It was a usual night like all Sunday nights, we jus finished with dinner, we were watching "women of faith" album ( we usually do this on Sunday nights in our family). when I was younger, I had a crush on one of the women, I told my mum, so theyb( with my 3 sisters,I was the only boy) make jokes about it...like calling her my wife lol. I enjoyed my childhood sha

so I started asking my dad questions about his education. I was about to enter University back then. He told me he did his Bsc in the United States of America. I laughed hard, told him to be serious...he seriously repeated it. I looked at my mom, with the kind of "is it true" look. she nodded . lol, in my mind, these couple wan play their tricks on me abi. I didn't take it serious though, he said a lot of things, about studying in Arkansas University, been to Mississippi etc

Then one day, me and my sisters ( 2 are married now with kids all boys), were cleaning our house, it's normal on Saturdays. I received the shock of my life...I stumbled on one brown colored pack, lol curiosity indeed kills the cat. I opened it to know the content of the packet. behold, I saw my dad's passport, he's student ID card, us driving license and an album of his graduation class.

so this man was actually serious about studying in us. but why the hell did he come back? wtf happened.
To be continued

Probably you wouldn't have existed through them.

Thank God he didn't, cos you are alive

such is life

He obviously bought the "naija go betta" scam.

There are many of them like that. Today their kids are suffering

Technically, if he hadn't come back you would have been non existent because he won't meet your mom.

Activist001:
Technically, if he hadn't come back you would have been non existent because he won't meet your mom.

Most would rather not exist than live in naija.

So many of our parents made this stupid mistakes and a lot of us are paying dearly today for their foolishness.

maternal:


Most would rather not exist than live in naija.

No be lie.

tensazangetsu20:
So many of our parents made this stupid mistakes and a lot of us are paying dearly today for their foolishness.

Like almost every Nigerian, they are selfish and are now paying the price. Unfortunately their children are not learning from their stupidity and selfishness. Everytime i see a "should I migrate to Canada or stay and build on (insert some nonsense business or laughable salary) I shake my head. The typical Nigerian is too dumb when considering planning for tomorrow.

Fake stories, so.it is when you were about to enter the university, you knew your dad studied in US

I know this story is fake let me just pretend it's true,one could still be miserable if you have no plans.
Studying in USA doesn't guaranteen automatic citizenship so it's funny someone will blame his dad for leaving after purpose he went there for expires

Petyprincess:
I know this story is fake let me just pretend it's true,one could still be miserable if you have no plans.
Studying in USA doesn't guaranteen automatic citizenship so it's funny someone will blame his dad for leaving after purpose he went there for expires

always coming to display ignorance. Those that stayed after studying in the 1980s and 90s must have gotten green card/ Citizenship by now. It was as hard as it is now with trump and his crazy rules

Kekereekun123:
always coming to displays ignorance. Those that stayed after studying in the 1980s and 90s must have gotten green card/ Citizenship by now. It was as hard as it is now with trump and his crazy rules

Exactly, he's friends back then have green cards now. They come to visit us during Xmas.

goldishays:

Exactly, he's friends back then have green cards now. They come to visit us during Xmas.

I have a uncle and auntie who found ways to stay. The immigration system wasn't as strict. This was pre 9/11 and pre Trump. People found ways. Your father has failed you, and especially himself. His mates children are enjoying and striving in America while your protesting against SARS with no job. Because of your fathers selfishness and stupidity.

Goodman247:
Fake stories, so.it is when you were about to enter the university, you knew your dad studied in US

You will be shocked that some didn't even know the school their parents attended or the course they studied. This has to do with communication. When parents don't communicate or discuss life matters with their kids, such knowledge gap is bound to occur.

For those blaming the Dad for coming back after studies abroad, it is not a crime to return home after your studies if you are sure of being gainfully employed. I did same in 2010 after my masters in UK that was sponsored by PTDF and I don't have any regret returning back.

Though I am not where I want to be yet but when I looked back, I felt some sense of achievement and success in Nigeria and I also believe that my kids will find their own success as long as I lay solid foundation for them.

Focusmind:


You will be shocked that some didn't even know the school their parents attended or the course they studied. This has to do with communication. When parents don't communicate or discuss life matters with their kids, such knowledge gap is bound to occur.

For those blaming the Dad for coming back after studies abroad, it is not a crime to return home after your studies if you are sure of being gainfully employed. I did same in 2010 after my masters in UK that was sponsored by PTDF and I don't have any regret returning back.

Though I am not where I want to be yet but when I looked back, I felt some sense of achievement and success in Nigeria and I also believe that my kids will find their own success as long as I lay solid foundation for them.

