You stay in a three bedroom flat and you allow your 36 year old close friend who had accommodation challenges to stay with you pending when he raise money and find an accommodation.
Now your company has transfered you to another city far distance state that will entail that your coming back to visit your family atleast for now may be once in a month or more probably on weekends or during holiday until you know how far the transfer will go as you can't relocate your family and your wife works in a company.You have three kids,not yet grown up

What will you do as you are about to leave for the new state regarding your family with your male friend. Is it advisable to leave him with your family or to tell him to pack and go. Can you be comfortable allowing him stay together with your wife in your absence?. It's not that you don't trust your wife but is it advisable to leave them stay together without you in the house. Please sincere advise is needed

If you keep yam with goat, wetin you think say go happen?

Guy tell him to find somewhere else.

Don't do it. Help him with some money to get accommodation somewhere else.

What nonsense. I will tell the friend to pls MOVE Out because a family member is coming to help out the wife.

Friendship is what will kill some people. Stupid loyalty when you don't know the heart of who you are pledging loyalty to. How can someone even consider such nonsense!

See this is the problem when you help people and they don't know their boundaries....
Your friend should know he has to pack out.
You can't allow it.
Even if you thrust both... People will still talk.

This one is strong, biko wait for the elders.

But in my opinion, you know this friend better than anyone so you are in perfect position to advise yourself.

The best I can do for a friend in such need if I have wife and kids in my home is to help him raise money for his rent but for me to accommodate him, he must be a brother from another mother so this won't be an issue.

If this friend is not type that can take a bullet for you, please tell him politely to move and help him with some money if possible.

By the way, what's your wife's opinion?

zangodangolo:
You stay in a three bedroom flat and you allow your 36 year old close friend who had accommodation challenges to stay with you pending when he raise money and find an accommodation.
Now your company has transfered you to another city far distance state that will entail that your coming back to visit your family atleast for now may be once in a month or more probably on weekends or during holiday until you know how far the transfer will go as you can't relocate your family and your wife works in a company.You have three kids,not yet grown up

What will you do as you are about to leave for the new state regarding your family with your male friend. Is it advisable to leave him with your family or to tell him to pack and go. Can you be comfortable allowing him stay together with your wife in your absence?. It's not that you don't trust your wife but is it advisable to leave them stay together without you in the house. Please sincere advise is needed

Even your adult blood brother shouldn't be allowed in your home when you are around, how much more when you are not around.

Now, you are talking about a stranger friend. Do you even have a girl child? Why do people put themselves in a tempting position.

For your own good, the good of your wife and children, help him find accommodation elsewhere.

But, if you know you trust him and your wife so much, you can let him be, after all, people share apartment.

It would be better if there's another grown up person in that apartment apart from your wife and the man. This will help forestall the chances of anything going wrong.

Your friend may get the wrong signal when you ask him to leave, but you don't really have to consider emotions when taking precautions. It's better to be suspicious and be safe than to be trusting and be betrayed.

The man should be assertive enough to tell his friend to find alternative accommodation as it does not bode well, him living with his wife and children in his absence as he needs to avoid confusing his children with who the male authority figure of the house is. With reality of sexual abuse even committed by relatives, one has to be very cautious over who they allow into their homes.

A 36 year old man staying with a married friend who has 3 young children should know that after a week of being sheltered, he should move out to any of his relatives or bachelor friend's home if he is yet to get his own place.

Yes. If you can't trust your wife and friend, or if they can't justify your confidence in leaving them, up to the extent of living together in an apartment for such duration in your absence, then they do not merit the wife and friend tags and your closeness.

Anyway, thank God for my aversion for perfidious people, be you a relation or outsider, because the very moment I observe an atom of it in you, I rock your boat and damn the attack or condemnation of every element who may support you.

your matter tie gele, all I see from the comments above is no friend should be trusted. lesson learnt

The friend should find another accommodation.

Hmmmm, think well oo. I don't think it's advisable leaving him. You may regret the act and probably crash the marriage for di.ck and pu.ssy have no boundaries. Worse still,you may not even know when something started happening in your back, who will tell you - the man or the wife?. Yam and goat no dey stay alone oo. Forget anybody that will be advising you contrary.

Alternatively,if you want to leave him,you can go and collect one Yoruba diabolic medicine called "magu"before you travel and place on your wife so that if they make love behind your back something will happen to them instantly to the knowledge of everybody.

I don't think it's right allowing a friend move in to your house as a married man in the first place. It's better to avoid some situations in the first place.

Evaluate the situation and make your best decision.

Op it depends on the type of friend u have, if your friend is a very disciplined guy I mean sexually and emotionally even if your wife brings herself to him she won't still succeed
But if he is weakling and SIMPs sorry na your name. I HV hosted a friend wife before for like months and also a brother wife they all enjoyed their stay bcs they all know that I play a lot but I don't give room for romance not to tall of my brother's wife and friend

If your friend is not wise enough to move out without being told, then you should be worried.

This sounds super weird , for a man to agree to that

Why do people use their own hand to cause problem for themselves?

As one of those who commented asked, if you keep yam and goat wetin go happen?

Even a priest can fall. It's not about title. It's about wisdom.

Your friend has to leave. Do it politely. He can't stay. Period. Well, na your choice go make. Not ours.

Don't say you were not told.

I know this might be a very difficult situation for you now...

But truth be told, without even telling your friends, at least he should k ow himself that, you can't leave him and his wife alone in that house...

Not because of trust issue, but believe me, this is Nigeria, people would use you as a topic everyday...

I wish you well in your final decision.

Guy why did you have to bring my matter here instead of approaching me directly? Well no problem,I got your point. Just give me about 3 to 4days to arrange another place to stay and thanks for the online embarrassment.

This na temptation....with a little confusion - in P-Sqaure's voice

Presently no enough money to assist him and pay for accommodation and he don't have money as well to do so.

Are all his family members and friends dead?

@Sterope
Are all his family members and friends dead?



@me
Good question my fine lady. One chilled Pepsi for you.

femmoy:
Guy why did you have to bring my matter here instead of approaching me directly? Well no problem,I got your point. Just give me about 3 to 4days to arrange another place to stay and thanks for the online embarrassment.

If truly you are the friend and not someone else catching cruise, what wrong has op done? If he doesn't know what to do, he has an option to ask for opinion or idea... So which one come be online embarrassment?