My boyfriend is christain,and am a muslim. Is it islamically allowed to marry him. Ild appreciate your advice. Thanks.

dadamsel:

My boyfriend is christain,and am a muslim. Is it islamically allowed to marry him. Ild appreciate your advice. Thanks.

Assalamualaikum warahmtullahi wabarakatuhu,

No sister its not allowed for Muslim women to marry non-Muslim men. Moreover Both Men and women are not supposed to be 'Dating' according to Islam. It will lead to major sins. Be very careful Sister. Pray to Allah, and you will get a really good man as your spouse InshAllah.

Thanks azaruddeen. Please enlighten me. If people are not supposed to date,are we just supposed to marry at first sight? Back to my post,we love each other truly and he is Godfearing. Its all quite confusing.

dadamsel:

If people are not supposed to date,are we just supposed to marry at first sight?

No Rather Islamically you can meet the person on proposal with the presence of their gaurdians.

dadamsel:

My boyfriend is christain,and am a muslim. Is it islamically allowed to marry him. Ild appreciate your advice. Thanks.

This marriage wud only work If:neither of you is religious.

If you both care-less abt God then u guys are good to go.

Personal advice:Its always better to stick with someone who shares same sentiments and faith.

dadamsel:

Thanks azaruddeen. Please enlighten me. If people are not supposed to date,are we just supposed to marry at first sight? Back to my post,we love each other truly and he is Godfearing. Its all quite confusing.

Love is one of the least ingredients for a successful marriage.Infact a marriage can as well survive without love,ask your grandmother

Love only seem to matter during dating but once u enter that marriage threshold,sis . . .You need more of understanding,maturity,mutual respect and less love.

When this love is gone,what else is there to hold on to?

BTWN,why are u bothered abt this now or rather who is bothered abt this issue now,You,him or family?

The fact that its bothering you is enough pointer that something is wrong.

May God guide u to make the best decision for yourself.Amin

Azzarudin,honestly i don't understand. How can u arrange to meet someone you have not meet?

Ify,thanks for your advice. He is Godfearing but doesn't attend church. Am more religious than he is and even i am not so religious. I strive to say my daily prayers. My family doesn't have a problem with it neither does his. Ify,what if most of those other factors are present,like understanding for instance? I read somewhere on this forum where someone said,being a muslim is not only about the quaran. Abrahim was a muslim in God's sight or something like that.

dadamsel:

Azzarudin,honestly i don't understand. How can u arrange to meet someone you have not meet?

Assalamualaikum,

Sorry sis for not being very descriptive. I will give you an example how things work in my place. When the parents think its time for their son/daughter to get married, they start searching for a bride/groom. They spread the word to family members, colleagues, friends etc. Then by word someone will bring a proposal to the parents. They enquire about the bride/groom, about the job, manners, family etc. Then if it seem compatible the parents and the elders meet up. Then if both parties agree the guy and the girl met by the parents. Then the guy and the girl meet up with their parents. They will be let to have a chat privately. Then if all is well the elders meet up and the date of Nikkah is fixed.

You might be thinkin how in the world will one choose a life partner with just a few meetings. Well i have seen a lot of marraiges done after 'dating' break up. And I ve seen very few arranged marriages ending up in divorce. Do you know why? Its coz when 'dating' the couple show their best charecters to each other, the truth won't be known until marriage. As ify already mentioned during 'dating' both the couple will be blind with love and not realistic.

Next you might be thinking how will one trust a stranger to get married to.? Well trust in Allah, if one does things in the way Allah prescribed, Allah will show mercy to us. Also arranged marriage will not be like 'love marriage', both the couple will be willing to sacrifice as they dont know what to expect initially. But in 'dating' marriage the expectation is high after marriage, but usually a downfall in relationship is seen.

May Allah guide you in the right path,  give you patience and bless you with a good spouse. Ameen.


And whoever is mindful of Allah, He will grant them a way out, and will provide for them in ways unimagined. And whoever places their trust in Allah, then Allah is their sufficiency. Allah’s affair will surely come to pass–and Allah has made a clear decree for everything.
(Quran:Surat Al-Talaq #65 v2-3)

Thank you.

my dear sister ify is a real scholar in this matter. may Allah increase you in knowledge. Amin. brother azharrudiin is also correct.

to the poser; if you are struggling to make your daily prayers, do you need the person whose action will discourage you even from putting in that struggle? the christians say not to be unyoke with 'unbelievers'. muslim is an unbeliever in this case.

we know that your 'boyfriend' dont care. do you have not to care too?

if his parents dont mind, is it right for your parents to imitate his parents, too, especially when there is Quran and Hadith/Sunnah as guide in every matter?

why would your dating not be inclusive of your guidance; your parent or a male in your bloodline that will make sure your boyfriend will not milk your cow without paying for it and caring to keep it well fed? i use the cow here as a metaphor, because if you are doing what legal husband and wife are doing, without a nikka [islamic marriage ceremony], what is the spirit of islam there in you?

fear and be conscious of Allah.

if the man wants you, and you cant wait for a muslim to come along, then you and your parents should tell him about Allah and make sure he becomes a true muslim, first. then marry him and you will not be violating the law of Allah. he your muslim husband will make your struggle to make 5 daily prayers easy, even a thing of the past, since he and you will hurry to make prayers.

imagine if you marry him while he remains a non muslim. he will not appreciate anything you do for the cause of Allah. you may just make wudu and it is at that time he wants to be your husband, because your rules are completely different from his. he will become your shayatin, right there in the house and in the bedroom, because anything may go for him, while you are on a guideline.

The problem with muslim male and female youngs are that one set her expectation too high, forgetting Allah, while imitating non muslims. the other is so timid to let his intention known while those who have no rules of engagement get to our precious sisters without any problems.

i pray that we prioritize our affairs trying to obey our Creator. Amin.

Thank you.

dadamsel:

My boyfriend is Christian,and am a Muslim. Is it Islamic allowed to marry him. Ild appreciate your advice. Thanks.

Read this;
Marry for these reasons:

1=For Beauty sake

2= For Money sake

3=For Religious sake

4=For Family sake.

He now continue; Be ware, you need to marry a religious man/woman,
THINK THINK THINK about this. God bless