You're naive if you think your kids will find success in Nigeria. This isn't about money or a job. This is about SARS, a lawless country, a functional society, access to the world Visa free, etc. But because you were success and was offered a job, you were too selfish to think about your children or future children's success at the time ? Such as what if they won't be as fortunate as myself ? 20 years from now your children will be making a thread like this. Its not too late. Try to get out.

Focusmind:


You will be shocked that some didn't even know the school their parents attended or the course they studied. This has to do with communication. When parents don't communicate or discuss life matters with their kids, such knowledge gap is bound to occur.

For those blaming the Dad for coming back after studies abroad, it is not a crime to return home after your studies if you are sure of being gainfully employed. I did same in 2010 after my masters in UK that was sponsored by PTDF and I don't have any regret returning back.

Though I am not where I want to be yet but when I looked back, I felt some sense of achievement and success in Nigeria and I also believe that my kids will find their own success as long as I lay solid foundation for them.

truly this is not the time for blaming. They didn't know and one cant blame them. My father first went to Europe in the 80s, helped many relatives and friends there, even when Ireland was doing give birth and collect citizenship in the late 90s. Today hin eye don clear. We his kids except one have all japa. Nigeria of 2045 will be worse than this present one. If you can flee. Please do

Petyprincess:
I know this story is fake let me just pretend it's true,one could still be miserable if you have no plans.
Studying in USA doesn't guaranteen automatic citizenship so it's funny someone will blame his dad for leaving after purpose he went there for expires

Don't be too quick to conclude..

My old girl told me in the late 70s/80s when she went to school, the US Dollar was literally half of the Naira. I.e 1naira= 2USD ... Yes, Nigeria was considered a very very rich country back then.

Secondly no African felt that comfortable in the US around the 70's/ 80's because there was still an unfair atmosphere/attitude to people of African descent, the civil rights movement of MLK literally just ended...so why bother staying in a country where you were subject to racial inequality at the time when Nigeria was alot better?

Thirdly the US then was not even an attractive immigration destination in the 70's/80's, especially for a black person(black people were not even allowed into some places-segregation was still common) ... not to talk of Canada lol �, old girl called Canada an expensive ice skating rink. She constantly stated that there were no jobs in Canada in the 70's, plus their economy was very bad due to crazy inflation... so how they have jobs everywhere now is still a mystery to her. She immediately turned down a job offer in Alaska when she graduated, her reason was; "Is she crazy? to work in a "deep freezer" looking out for Polar bears every second, when her country had the best weather in the world?" ...

Fourthly she mentioned in the 70's if a foreigner below 18 years came to the US and stayed for about 4-5 years(which was usually the duration of a bachelors degree), he or she was eligible for citizenship, So the op is most likely saying the truth about his father especially if he went for a bachelors degree.

She concluded by saying Nigerians who ended up staying back in the US after schooling back in the 70's were probably;

1. those who were severely affected by the Biafran war and thought it best not to return

2. those who got romantically attached, I.e either got married to an American who was not approved by their family, either impregnated an American lady or a fellow immigrant student...or got pregnant and were ashamed to come back to Nigeria. "Shame" in our parents days, was a big deal apparently. (So you can imagine what runs through their minds when they watch Big BrotherNigeria )

3.those who did not graduate from university especially after being funded heavily by Nigerian scholarships (a classic case of her friend who was sent to study medicine but dropped out and later switched to nursing which was considered a "nonsensical course" in Nigeria back then) those bunch, were tagged as truants and a disgrace to the Nigerian society.

4. those who adopted "bad American habits" that were too embarrassing to return home with. E.g doing drugs, etc... you don't need anyone to tell you that the moral standards in Nigeria back in those days of our parents were insanely high.

5. Those who were naturally crazy/daring, looking for adventure and independence from culture and traditions, basically-the Black sheep of families in other words; those whose families had labelled them as "outcasts" right from day-1 (a friends dad who is Nigerian often tells his ironic story of how his family sent him to America to study as a tactic to separate him from his friends who were influencing him "negatively" ... he caught up with them in the US shortly after, because his friends families also had the same idea , in the end it was a fail... they chose to remain in the US and become pimps literally )

However most Nigerians who went to school in the US back then, mostly returned because Nigeria was actually very prosperous. Jobs, welfare, organization etc...

P.S
She said American Universities were very easy to get into as a Nigerian, because the Nigerian education system was directly equivalent to British education standards, which was far thorough and had a classic background as compared to American education standards back then.
So it was more prestigious to go to a British University than an American University/college in the 70's. Which of course were harder to get into.

optimusprime2:


Don't be too quick to conclude..

My old girl told me in the late 70s/80s when she went to school, the US Dollar was literally half of the Naira. I.e 1naira= 2USD ... Yes, Nigeria was considered a very very rich country back then.

