Hi people,

How will you handle this if you are in my shoes

An elderly woman I respect so much recommended/matchmade I and one young man who is searching for a wife.

We got talking for a while and finally we met over the weekend for the first time.

He is smitten and expresses joy while gushing about how perfect I am for him.

He is already planning for our next meeting and all but here is the problem.

I don't really like him. He isn't my type of guy.

Even though he is a nice person but I don't like him.

He has been calling and I can't take his calls.

I don't like wasting people's time or leading them in when I know I don't want them.

Do I just ghost him until he gets the message that I am not interested or I should just tell him straight up I don't want him.

I'm tongue-tied and feel he will be dashed if I told him straight up that I don't want him because of how excited and enthusiastic he is about the while thing.


What should I do?

I feel bad right now and please don't judge me.

I haven't taken anything from him because I know some of you will be like "after eating his money"

I know he will feel bad and I don't know how to approach this.

I'm not good at relationship stuffs and all.

What would you do if you were in my shoes please.

As for the woman that connected us, I don't even know how to approach her.

I am exhausted!!

Jsaviour:
Hi people,

How will you handle this if you are in my shoes

An elderly woman I respect so much recommended/matchmade I and one young man who is searching for a wife.

We got talking for a while and finally we met over the weekend for the first time.

He is smitten and expresses joy while gushing about how perfect I am for him.

He is already planning for our next meeting and all but here is the problem.

I don't really like him. He isn't my type of guy.

Even though he is a nice person but I don't like him.

He has been calling and I can't take his calls.

I don't like wasting people's time or leading them in when I know I don't want them.

Do I just ghost him until he gets the message that I am not interested or I should just tell him straight up I don't want him.

I'm tongue-tied and feel he will be dashed if I told him straight up that I don't want him because of how excited and enthusiastic he is about the while thing.


What should I do?

I feel bad right now and please don't judge me.

I haven't taken anything from him because I know some of you will be like "after eating his money"

I know he will feel bad and I don't know how to approach this.

I'm not good at relationship stuffs and all.

What would you do if you were in my shoes please.

As for the woman that connected us, I don't even know how to approach her.

I am exhausted!!

Since someone introduced u...ghosting him will not only look like disrespect to the guy but the woman especially...
Send him a text that he’s a great guy...but that you are not open for a relationship now but you ddnt want to be rude to the woman who introduced him...
I don’t think you need to give the woman feedback about it, since it’s not like u asked her to do it....but if you want to, you can just thank her for having you in mind

advanceDNA:


Since someone introduced u...ghosting him will not only look like disrespect to the guy but the woman especially...
Send him a text that he’s a great guy...but that you are not open for a relationship now but you ddnt want to be rude to the woman who introduced him...
I don’t think you need to give the woman feedback about it, since it’s not like u asked her to do it....but if you want to, you can just thank her for having you in mind

Thanks!! You are right though.

I need a serious relationship with a Muslimah pretty and has a good attitude and also have time she can chat me on 08105781625 WhatsApp

[quote author=Jsaviour post=107894104]

Thanks!! You are right though.[/quote
Any update?

[quote author=Timekeeper post=108051802][/quote]

Yes, it's sorted now. He didn't take it so well but it didn't turn out bad.

Jsaviour:


Yes, it's sorted now. He didn't take it so well but it didn't turn out bad.

Put on your wifi, ad I hope u r not the type Dt has set a very high standard for men sha

Timekeeper:


Put on your wifi, ad I hope u r not the type Dt has set a very high standard for men sha

Which one is put on WiFi again?

Nothing like high standard. A woman knows what she wants just as men do.

It's a simple case of have sense, be visionary, be productive and be a life-long learner.

It's always difficult to connect with most Nigerian men if you are sapiosexual.

Jsaviour:


Which one is put on WiFi again?

Nothing like high standard. A woman knows what she wants just as men do.

It's a simple case of have sense, be visionary, be productive and be a life-long learner.

It's always difficult to connect with most Nigerian men if you are sapiosexual.

Hmm.. In summary, u need a man who is even intelligent than you are...

And are you saying Nigerian men find a lady Dt is sapiosexual as a threat to their dominance

Timekeeper:


Hmm.. In summary, u need a man who is even intelligent than you are...

And are you saying Nigerian men find a lady Dt is sapiosexual as a threat to their dominance

I think you misunderstood my point

I said that a sapiosexual lady will find it difficult connecting with most Nigerian men cos most Nigerian men don't care about any other aspect of their life except money.

So when the money has her own money, what else does the man has to offer if all he could bring to the table is money?

Moreso, this has nothing to do with male dominance. There is even no such thing as dominance in marriage or humanity.

Man was never told to have Dominion over his fellow man but over every other living things including principalities and powers. Refer to Genesis 1:26-28

Marriage is a partnership between a man and a woman with a leader who is the man.

Now let me define leadership so you will agree with me that most Nigerian men are mistaken in the issue if marriage and power.

Leadership is a combination of qualities and skills that make others want to follow someone's direction. The act of helping people succeed by inspiring and uniting them behind a common purpose. Or a process of influence which maximizes the efforts of others towards the achievement of a goal.

And before one can be a leader to others, he must first master self-leadership

What is self leadership?
Self leadership is the ability to consciously influence your thoughts and behavior in order to achieve your life goals and lead yourself to succeed. The act of intentionally guiding yourself to the point people are willing to follow you.

Leadership is about being the example but man because of his lack of knowledge has mistaken leadership to be dominance.

And that proves the point I am trying to make

Most leave every other aspects of their lives

Physical/health
Mental/emotional
Relationship/social life
Career and business
Financial
Spiritual
Education/personal development

These are all areas that require attention but unfortunately many focus on just one

Focus is mostly tilted towards Financial/money and Spiritual growth which causes an imbalance.