I dated her while in the university, she was a very nice girl. She got another man while I was still hustling around looking for jobs, so we couldn't get married. We actually discussed then and I released her to go and marry because she is my age mate, we were born same year and I wouldn't want to ask her to continue waiting while I continue to hustle. I married 4 years after her. We have been friends on Facebook since 2010 and there's nothing unusual between us. She live in Ibadan with her family while I live in Akure. In January 2020 she asked me to assist her financially to meet certain personal obligation which her hubby couldn't meet because his business isn't doing well of late, she said she'll need the money by end of February and that it's I who she had in mind that could be of help. I promised to do something before the time. She didn't tell me the details of what she wanted to do with the money. Mid February, I was able to sell off 2 plots of land I bought some years ago, In have been trying to sell of the plots without success for sometime. I transferred something tangible to her account which she appreciated so much. Last week in February, I saw a lot of pictures of people in beautiful dresses on Facebook and Instagram. It was a big birthday party for her hubby. I just wrote congratulations. One thing with me is that I hate spending money on parties, I'll rather give it to people around me or invest in buying land.
She later chatted with me on messenger and informed me that I made the birthday party happen, that she used the money I gave her to organize a surprise party for her hubby. I was so amazed.
Why did she have to tell me she used the money I gave her for the party?
Why did she had to seriously beg me for such money?
Where will she tell her hubby she for the money from?
Why didn't she tell me what she wanted to use the money for?

Lai Mohammed said government will be extending the 14 days sit at home if Nigerians don't behave themselves, yet you sold your two lands and gave woman half of the money even before the lockdown was declared.

Bro I swear, your matter tire me

U are STUPID

Nbote:
U are STUPID

You just said the obvious. I look even stupid to myself. Something I don't even do for myself or my wife. I have never spent 10k on my kids birthday before, I look so stupid to myself.

You be Federal mumu ohh

Clap fr ursef

kennybabs1980:
You just said the obvious. I look even stupid to myself. Something I don't even do for myself or my wife. I have never spent 10k on my kids birthday before, I look so stupid to myself.

Ewoo!!! She Dy use juju on you ni?

the deed has been done already, it is so unfortunate that you can't reverse it back but I know you have learn your lesson that is if you are the serious and focus person. come to think of it, didn't you think of giving the money to your wife

Zita55:




Ewoo!!! She Dy use juju on you ni?

I actually thought I was helping her. She could just have kept what she did with the money to herself, she told me.

Lol. What is your business with what she used the money for? She asked and you gave without conditions or are you planning to ask for Sex as a reward?

Lol

If you are to be asked why you are pisssed, will you be able to say something tangible?

The only reason you are full of regret is because you are actually not a real helper and a generous type.You obviously seems to be the type that helps ladies for sex as rewards or who helps guys to expect something monetary and loyal-related rewards or to subjugate.

Or possibly those type who'll help you financially and still want to monitor you to direct you on what and how to use the money they gave you.

We have totally lost all sense of generosity and humanity in this generation.

If men don't help women for sex, they'll help their fellow men for loyalty and to enslave them.
If women don't help men to manipulate and rub it on their face with insults later, they'll help women to gossip and mock them.

Too bad mehn!

In all your life endeavors and activities, in all your doings and meetings to people, no matter what--NEVER BE POOR!!

Even if you are poor, don't form the habit of begging and asking for help, because asking for help and begging as a habit is worse and deadlier than the habit of drug and masturbation.

tracyfemmmm:
Lol. What is your business with what she used the money for? She asked and you gave without conditions or are you planning to ask for Sex as a reward?

Forget that. I've stopped that, I don't do sex outside marriage anymore. God help me, Amen.

Nbote:
U are STUPID

He is an embarassment to people who are stupid, they will reject him. He is something worse

u gave it to her as a loan or dash.if u dash her d money. is none of ur business what she did with d money

She will be back again with another method, so prepare.

She takes you as a friend.

kennybabs1980:

She later chatted with me on messenger and informed me that I made the birthday party happen, that she used the money I gave her to organize a surprise party for her hubby.
I was so amazed.
Why did she have to tell me she used the money I gave her for the party?

This is funny!

It's a classic case of 'identify your maga', get him to do what you want and rub it in his face

What's the problem exactly?

Mizwisdom:
She takes you as a friend.

Yeah. Your boyfriend too will keep an ex for the suppose of supporting and footing her domestic needs.


Please don't come here and create thread for advise. Ok?

I believe the lady in question must have knew your own MUMU started with capital letter and that is why she didn't inform you on what she wanted to do with the money....
Imagine you sold your only 2 plots of land because of your ex... I swear you don't need to compete with anyone before you become the chairman of NIGERIA ASSOCIATION of MUMU

That is why i only assist people with the amount i can afford

E.g If your Problem is 20k and i have 50k with me ..i will give you 5k if you like use all the money to smoke weed or use it to entice ur Boo is none of my Business


If you aint family i can't kill myself

This guy is not stupid, the lady just messed up, she might be in need of money next time, op will not help her because she liked. Op, leave everything to God, she will surely suffer for it because the husband must not hear the she did.

