1. Always have your mobile and data on:

A number of job seekers can be likened to a barren woman seeking the fruit of the womb but isn’t engaging in coitus. Most times they come with the “data is expensive” excuse, but the question is, wouldn’t you rather be hungry and not miss an urgent email/call from HR or a potential helper?

If you still switch data off to manage data today, you’re a mumu man. Buy data today and network with people online, internet is the bridge to meet people you’d never probably meet offline. Information is not only power, it is expensive. Surf the internet ruggedly, the information needed to launch you into your wealth is lurking around. Most importantly, reduce your visit to porn sites just so your data lasts.

2. Your not so important bad etiquettes.
You pee’d in the company restroom but guess what, you’re that nasty individual who leaves urine droplets on toilet seats.
OR you’re that nasty individual who leave lunch tables messy and can’t even throw away wraps of the biscuit had
OR you like to fart in your office with reckless abandon not minding if another employee might walk in on your pregnancy-aborting fart
OR you like to subconsciously pick your nose to eat
OR you like to subconsciously touch your armpit to sniff
OR you like to retrieve phlegms from your throat either to spit it out or to swallow it back like a snack,
Stop that bullcrap today!

3. You have 10 seconds to impress your colleagues/anyone

Have you noticed how dogs sniff each other everytime they meet? Human brains do that subliminally. People’s brains constantly lookout for DRESSING, NEATNESS and CONFIDENCE. The first rating someone gives you in their mind is the best score you’d ever achieve. Once you score yourself low on the first meeting, you’ll forever struggle to keep up.

If you have a nasty body odour on your first day at work, and you did a good job “perfuming” every office at work with it; it doesn’t matter if you invest 1 million in Gucci perfumes afterwards, you are still that employee that once stank like a pig.

Personally when people perceive someone who can’t groom him/herself properly or probably has body odour, their brain is already making lots of assumptions: “she is really not that bright for her to stink like this”, “he probably won’t manage his portfolio well if he can’t manage his own appearance” etc.

Don’t be fooled, your room has an odour you’re used to and can’t perceive; and only visitors can. The same thing goes with your body. Always assume your body has its natural odour and hence always wear a deodorant and perfume.

Confidence is another thing to watch out for. Confidence will earn you a lot of corporate respect. This reflects in your composure, from your firm handshake to the eye contacts you make to your eloquence. Human brains are wired to believe people with these qualities are superior to them and hence accord them respect. This trickles down to the unofficial aspect, a girl you cannot look into her eyes when talking to her already perceives you as substandard to her level. It’s not the words men say most times that matters, but the composure, body language and most importantly eye contact.

Culturally Nigerians have been taught from childhood not to look at elders in their eyes during conversations; this will however paint you as a timid unprofessional rat in the corporate environment where you’d lead people the age of your grandfather. Be bold, stand straight and firm with your heads up, the way you carry yourself is the way others will carry you. If your physical stature/composure depicts that of a loser/not-too-important individual/shy rat, people will come at you with all manners of bullshit.

4. Substandard Communication values:

Communication (verbal) is very important and it reflects the intelligence of the subject. If you’re in a leadership position, your authority is a huge factor of how you can deliver directives in short concise statements.

“I need you to backup files from last month’s transactions”

is different from

“Uhm, do you have time? Can you help me to back up files from uhm last month’s transactions”.

The former is firm and direct, while the latter shows you have issues communicating directives. It’s not pride, it’s the corporate environment. There is a time to be humble, there is another to throw jokes here and there and there is time to be serious and firm.


If you want to excel in the corporate world, piety and culture must be set aside. Be witty in moderation, joke once in a while, stop laughing like you overdosed on laughing gas, avoid forming gangs/groups in offices, and most importantly, never take bullshvt from anyone. A bullshvt condone today is an invitation to 10 more. Be corporately aggressive and have standards. Let people know you as the Mr/Mrs.xxxxxx who doesn’t take no nonsense than the jovial humble Mr/Mrs.xxxxx who is disrespected by all.