right.
At that age you would expect this guy to see the vanity in life as whole and just lay low. you know be a cool guy and advice the upcoming, NO!

He brags about all the rubbish he did as a an omo onile in the 60s 70s 80s
As you would expect his kids are delinquents.
One of his son is in prison for killing someone unprovoked.

oboy81:

I can see this seems like intersting or fun to you, but it isn't to me. It is a very sad challenging situation.This is what I go thru my real life day to day challenges. Some cannot. I know atleast 5 people that are now mentally unbalanced. I knew all of them when they were fully sane
A ghetto where atleast 80% of every young girl here has slept with a married man.
Where ashawo brothels would insult you if you do not reply their 'greetings'
People find it very difficult to move out of the way, just move out of the freaking! way you are obstructing.

I didn't mean to come off as insensitive, it just seemed interesting.

snowlord:
I didn't mean to come off as insensitive, it just seemed interesting.

I know, and no I'm not offended.
I understand that many may find it interesting
I'm just hoping people read and learn. Change if need be and spread that change

biGDhAp:
...



seriously avicii is dead.. like the same avicii that sang ' so wake me up when it's all over, when I wiser, when I'm older '

Sadly, he is

we move on to Mr Dele. the frustration in Mr Dele's life is very evident. A family man in his 40s on a paltry 25k salary. Dele advertised MLM health products to me one time, telling me of a machine that cures diabetes. if I stand on it, it will massage all the blood in my body and my sugar level will come down. A man that can read and write told me this.
One day some people were eating pomo at his security post, he warned us to stop it immediately that ponmo causes cancer.
Dele knows everything in Science, better than Nigerian Scientists, who according to him, are all useless and don't anything. He does not waste any opportunity to lecture me on global warming, climate change, his own very innacurrate version of Nigerian history $ politics, Walter filtration etc.
I don't understand what goes on his head, but he seems to get angry at me very easily. me? one of the nicest guys around. lol I don suffer.
for example if he says something that i am certain is not correct and I ask him if he is sure, he would shout at me and tell that do i think he is a small boy, his first son is older than me, bla bla bla...
Dele has said so many crazy things, some I feel are even very sadistic. like one time he explained the torture process of the Christian hellfire to me. " you will burn finish, burn till you melt to tiny nothing. You will then be resurrected/reformed to your full self again, then burn again like that. it will continue like that forever and ever". "till eternity?" I asked.
smiling Dele - " for eternity "

let's talk about this man, a pastor. He owns a Yoruba-speaking church. He retired voluntarily from the Nigerian police force to become a pastor. Mr Ajiwele aka "Olopa Jesu" .
This guy is a Scammer. A 75yr old Scammer. He Scams people looking to travel out, people looking for 'seed of the womb' , young people looking to get good jobs, meanwhile he has male and female Children that are graduates and are not gainfully employed.
the most painful one is that he scams Sick people. Desperate Sick people hoping to get healing. This Guy is annoying bastard! he deserves nothing but death. I hate him, hate his wife, hate his children.
Someone should do the world a favour and deposit his head in his church promises with cautionary notes in Yoruba and English. you may add bible Quotations too. this may help deter him and other Scammers/Men of God that are in this area.

biGDhAp:
...



seriously avicii is dead.. like the same avicii that sang ' so wake me up when it's all over, when I wiser, when I'm older '

yup

Lamiri:
yup

that's really sad.

Now we move on to this woman.
She has a small local drugstore, provision store near where I stay. A 'chemist/nurse. Semi-illiterate woman in her mind 30s, married with three kids. She has like an older sister or something who is always with her in her shop. Don't know much about her really, just go there to buy some necessities, like soaps, toothpaste etc.
I remember i was there one day and a baby does some really funny stuff, I smile older sister compliments me " you have a nice smile oh, nice set of teeth God created you on a Sunday . Smile more for us o, you hear? " Sister seems more educated .
Now when you tell a depressed soul like me something like that, it hits you deep even if you may not realize it. I nod, collect me things and go

Ileya day comes, everyone is slaughtering herbivores left right and centre. Oboy81 is in his is room, no-one gives a hoot (thats not necessarily a bad thing even, just the way things are for ppl like me here).
I get a knock on my door, small girl is here with a big plate of food says 'my aunty say i should give you'
Me? A hungry frustrated bastard, plenty white rice with two big meats? Chineke!
That's how we start greeting, then small-talking and laughing. Lol Had I known, had I known

oboy81:
Now we move on to this woman.
She has a small local drugstore, provision store near where I stay. A 'chemist/nurse. Semi-illiterate woman in her mind 30s, married with three kids. She has like an older sister or something who is always with her in her shop. Don't know much about her really, just go there to buy some necessities, like soaps, toothpaste etc.
I remember i was there one day and a baby does some really funny stuff, I smile older sister compliments me " you have a nice smile oh, nice set of teeth God created you on a Sunday . Smile more for us you here." (Sister seems more educated) .
Now when you tell a depressed soil like me something like that, it hits you deep even if you may not realize it. I nod collect me things and go

Ileya day comes, everyone is slaughtering herbivores left right and centre. Oboy81 is on his is room, no-one gives a hoot (thats not necessarily a bad thing even, just the way things are for ppl like me here).
I get a knock on my door, small girl is here with a big plate of food says 'my aunty say i should give you'
Me? A hungry frustrated bastard, plenty white rice with two big meats? Chineke!
That's how we start greeting, then small-talking and laughing Had I known lol

I remember the lyrics to the late chief Dr Orlando Owoh's Song.
"Orlando ti mo ba lowo laye, ma shora foro obirnrin.... Ki ma jabo sinu koto obirin"
I don't think he was mysoginist or anything like that, Orlando Owoh just really understood the behaviour and mentality of females in his Demographics.

Please continue

No pause this story na, more strength.

oboy81:
Now we move on to this woman.
She has a small local drugstore, provision store near where I stay. A 'chemist/nurse. Semi-illiterate woman in her mind 30s, married with three kids. She has like an older sister or something who is always with her in her shop. Don't know much about her really, just go there to buy some necessities, like soaps, toothpaste etc.
I remember i was there one day and a baby does some really funny stuff, I smile older sister compliments me " you have a nice smile oh, nice set of teeth God created you on a Sunday . Smile more for us o, you hear? " Sister seems more educated .
Now when you tell a depressed soul like me something like that, it hits you deep even if you may not realize it. I nod, collect me things and go

Ileya day comes, everyone is slaughtering herbivores left right and centre. Oboy81 is in his is room, no-one gives a hoot (thats not necessarily a bad thing even, just the way things are for ppl like me here).
I get a knock on my door, small girl is here with a big plate of food says 'my aunty say i should give you'
Me? A hungry frustrated bastard, plenty white rice with two big meats? Chineke!
That's how we start greeting, then small-talking and laughing. Lol Had I known, had I known