As a child, there were a whole lot of things I hated while growing up. I know I know, hate is a strong word but somethings I was too shy to associate myself with it.

1. My name AMUCHE: Don’t get me wrong, I mean who hates his or her name? I did. However, before you crucify me, I actually had a genuine reason. It was bad enough that people made fun of my surname *NWOSA* (well technically some still do), it’s shortened version of Nwaolisa- which means “child of God”, of course I wasn’t bothered after all it’s not my name but I did when it was my turn to be mocked.

“Amauchechukwu or Amuche” which means “do you know the will of God”. Because of the concept of Olili Udaume (igbo people will understand this more, it’s basically saying 2 vowel can’t be together, hence from Amuche to Amuche ). Sweet name right Well they didn’t think so, rather resorted to calling me “Amu” (penis in English). I tried correcting them or pick a fight over this but failed, I get it gives them orgasm so how do I expect them to stop. I was practically called the male reproductive organ for quite a long time �

Side effect: I hated my name until recently, when I made peace with the fact that “this is your name, wear it with pride and I did”.

2. My head and face: Narrating and thinking about this now it’s actually funny. Anyways, y’all already know I have a big coconut head, but what you don’t know is this, it’s of 3 parts.
I actually don’t know if it’s natural or by accident but my skull kind of deepened in the middle. Boy I was mocked, still remember how I was referred to as *Isi Face cap* (face cap head), especially any time I get a new haircut, ( God will Shaa punish Oga faze for always barbing me rubbish), it’s visible to anybody that cares to look. I tried covering it up by tricking then, told them that 1st part is for brain, which explains why I always take the first position, the 2nd is for storing excess knowledge and the 3rd is a secret, abd the believed �.

Next was my face, I always look like egg roll whenever I smile, I mean I have big cheeks which grows bigger when I laugh or smile. My big flat nose didn’t help matters either, it didn’t escape their sharp tongues. ImagineImagine a little girl with a round face, big head and cheeks, with shiny eyes, that was my signature look then.

Side effect: I stopped smiling for quite a time, but later accepted my fate, now I smile a lot more than a cheshire cat.

3. Physical appearance: Tell me what to do with a big fat ass wiggle wiggle. Well in my case, it was a big fat breast. Growing as a kid, I was actually an early bloomer, and was ways compared to letter P. The upper part of my body is slightly bigger that the rest, my broad shoulders and bad posture wasn’t helping either. Was even called a lion, not in the king of jungle way but because it’s upper body is same as mine.


Side effect: I was shy and cried a lot cause the insults were actually much, childhood experiences was hell for me.

However right now, I've learnt, still learning not to care anymore.








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