Secondly no African felt that comfortable in the US around the 70's/ 80's because there was still an unfair atmosphere/attitude to people of African descent, the civil rights movement of MLK literally just ended...so why bother staying in a country where you were subject to racial inequality at the time when Nigeria was alot better?

Thirdly the US then was not even an attractive immigration place in the 70's/80's, not to talk of Canada lol �, old girl called Canada an expensive ice skating rink. She constantly stated that there were no jobs in Canada in the 70's so how they do now is still a mystery to her. She immediately turned down a job offer in Alaska when she graduated, her reason was "Is she crazy? to work in a "deep freezer" looking out for Polar bears every second when her country has the best weather in the world" ...

Fourthly she mentioned in the 70's if a foreigner below 18 years came to the US and stayed for about 4-5 years(which was usually the duration of a bachelors degree), he or she was eligible for citizenship, So the op is most likely saying the truth about his father especially if he went for a bachelors degree.

She concluded by saying Nigerians who ended up staying back in the US after schooling back in the 70's were probably;

1. those who were severely affected by the Biafran war and thought it best not to return

2. those who got romantically attached, I.e either got married to an American who was not approved by their family, or got pregnant and were ashamed to come back to Nigeria.

3.those who did not graduate from university especially after being funded heavily by Nigerian scholarships (a classic case of her friend who was sent to study medicine but dropped out and later switched to nursing which was considered a "nonsensical course" in Nigeria back then)

4. those who adopted "bad American habits" that were too embarrassing to return home with.

5. Those who were naturally crazy/daring, looking for adventure and independence from culture and traditions,

However most Nigerians who went to school in the US back then mostly returned because Nigeria was actually very prosperous. Jobs, welfare etc...

P.S
She said American Universities were very easy to get into as a Nigerian, because the Nigerian education system was directly equivalent to British education standards, which was far thorough and had a classic background as compared to American education standards back then.
So it was more prestigious to go to a British University than an American University/college in the 70's. Which of course were harder to get into.

I think he should state the year his dad graduated. But some are still returning now, and some are still asking if they should migrate out of Nigeria. The one's who have the means. There's a lot of truth to what you wrote. Other elders have have said the same. But I still feel it comes down to selfishness and not having the ability to plan ahead.

optimusprime2:


Don't be too quick to conclude..

My old girl told me in the late 70s/80s when she went to school, the US Dollar was literally half of the Naira. I.e 1naira= 2USD ... Yes, Nigeria was considered a very very rich country back then.

Secondly no African felt that comfortable in the US around the 70's/ 80's because there was still an unfair atmosphere/attitude to people of African descent, the civil rights movement of MLK literally just ended...so why bother staying in a country where you were subject to racial inequality at the time when Nigeria was alot better?

Thirdly the US then was not even an attractive immigration place in the 70's/80's, not to talk of Canada lol �, old girl called Canada an expensive ice skating rink. She constantly stated that there were no jobs in Canada in the 70's so how they do now is still a mystery to her. She immediately turned down a job offer in Alaska when she graduated, her reason was "Is she crazy? to work in a "deep freezer" looking out for Polar bears every second when her country has the best weather in the world" ...

Fourthly she mentioned in the 70's if a foreigner below 18 years came to the US and stayed for about 4-5 years(which was usually the duration of a bachelors degree), he or she was eligible for citizenship, So the op is most likely saying the truth about his father especially if he went for a bachelors degree.

She concluded by saying Nigerians who ended up staying back in the US after schooling back in the 70's were probably;

1. those who were severely affected by the Biafran war and thought it best not to return

2. those who got romantically attached, I.e either got married to an American who was not approved by their family, or got pregnant and were ashamed to come back to Nigeria.

3.those who did not graduate from university especially after being funded heavily by Nigerian scholarships (a classic case of her friend who was sent to study medicine but dropped out and later switched to nursing which was considered a "nonsensical course" in Nigeria back then)

4. those who adopted "bad American habits" that were too embarrassing to return home with.

5. Those who were naturally crazy/daring, looking for adventure and independence from culture and traditions,

However most Nigerians who went to school in the US back then mostly returned because Nigeria was actually very prosperous. Jobs, welfare etc...

P.S
She said American Universities were very easy to get into as a Nigerian, because the Nigerian education system was directly equivalent to British education standards, which was far thorough and had a classic background as compared to American education standards back then.
So it was more prestigious to go to a British University than an American University/college in the 70's. Which of course were harder to get into.

u said the truth

maternal:


You're naive if you think your kids will find success in Nigeria. This isn't about money or a job. This is about SARS, a lawless country, a functional society, access to the world Visa free, etc. But because you were success and was offered a job, you were too selfish to think about your children or future children's success at the time ? Such as what if they won't be as fortunate as myself ? 20 years from now your children will be making a thread like this. Its not too late. Try to get out.

