thank u

haha, yes awesome name

haha, thanks for awesome replies.

hmmm!

good point

A girl and a guy are on a motorcycle

Girl: This is really scary, slow down!
Guy: No, I'm having too much fun!
Girl: Please stop!
Guy: First hug me

Girl: *hugs*
Guy: Tell me you love me
Girl:I love you, can you slow down now?
Guy: Can you take my helmet off and put it on yourself? It's bugging me
Girl: *puts on helmet*

Next Day's Headlines:
There was an accident involving a motocycle accident. There were two people riding the motorcycle at the time of impact.
The vehicle was speeding out of control and drove off road and into a building. Only one of the two people died.

What Really Happened:
Half way through the ride the guy noticed that the brakes were gone, but he didn't want to scare the girl.
So he got her to hug him one last time, and to know that she loved him. He got her to wear the helmet so that if they did crash, that she would survive, although that meant that he had to die...

AKPOS married typical good-looking lady and after the wedding, he laid down the following rules:

“I’ll be home when I want, if I want and at what time I want-and I don’t expect any hassle from you. I expect a great dinner to be on the table unless I tell you that I won’t be home for dinner. I’ll go hunting, fishing, boozing and card-playing when I want with my old buddies and don’t you give me a hard time about it. Those are my rules. Any comments?”

His new bride said,
“No, that’s fine with me. Just understand that there will be S^x here at seven o’clock every night, whether you’re here or not.”

one word for Bride

hmmm

yeah, thats what i wanna prove

hehe, yes. Becoz of no jobs...

Boy: I bet i can make u say I Love u.

Girl: impossible.

boy : ok, lets try........ say blue...

girl : blue..

Boy: say pink..

girl: pink..

Boy: say love. .

girl : love..

Boy: whats 1+1

girl : 2

Boy: how old are you...

girl : 19

boy :Hmm! I TOLD U I COULD MAKE U SAY 19!

girl : no, u said u could make me say I love u..!!

Boy: And i have done it....

AKPOS is the Boss in Office. Lets see how he is interviewing people.

AKPOS: There are 500
bricks on a plane. You drop one outside. How many are left?

Applicant: That's easy, 499

AKPOS: What are the three steps to put an elephant into a fridge?

Applicant: Open the fridge.
Put the elephant in.
Close the fridge.

AKPOS: What are the four steps to put a deer into the fridge?

Applicant: Open the fridge.
Take the elephant out.
Put the deer in.
Close the fridge.

AKPOS: It's lion's birthday, all the animals are there except one, why?

Applicant: Because the deer is in the fridge.

AKPOS: How does an old woman cross a swamp filled with crocodiles?

Applicant: She just crosses it because the crocodiles are at the lion's birthday.

AKPOS: Last question. In the end the old lady still died. Why?

Applicant: Er....I guess she drowned?

AKPOS: No! She was hit by the brick. You may leave now.

IS HE A GOOD BOSS?
Yes or No??

do u think anything is impossible to God?

mmm, thats n0t m0vie

hmm! What do im gonna do with likes? Can i eat them?

thnks

Nothing is Impossible to God...

A young man working in the army was constantly humiliated because he believed in God.

One day the captain decided to humiliate him before the troops.

He called the young man and said: Young man, take the key and go and park the Jeep in front.

The young man replied: I can not drive!

The captain said: But then ask your assistance from God! Shows us that He exists!

The young man took the key and walked to the vehicle, praying the whole time...

As a result he parked the Jeep to the place PERFECTLY well as the captain wanted.

The young man came out of the jeep and saw them all crying.

They all said together: We want to serve your God!

The young soldier was astonished, he wanted to know what was going on?

CAPTAIN was crying, and then he opened the hood of the jeep showing the young man that the car had no engine.

Then the boy said: See? This is the God I serve, the God who gives life to what does not exist. You may think there are things that still impossible.

