i came across the first chapter of this manuscript on a site i will provide later.international revviewers think it is a rare Nigerian gem, but i think there is nothing special. what do you think.(i can even write better than this 17 year old guy.)


Prologue

[Somewhere in the forest, half unclothed men were running energetically from something that cannot be seen. Eventually they halted]
Follower1: (stopping to catch his breath with his hands pointing towards the direction they were coming from) Egboro, Egboro, They have stopped chasing us. We are far away from them in this thick forest.

Egboro Yes I think we are.(employing his hands to show the expanse of land) look, boys this land is not inhabited and it is filled with good plants, good animals and a good source of water I think we should settle here at least for the time being.

Follower 2: That is a good idea, Egboro. No one would ever locate us here. We have our machetes; we can cut some trees and build a shed.

Follower 3: (laying his hands on his stomach) I think it is better we eat first, I am starving.

Egboro: I can hear all of you. But before we left the land of the giants(puts his hand on his chest) I pledged to the most high God the good ones serve there that if I Egboro should escape without any injury as much as a scratch, my generations and I would praise the Lord forever. We would build an altar, praise and worship God there and I shall name this place Egborooreolorun with means “Hear the goodness of the Lord”
[They all bond down in succesion, pick their machetes and  march off to look for food singing].

Follower 4: What shall we do today?

All: Today o
I will lift up my voice in praise
For I know
You are always there for me
Almighty God
You are my all in all
No matter what I face
When giants come my way
I would praise the Lord.
                                    Curtain falls.











Act 1 scene 1


… A month ago….

[In Elekute, a small but developed town. The association of Elegboro Christain indigene Elekute has commenced their annual meeting in a square hall with a cardboard banner bearing the name of the association]

Oluwagbemiwo: (shakes his clenched hands energetically)Elegboro citizens, Elegboro citizens, you are welcome in the Lords name. I have a great grief in my heart and I would like to share it with you (adjusts the microphone) I went to the village some days back to pay homage to my extended family members but the image that confronted me was not pleasant. (Pauses for a while with his left hand on his waist our people have turned back to idol worshipping. Wickedness and sin have gripped their very soul. (Points upwards)The name of our Lord has been forgotten while they have taken shelter in eight wooden gods.(points diagonally downwards as if the eight gods were sitting there) We all know the wrath of God as written in the Holy book(lifts his bible up) but we have never witnessed one and I would not like our village to be the first point of call.

All: Hm-m (nod their heads in self pity)
Oluwagemiwo: Equally we have at on time or the other been embraced by God’s incomparable forgiving spirit.

All: Yes (nod their heads in agreement)

Oluwagbemiwo: I will want us to rise on our feet and talk to the Lord in prayer the best way we can. The Lord should send a redeemer to redeem the image of our village like he did in the days past in all his beloved cities.
Worship Team: (Silently Sings) All glory must be to the Lord for he is worthy of our praise, No man on earth should give glory to himself. All glory must be to the Lord.

Oluwagbemiwo: In Jesus name we pray. Amen lest I forget, in recognition of the togetherness of this association since inception, we would celebrate our twentieth anniversary in a grand style. I would enjoin you to come with your family and friends and offer all you can to our all good Lord. It is time to begin the real programme. I will call on Baba Bolude, He is not aged, but he is called Baba because of the multitudes of grey hair he has on his head. [They all laughed]

Abolude: [Signals to the chorister] join me in magnifying the one who made it possible for us to be here today [sings].
Be magnified o Lord,
You are highly exalted,
For there is nothing you can’t do,
O Lord my life is on you,
Be magnified,
O Lord,
Be magnified.
                                      Curtain falls


Act 1 scene II
[In the holy land of heaven, just as John described it had a throne which had a rainbow round it. To the right of a mighty throne is a smaller throne for the holy lamb and around the two throne are twenty four seats with twenty four elders. A soft chorus hums].
Ise Oluwa     the good deeds of god
Kole baje o   can never be spoilt
Ise Oluwa    the good deeds of god
                            Kole baje o       can never be spoilt                 
[The song reduces a bit]

All Elders: (stands up in respect) Holy, Holy, Holy, Holy, Lord God Almighty, which was and is and is to come [They bow down]
Thou are worthy O Lord. To receive Glory, Honor and Power, for thou hast created all things and for my pleasure they are created.

An Elder: (points somewhere in the sky where people are praying) Lord, some righteous people are interceding on behalf of this town which has gone astray. I think we should take a second look at the town.

An Elder: This people have sinned terribly, they hardly repent until they feel the wrath of God which so little of them can withstand, But God the all merciful should pity them or else they will all perish even before the time of rapture.

