Small rain, weather for two.

Klass99:

Hmmmm I think you posted into my quote hence the reason you post isnt showing here.

Honestly, I'm one of those who strongly believe everyone should be allowed to have a go at their conviction. See, while I think your reason for not wanting kids is quite insubstantial, I still think you shouldn't have kids if you dont want them.

Yes they are goodness personified until they grow old enough to have capabilities of pre-adult or adult reasoning/independence but this is just part of human developmental stages. We are not made to take our instructions from other people for life....we grow adults too just like our parents.

Now about those ones that grow to become menaces to their parents and the societal at large, they are actually in minority. Again, this is another natural phenomenon as we arent all made to have the same temperaments or dispositions towards life. There will be the good, the bad and everything inbetween.

Take my grandparents for instance, they had six....none of them still lives at home. In fact, 4 have been out of the country for as long as I can remember while the two here are women that started a family away from their parents gazillion years ago. My parents had 4 and none of us are still at home as we all didnt even return after NYSC. I'm sure a lot of families are like mine while the drug failures you described are few in some families. To make this even
clearer, do a random sampling of 10 families you know in places like Mushin, VI, Surulere and anywhere else you know to see how many children past the ages of 25yrs are still living at home, especially in this our country where poverty is making parents expectant of allowance from their children once they hit age 50yrs. How will majority fail to launch given that kind of responsibility?

Besides, if we dont procreate, in another 40years when we become seniors, there would be no workforce to carry on the economy/society.....remember, we would still need the economy/society to cater for us in our old age. The nurse/doctor/farmer/mechanic/police/etc today will retire in another 30yrs to be succeeded by the baby today. There is even one Asian country that made a one child rule one time that later regretted it....they got to a point where their dependency ratio was far more than the workforce could carry and they had to reverse the rule by encouraging young people to have children, paying for childcare, education, toys etc. Why? We need to replicate ourselves to carry one the human race . Unless we want to end it in our time.

Again, due to nature, personal dispositions and even economy, it is understandable that not all of us would have them and that is fine. But the few of us willing to, we should go for it responsibility and not create more advoc while trying to replicate ourselves.

Those who could not afford kids should embrace family planning. I for one is only interested in 1 and would do 2 if the oga insist by God's grace. May God help us.

Klass99:

Hian....what happened to quoting? Your post isnt still showing.

Ok....I actually thought your reason is because they usually turn out bad but now that you mentioned its beyond that....by all means it's ok, it's really ok. I of all people understand the reason behind disinterest. So when I said your reason was insubstantial, I thought it was solely because of the fear of when they grow up. Nothing do you....may you find that good man that would align with all your ducks in a row.

As for me....even if na one, I must have. I love kids too much not to. If push turns to shove, I'm so adopting....geskia.

mrjojo:
I'm always very happy to see a Nigerian with this kind of mindset, it very rare in a society like ours

Thanks brother

adeniyi65:
Over sometimes now.i have been noted by friends and family as someone with sudden weird reasoning.my reasoning isn't weird if am to evaluate myself.its just that am more logical in my tactics to life, subduing religion rules to some extent and finally going against the usual cultural and society norm that aids the retrogression of the black communities.

That was one of the reason that led me into this reasoning: is having a child a must for us? Going by religion insight,it encourages us to multiply in multitudes and our society and culture never give less.their major point of observation is if you die without giving birth,then you are nothing to the world and the linage to your name will perish for eternity.does this really worth standing on?

To me i will prever a name over a birth.Thomas Edison is known today not by his linage of children but by his contribution to the world through his light invention.Chairman Mao, Malcolm X, Mahatma Gandhi, Martin Luther King Jr.karl benz and the rest are remembered in the heart of every historians and the lovers of documentaries through out the globe not giving any dime about their ladder/offspring kids if even exist.there is more to my submission but don't let me do all the talking.logically at your own view.what do you think about the topic.

The last time I checked it is no crime if you don't want to have children.

Their is no law against not wanting a child.

You don't fall and die just because you don't want to have children.

So OP it is not compulsory. If you want children have them and if you don't it is your choice.

It's not a must.

Klass99:

Madam Klass99 at it again, I just love your stand on this matter and how you don't want to bulge irrespective of what others say, one question I want to ask is have you informed your parents about this and what is their reaction? Cos my own many cases with my parents just ended with a family meeting on my head not long ago, to the extent that I refused to leave my room to meet with them and they all came in to forcefully have their meeting with me there. Me I want child/ren sha but I need to sort out my life first as I don't want to suffer my offspring when me myself never even enjoy life despite my age all in the name of pleasing parents who all they care for is just to bear grandparent.

.

Klass99:


If you are self aware, you know what you want and you know the things that light up your heart, you can't be swayed by what people think or say.

After all - Your life is yours to build, it is not for others to steer.

Fortunately my parents are not plagued with a myopic mentality, they didn't react negatively or poorly to the news. They just said okay, but pray about it and pray for God's will to be done and it was EOD, then we moved the conversation along to other topics, they've never brought it up with me again.

I just love and respect them, for the sort of people they are. I am not sure any of us were meant to be Africans/Nigerians sef, from the way we think and act

I just exhausted all my envies on you, my parent is the direct opposite despite them being the reason for what I am passing through, or how do you explain that a parent practically told their children not to relate with people not even close relatives even to their later years right into adulthood and suddenly they want you to get married like they have a spouse kept for you somewhere who you can relate and bond with instantly.

adeniyi65:

Thanks for the question.i already have one who is now in age 4 while his dad is now drawing near to being 29 years of age.my submission is that people shouldn't see raising kid as a must.seeing it as a must hinder dreams of many that should have delay it for a promising invention. and it makes who is not eligible to have a child by his/her financial strength or hearth issues to drag children into the world.i see nothing fruitful in trying to be different or impressing others but giving dignity to someone's name sounds so distinctly promising.

Am pleased with this ur comment and that's why I want to reply because my immediate brother fell into this category whereby he is fucking brilliant back then in secondary school and both of us do talk about achieving greater dreams in life through education..

But he mistakenly impregnated a lady and till date for d past 12 years he had been struggling to feed and all his forthcoming dreams are diminished and ow he look up toe to beg for money to feed d family of 6

And he is baking himself till date ..
So i think giving birth shouldn't b aist or rather someone shouldn't accept societal pressure to do scuba when u aren't ready yet