If you believe in GOD Hit The LIKE BUTTON And Type Yes

♥ Boy:- Hey ?
♥ Girl:- Yeah... How are you
♥ Boy:- I am fine. Can you make My Biggest dream come true ? You are the onlyone Who can does...o...
♥ Girl:- Sure..what's your dream..
♥ Boy:- I just want your one signature darling... please...
♥ Girl:- Don't be sad baby, where you want my signature. ?
♥ Boy:- On Our' Marriage Certificate...' ♥

hehe, yeah

thank you for your comments. Follow me for more

OncE A Guy wHo recenTLy hAd a brEaKoff withHer giRL friend was aSkEd ….HAv U leFt uR girL frieNd or sHe left u

He smileD And answerED.. L0vE LefT us!!!

its real

Akpos goes to the post office, buys an envelope and screams out loud into it and then seals it.

When the post office attendant asked him why he did that?

He laughed and replied with a soft voice.
"YOU KNOW NOTHING, I'M SENDING A VOICE MAIL"

One Word For Akpos?

thanks for ur comments.

There was a little boy whose 1st love was a young girl in a picture which he found and picked from the street ...

As time went by he got married, But still kept it.

One day, his wife found it and asked, "Where did u get this?"

The man said, "I kept that since I was a child, But why r U asking?"

The girl replied, "I lost this picture when I was 9…"

ONE WORD ABOUT THEM

Without Your Love

One day a guy and a girl were driving home from the movies. The boy sensed there was something wrong because of the painful silence they shared between them that day.

The girl then asked the boy to pull over because she wanted to talk. She told him that her feelings had changed & that it was time to move on.

A silent tear slid down his cheek as he said nothing and his hand slowly reached into his pocket & passed her a folded note.

At that moment, a drunk driver was speeding down that very same street. He swerved right into the drivers seat, killing the boy.

Miraculously, the girl survived. Remembering the note, she pulled it out & read it. "Without your love, I would die."

ONE WORD FOR THAT BOY??

Akpos was doing his maths homework & saying:
2+5, the son of a b!tch is 7
3+6, the son of a b!tch is 9...

His Mom : What are you doing ?
Akpors : I'm doing maths homework
Mom : this is how your teacher taught you?
Akpors : Yes

Infuriated, Mom asked the teacher the next day "What are you teaching my son in maths?"
Teacher : Right now, we are learning addition.

Mom : you teaching them to say 2+2, the Son of a b!tch is 4 ?
Teacher after laughing : What I taught them was, 2+2, The Sum of Which is 4

One word for Akpors?

Keyboard shortcuts that you might not know.

Keyboard Shorcuts (Microsoft Windows)
1. CTRL+C (Copy)
2. CTRL+X (Cut) ...
3. CTRL+V (Paste)
4. CTRL+Z (Undo)
5. DELETE (Delete)
6. SHIFT+DELETE (Delete the selected item permanently without placing the item in the Recycle Bin)
7. CTRL while dragging an item (Copy the selected item)
8. CTRL+SHIFT while dragging an item (Create a shortcut to the selected item)
9. F2 key (Rename the selected item)
10. CTRL+RIGHT ARROW (Move the insertion point to the beginning of the next word)
11. CTRL+LEFT ARROW (Move the insertion point to the beginning of the previous word)
12. CTRL+DOWN ARROW (Move the insertion point to the beginning of the next paragraph)
13. CTRL+UP ARROW (Move the insertion point to the beginning of the previous paragraph)
14. CTRL+SHIFT with any of the arrow keys (Highlight a block of text) SHIFT with any of the arrow keys (Select more than one item in a window or on the desktop, or select text in a document)
15. CTRL+A (Select all)
16. F3 key (Search for a file or a folder)
17. ALT+ENTER (View the properties for the selected item)
18. ALT+F4 (Close the active item, or quit the active program)
19. ALT+ENTER (Display the properties of the selected object)
20. ALT+SPACEBAR (Open the shortcut menu for the active window)
21. CTRL+F4 (Close the active document in programs that enable you to have multiple documents opensimultaneously)
22. ALT+TAB (Switch between the open items)
23. ALT+ESC (Cycle through items in the order that they had been opened)
24. F6 key (Cycle through the screen elements in a window or on the desktop)
25. F4 key (Display the Address bar list in My Computer or Windows Explorer)
26. SHIFT+F10 (Display the shortcut menu for the selected item)
27. ALT+SPACEBAR (Display the System menu for the active window)
28. CTRL+ESC (Display the Start menu)
29. ALT+Underlined letter in a menu name (Display the corresponding menu) Underlined letter in a command name on an open menu (Perform the corresponding command)
30. F10 key (Activate the menu bar in the active program)
31. RIGHT ARROW (Open the next menu to the right, or open a submenu)
32. LEFT ARROW (Open the next menu to the left, or close a submenu)
33. F5 key (Update the active window)
34. BACKSPACE (View the folder onelevel up in My Computer or Windows Explorer)
35. ESC (Cancel the current task)
36. SHIFT when you insert a CD- ROMinto the CD-ROM drive (Prevent the CD-ROM from automatically playing)

