[size=14pt]Author Unknown
Hello Nijarians & Nagode to my brothers and sisters,
I heard you all enjoyed my sworn in seremony Sfich. As you all know, EFCC is behind our arses, I had to declare my wealth, walahi talahi, I don’t own zat much, since I have been in Politics, I have only managed to embezzle, just over one billion naira, compare to Obasanjo, my mentor’s wealth, I am still a poor man. I am not promising  my wealth will not increase in another six months time, another extra One billion Naira is not bad for a six month work, think about it. Look at my citizens; its hard work, trying to rule humans with the talents of jungle mentalities, so ekuse me while I pay myself another one billion naira in six months time for over stressing myself.

Ze money is in my account right now; I thought I would forward it, zince I am still going to be ruling Monkeys for the next four years. I zill have to travel every two weeks to Germany, to cure my stress. That’s why you will find Nigerian Presidents do not get wrinkles or age before they leave office, unlike our Western friends such as Tony Blair and Bush, take a look at Blair, he has turned to an old man, all becarse he has been akused of putting his own people in danger by fighting a war which does not concern the British. Then you have the honours-for-cash  scandals in Britain; Tony was caught accepting bribe from Playboy founder Hugh Hefner, zis little corruption cost Tony Blair to resign. In my country, we just over look such attitudes, unless you are poor, for a poor man, zey get the Sharia treatment.

I beg of you not to be hard on me, I have to send the First lady out to Tommy Hilfilger for special Haute Couture for the first lady, I promise we wont use the whole budget of the Fedural Repablic of  Nijaria for the First lady’s wardrobe. Now I am the president, I can jet around the world as I like, insha Allahu. Let me tell you a secret, I really do not know how to rule a country, but I prayed to Allah this morning and Allah told me to visit ze emirs and imams, they have Kola Nuts which will point me to the North, West, South and East of Nijaria, the Kola Nuts will direct me every morning on how to rule Nijaria.  One Nigeria, One Sharia, One Yar’Adua.
President Yar’Adua.[/size]

atleast this 1st lady ll spend money on her wardrobe and not surgeons so she ll live longer.

yeah

Please Stop sterotyping Northeners.

the prob we ve with the hausa feofle is that they cant fronounce the word letter "fee"
nice one bro!!
u got me rollin on the floor!!
we r in trouble in nigeria if its like that!
we wud soon seperate!

Aisha na one is stiriotiping Northerners, we all have accents, dis is to make shua that Yaradau work good. ya see!

Hello Nairalanders, Let's us not quareel on this issue at hand but face the reality. Assets declaration is nothing but a camouflage. There is none of our immediate past governors has nothing less than 10 times (10x) what President Yar'adua declared. Put yourself in any governors or non-governor's shoes, if you have one million in your account, will you ever declare to the public that you have 200,000:00 at your disposal. You will only declare to the public a sectional parts of your cash/assests. I guess what the president declare is 1/20th of of his assests. Who knows what he has in his other accounts of his not to talk of his children accounts. Most of our leaders open different accounts in children and relations names to avoid being detected when it comes to tracing. We are all exposed and knowledgeable in Nigeria, let no one deceive us with assessts declaration. My people, shine your high clearly. A word is enough for the wise. Remain blessed all!