Leave her to God, you have given her so don't question her. She is still coming for another help, that time you will remind her of this. Some women are just senseless

kennybabs1980:
I dated her while in the university, she was a very nice girl. She got another man while I was still hustling around looking for jobs, so we couldn't get married. We actually discussed then and I released her to go and marry because she is my age mate, we were born same year and I wouldn't want to ask her to continue waiting while I continue to hustle. I married 4 years after her. We have been friends on Facebook since 2010 and there's nothing unusual between us. She live in Ibadan with her family while I live in Akure. In January 2020 she asked me to assist her financially to meet certain personal obligation which her hubby couldn't meet because his business isn't doing well of late, she said she'll need the money by end of February and that it's I who she had in mind that could be of help. I promised to do something before the time. She didn't tell me the details of what she wanted to do with the money. Mid February, I was able to sell off 2 plots of land I bought some years ago, In have been trying to sell of the plots without success for sometime. I transferred something tangible to her account which she appreciated so much. Last week in February, I saw a lot of pictures of people in beautiful dresses on Facebook and Instagram. It was a big birthday party for her hubby. I just wrote congratulations. One thing with me is that I hate spending money on parties, I'll rather give it to people around me or invest in buying land.
She later chatted with me on messenger and informed me that I made the birthday party happen, that she used the money I gave her to organize a surprise party for her hubby. I was so amazed.
Why did she have to tell me she used the money I gave her for the party?
Why did she had to seriously beg me for such money?
Where will she tell her hubby she for the money from?
Why didn't she tell me what she wanted to use the money for?

Brother, if I was close to you, I would have given you a resounding slap to calibrate your sense back to default.

I am sure you can't give your wife that money nor use that amount to celebrate anything for your family or relatives.

Are you Animashun that you are 'helping' your ex?

Or is it the case of 'boy is good?' Apa lonje be!

Ikan ti won fi Elemosho sho lon ma sho; ma koju si iyawo and omo re, oko ex e a wa baa e!

Oshisko!

extol1:
the deed has been done already, it is so unfortunate that you can't [b]reverse it back [/b]but I know you have learn your lesson that is if you are the serious and focus person. come to think of it, didn't you think of giving the money to your wife

Do you want to 'reverse to the front' before?

Op said ten thounsand
giving a Ex ten thounsand is not a big deal. If you guys did not part ways without quarrel their is no big deal in that to be sincere. But well everybody is entitle to his opinion.

Justice505:
Op said ten thounsand
giving a Ex ten thounsand is not a big deal. If you guys did not part ways without quarrel their is no big deal in that to be sincere. But well everybody is entitle to his opinion.

He said something tangible,I suspect around #100k.
He wouldn’t be lamenting and gnashing his teeth if it was #10k.

Justice505:
Op said ten thounsand
giving a Ex ten thounsand is not a big deal. If you guys did not part ways without quarrel their is no big deal in that to be sincere. But well everybody is entitle to his opinion.

It can't be 10k...I'm sure he sent more.

BTW, the woman no try o. Carry ex money do birthday for present... Na real wa for her.

I don't see any other bad thing your ex did, aside the issue of your needless closeness with her which resulted to her telling you about her husband's shortcomings.

And, you to an extent didn't do any bad helping her financially. It's just that you had no premonition, or weren't discerning enough to psych her in order to know the importance, of what she wanted the money for which would have made it possible for you to decide whether or not to extend the help to her at that point - anyone could have been in your position in that instance, so don't be too hard on yourself.

There's no justifiable reason to cast aspersions on her for seeking financial assistance from you or receiving financial assistance from you (citing the needles closeness that was in place), since you didn't state that you made her to know that you weren't buoyant, just like her husband. So, she didn't guilt-trip you into selling your landed property or extort you.

In summary, according to your submission, you acted voluntarily (but definitely not selflessly), even though you now wish you knew better which would have afforded you the opportunity to act conscientiously. Once more, don't be too hard on yourself. There's nothing bad in extending a helping hand to anyone who crosses your path, more so an ex or associate in good standing, provided that you're in position - and selflessly willing - to do so.

You're married. She's married. It's time to cut the cord and face your own families.

NextD18:
If you are to be asked why you are pisssed, will you be able to say something tangible?

The only reason you are full of regret is because you are actually not a real helper and a generous type.You obviously seems to be the type that helps ladies for sex as rewards or who helps guys to expect something monetary and loyal-related rewards or to subjugate.

Or possibly those type who'll help you financially and still want to monitor you to direct you on what and how to use the money they gave you.

We have totally lost all sense of generosity and humanity in this generation.

If men don't help women for sex, they'll help their fellow men for loyalty and to enslave them.
If women don't help men to manipulate and rub it on their face with insults later, they'll help women to gossip and mock them.

Too bad mehn!

In all your life endeavors and activities, in all your doings and meetings to people, no matter what--NEVER BE POOR!!

Even if you are poor, don't form the habit of begging and asking for help, because asking for help and begging as a habit is worse and deadlier than the habit of drug and masturbation.

Never help someone when when you dont know what the help is meant for.

sisisioge:


It can't be 10k...I'm sure he sent more.

BTW, the woman no try o. Carry ex money do birthday for present... Na real wa for her.

Na so some foolish women take dey put curse for their husbanb head. So if na ritual money, the husband don celebrate him last birthday be that.