Dialog Box - Keyboard Shortcuts
1. CTRL+TAB (Move forward through the tabs)
2. CTRL+SHIFT+TAB (Move backward through the tabs)
3. TAB (Move forward through the options)
4. SHIFT+TAB (Move backward through the options)
5. ALT+Underlined letter (Perform the corresponding command or select the corresponding option)
6. ENTER (Perform the command for the active option or button)
7. SPACEBAR (Select or clear the check box if the active option is a check box)
8. Arrow keys (Select a button if the active option is a group of option buttons)
9. F1 key (Display Help)
10. F4 key (Display the items in the active list)
11. BACKSPACE (Open a folder one level up if a folder is selected in the Save As or Open dialog box)

Microsoft Natural Keyboard Shortcuts
1. Windows Logo (Display or hide the Start menu)
2. Windows Logo+BREAK (Display the System Properties dialog box)
3. Windows Logo+D (Display the desktop)
4. Windows Logo+M (Minimize all of the windows)
5. Windows Logo+SHIFT+M (Restorethe minimized windows)
6. Windows Logo+E (Open My Computer)
7. Windows Logo+F (Search for a file or a folder)
8. CTRL+Windows Logo+F (Search for computers)
9. Windows Logo+F1 (Display Windows Help)
10. Windows Logo+ L (Lock the keyboard)
11. Windows Logo+R (Open the Run dialog box)
12. Windows Logo+U (Open Utility Manager)
13. Accessibility Keyboard Shortcuts
14. Right SHIFT for eight seconds (Switch FilterKeys either on or off)
15. Left ALT+left SHIFT+PRINT SCREEN (Switch High Contrast either on or off)
16. Left ALT+left SHIFT+NUM LOCK (Switch the MouseKeys either on or off)
17. SHIFT five times (Switch the StickyKeys either on or off)
18. NUM LOCK for five seconds (Switch the ToggleKeys either on or off)
19. Windows Logo +U (Open Utility Manager)
20. Windows Explorer Keyboard Shortcuts
21. END (Display the bottom of the active window)
22. HOME (Display the top of the active window)
23. NUM LOCK+Asterisk sign (*) (Display all of the subfolders that are under the selected folder)
24. NUM LOCK+Plus sign (+) (Display the contents of the selected folder)
25. NUM LOCK+Minus sign (-) (Collapse the selected folder)
26. LEFT ARROW (Collapse the current selection if it is expanded, or select the parent folder)
27. RIGHT ARROW (Display the current selection if it is collapsed, or select the first subfolder)

Shortcut Keys for Character Map
After you double-click a character on the grid of characters, you can move through the grid by using the keyboard shortcuts:
1. RIGHT ARROW (Move to the rightor to the beginning of the next line)
2. LEFT ARROW (Move to the left orto the end of the previous line)
3. UP ARROW (Move up one row)
4. DOWN ARROW (Move down one row)
5. PAGE UP (Move up one screen at a time)
6. PAGE DOWN (Move down one screen at a time)
7. HOME (Move to the beginning of the line)
8. END (Move to the end of the line)
9. CTRL+HOME (Move to the first character)
10. CTRL+END (Move to the last character)
11. SPACEBAR (Switch between Enlarged and Normal mode when a character is selected)