If yours can't find success and happiness in Nigeria, mine will. They are not limited to Nigeria alone. Their success could come from any where. Moreover, they were all born in US and are citizen.

If their success resides here, so be it. If it is abroad, so be it. The summary is that I will give them the necessary support to discover their talents and where the successes and happiness lie. If you are projecting Nigeria of 2045 to be worse, then too bad. People will still live in Nigeria at that time and be fulfilled and successful

Success and happiness are not destination thing. They are personal, irrespective of your place of residence. I don't blame those that wants to leave but don't lampoon those that have equally found reason to stay. It is all about choices and we live by the choices we make.

As for your prediction that my kids will regret not leaving Nigeria, may be that is what you have envisaged for yours. Mine will have no cause to regret anything. My own father formed me to be successful anywhere, same way I shall form mine to be and the baton will continue to be passed from one generation to another.

Agreed that we have numerous issues in Nigeria, such is not peculiar to Nigeria. Happiness and personal contentment matters irrespective of where you are.

Focusmind:


If yours can't find success and happiness in Nigeria, mine will. They are not limited to Nigeria alone. Their success could come from any where. Moreover, they were all born in US and are citizen.

If their success resides here, so be it. If it is abroad, so be it. The summary is that I will give them the necessary support to discover their talents and where the successes and happiness lie. If you are projecting Nigeria of 2045 to be worse, then too bad. People will still live in Nigeria at that time and be fulfilled and successful

Success and happiness are not destination thing. They are personal, irrespective of your place of residence. I don't blame those that wants to leave but don't lampoon those that have equally found reason to stay. It is all about choices and we live by the choices we make.

As for your prediction that my kids will regret not leaving Nigeria, may be that is what you have envisaged for yours. Mine will have no cause to regret anything. My own father formed me to be successful anywhere, same way I shall form mine to be and the baton will continue to be passed from one generation to another.

Agreed that we have numerous issues in Nigeria, such is not peculiar to Nigeria. Happiness and personal contentment matters irrespective of where you are.

I stopped reading when you said your kids were born in the US. You've already secured one foot out of naija just in case. Guys like you I salute. Come and do your thing in naija. You have your escape. But stop forming like you have all your eggs in naija. Don't form patriotic, while making sure your kids secured American citizenship. I'm talking about those who really only have Nigeria as their only country.

Kekereekun123:
There are many of them like that. Today their kids are suffering

absolutely and many will still make the mistake.

Focusmind:


If yours can't find success and happiness in Nigeria, mine will. They are not limited to Nigeria alone. Their success could come from any where. Moreover, they were all born in US and are citizen.

If their success resides here, so be it. If it is abroad, so be it. The summary is that I will give them the necessary support to discover their talents and where the successes and happiness lie. If you are projecting Nigeria of 2045 to be worse, then too bad. People will still live in Nigeria at that time and be fulfilled and successful

Success and happiness are not destination thing. They are personal, irrespective of your place of residence. I don't blame those that wants to leave but don't lampoon those that have equally found reason to stay. It is all about choices and we live by the choices we make.

As for your prediction that my kids will regret not leaving Nigeria, may be that is what you have envisaged for yours. Mine will have no cause to regret anything. My own father formed me to be successful anywhere, same way I shall form mine to be and the baton will continue to be passed from one generation to another.

Agreed that we have numerous issues in Nigeria, such is not peculiar to Nigeria. Happiness and personal contentment matters irrespective of where you are.

you already have a huge alternative which most Nigerians are craving and dying to get.The way things are going in Nigeria,I don't see it getting better anytime soon. And yes, I am talking about 20 to 30years time..

maternal:


I think he should state the year his dad graduated. But some are still returning now, and some are still asking if they should migrate out of Nigeria. The one's who have the means. There's a lot of truth to what you wrote. Other elders have have said the same. But I still feel it comes down to selfishness and not having the ability to plan ahead.

Very true at the bolded.
My mom has travelled the globe in her prime
When i finished school and wanted to process travelling, she never supported, she said and i quote "You are the type of child that if you travel, you will forget us and not return" i was young and I couldn't persuade her otherwise.

Thankfully, her friend whose children are all in Canada called her one day and asked her why she was allowing her brilliant child waste away.

When she told me the statement, I took it upon myself to research, found nairaland travel section and I thank God cos i am 50% done. Praying for speedy processing, now my mom is the Ginger.

I keep telling her, PR allows for me to come back home cos she keeps reiterating that statement. Now i am older and wiser, i know that statement wasn't said outta care but from a place of selfishness.

What's the point of having your kids around you, if your friend sees them as individuals 'wasting away' SMH

And many of our folks still have this mentality of abroad, though End SARS opened their eyes

maternal:
He obviously bought the "naija go betta" scam.

lol