An Elder: It is clearly stated among the Ten Commandments in Exodus 20 verse 4 and 5 that thou shall not make unto thee any craven image or any likeness of anything that is in heaven or above, or that is in the earth beneath or that is in the water under the earth. Thou shall not bow down thyself to them nor serve them, for I the Lord thy God am a jealous God visiting the iniquity of the fathers upon the children unto the third and forth generation of them that hate me.
The holy lamb: Lord, have mercy on them; remember I shed my blood for this people have mercy on them.

Holy one: (In a thundering voice) I am the Lord; the God of all flesh is there anything too hard for me? Behold I will bring again the captivity of Jacob’s tent and have mercy on his dwelling place, and the city shall be built upon her own heap and the palace shall remain after the manner thereof. And out of them shall proceed thanksgiving and the voice of men that make merry and I will multiply them and they shall not be few, I will also glorify them and they shall not be small.

Angels: Hosanna, Hosanna,
Hosanna in the highest 
O lord,
Lord we lift up you name   
With our hearts full of praise
Be exalted, O Lord my God
Hosanna in the highest.
                                    Curtain falls


Act I scene III
[In the deepest depth of the deep, the forces of devil have summed up an emergency meeting. A black mysterious figure enters the gathering].

Suffering: (shouts) All hail the dangerous one

All: (stand up) All hail, All hail

Dangerous one: (raises his hand vertically to signal to them to sit down) Listen, my fellow in wickedness, very soon our great overseer Lucifer expects a very good result on the project Egboro. I am glad to announce to you that we have sent a demon into their midst and the demon was adequately welcomed and accepted by one called Otun Bosipo Aragbagbaye. As time goes on when we start counting our success we will send you (Points to someone) the messenger of tribulations to finish them off.

All: All hail, All hail

Dangerous one: We shall use Egboro land as a stepping stone to a much bigger project to reclaim earth from the Holy one. We shall introduce sins, multitudes of sins into their lives since,(stops in irritation) their H-Ho- Holy book says the holy one despises sins; Oh Lucifer I hate saying that word therefore all sinners are legally ours.

All: All hail, All hail, All hail.

Dangerous One: Calamity.
Calamity: Yes, the dangerous one.
Dangerous one: I want to give you a little bonus assignment to enhance your promotion. There is a small family in Wabowa, which has been prosperous as of recent. They are as rich in money as they are in their spiritual life. But being the best of the “against the Holy one’s” warrior I trust you to carryout this operation adequately and covertly.

Calamity: (squats in respect) your wish is my command
Dangerous one: (points toward the exit of the meeting arena) Go now

Dangerous one: Any query or questions

Pride: Dangerous one, should we not celebrate this feat, (looks around at others to get their nod of approval)

Dangerous one: No, it is not time yet

All: All hail, All hail.
Curtain falls


Act 1 scene IV

[In the dark room with a lowly lit kerosene lamp as its source of illumination, a small boy Daniel and his mother are sleeping on different beds. Daniel is rolling on his bed restlessly to indicate he is dreaming. In a dungeon, where slaves captured from various provinces are kept, fed, maltreated and sold]
Slave Trader: [Slashes his whip against somebody’s back] shut up, shut up all of you. Where you are, no one can hear you. No one can save you. I am you only way out.

Slave 1: [Crying] Yeh, yeh, come and rescue us, come and save us, this pain is unbearable, I have children to cater for.

Slave 2: Ha [crying] I just married my wife when you seized me and took me to join you (struggles to break the chain but was stopped by a lash of the whip). Someone please help me.

Slave Trader: [Slashes his whip again] I said no one can help you. You are in my territory now! [A young boy, Daniel appears from nowhere and looks pitifully at them. Another man appeared but at a far corner]
Daniel: (touches the chains that bound the slaves) stop beating them, stop hurting them, can’t you see they are crying, you are not fair, I am going to help them [moves to take the key to unlock their chains from the slave trader]



Slave Trader: Oh no you can’t, they are mine. But I would also like to acquire you as a part of my slaves. You have a convincing eye and you will make a good sale [moves forward to seize the boy, but steps as he hears an unknown voice form a man moving towards the boy].


Old One: Touch not my anointed and do my prophets no harm (The slave trader moves back in astonishment.
Slave Trader        … and who are you? (Raising his hand in challenge)

Old One: A messenger of the most high. This boy would set your captives free and put you in bondage
Slave Trader: Impossible, no one can capture a slave merchant.

Old One: Well, I will give you the privilege to behold your destruction. [Faces Daniel] You are the Lord’s anointed and you have something to do for him just like Moses brought the Israelites out of Egypt, you will do something likewise. [He disappears].
Daniel                  …old one, old one, old one (looks petrified to show he is not clear with what the old one has just said)

Daniel’s mum: Daniel what again, you woke me up from my sleep

Daniel: I am sorry mummy; I just had that same dream for the tenth time

Daniel’s mum: I think it is time to go to the pastor and tell him the whole story. Continue with your sleep. We will go in the morning.
                                    Curtain falls

H

wot genre of stories do you read,CYBERFREAK.let me guess,technonovels

G