Microsoft Management Console (MMC) Main Window Keyboard Shortcuts
1. CTRL+O (Open a saved console)
2. CTRL+N (Open a new console)
3. CTRL+S (Save the open console)
4. CTRL+M (Add or remove a console item)
5. CTRL+W (Open a new window)
6. F5 key (Update the content of all console windows)
7. ALT+SPACEBAR (Display the MMC window menu)
8. ALT+F4 (Close the console)
9. ALT+A (Display the Action menu)
10. ALT+V (Display the View menu)
11. ALT+F (Display the File menu)
12. ALT+O (Display the Favorites menu)

MMC Console Window Keyboard Shortcuts
1. CTRL+P (Print the current page or active pane)
2. ALT+Minus sign (-) (Display the window menu for the active console window)
3. SHIFT+F10 (Display the Action shortcut menu for the selected item)
4. F1 key (Open the Help topic, if any, for the selected item)
5. F5 key (Update the content of all console windows)
6. CTRL+F10 (Maximize the active console window)
7. CTRL+F5 (Restore the active console window)
8. ALT+ENTER (Display the Properties dialog box, if any, for theselected item)
9. F2 key (Rename the selected item)
10. CTRL+F4 (Close the active console window. When a console has only one console window, this shortcut closes the console)

Remote Desktop Connection Navigation
1. CTRL+ALT+END (Open the Microsoft Windows NT Security dialog box)
2. ALT+PAGE UP (Switch between programs from left to right)
3. ALT+PAGE DOWN (Switch between programs from right to left)
4. ALT+INSERT (Cycle through the programs in most recently used order)
5. ALT+HOME (Display the Start menu)
6. CTRL+ALT+BREAK (Switch the client computer between a window and a full screen)
7. ALT+DELETE (Display the Windows menu)
8. CTRL+ALT+Minus sign (-) (Place a snapshot of the active window in the client on the Terminal server clipboard and provide the same functionality as pressing PRINT SCREEN on a local computer.)
9. CTRL+ALT+Plus sign (+) (Place asnapshot of the entire client window area on the Terminal server clipboardand provide the same functionality aspressing ALT+PRINT SCREEN on a local computer.)

Microsoft Internet Explorer Keyboard Shortcuts
1. CTRL+B (Open the Organize Favorites dialog box)
2. CTRL+E (Open the Search bar)
3. CTRL+F (Start the Find utility)
4. CTRL+H (Open the History bar)
5. CTRL+I (Open the Favorites bar)
6. CTRL+L (Open the Open dialog box)
7. CTRL+N (Start another instance of the browser with the same Web address)
8. CTRL+O (Open the Open dialog box,the same as CTRL+L)
9. CTRL+P (Open the Print dialog box)
10. CTRL+R (Update the current Web page)
11. CTRL+W (Close the current window)


~ Share it please, Knowledge is to share ~

A Professor at the University was giving a lecture on the Supernatural. To get a feel for his audience, he asked,
"How many people here believe in ghosts?"

About 90 students raise their hands.

"Well, that's a good start. Out of those of you who believe in ghosts, do you think you've seen a ghost?"
About 40 students raise their hands.

"That's really good. I'm really glad you take this Seriously. Has anyone here ever talked to a ghost?"

About 15 Students raise their hands.

"Has anyone here ever touched a ghost?"

3 Students raise their Hands.

"That's Fantastic! Now let me ask ask you one question further, has any of you ever made love to a ghost?"

Way in the back, a student Akpos raised his hand, The Professor takes off his glasses, and says,

"Guy, all the Years I've been giving this lecture, no one has ever claimed to have made love to a ghost. You've got to come up here and tell us about your Experience."

The Big redneck student Akpos replied with a nod and a grin, and began to make his way up to the Podium. When he reached the front of the room, the Professor asks,

"So, tell us what it's like to have s3x with a ghost?"

Akpos replied: "Shit! From way back there, I thought you said, 'Goats!'"