Finally realised that I have no business on this earth.

I have failed in every single endeavour I lay my hands on. I keep causing calamities anywhere I find myself despite being a recluse.

The more I try to endure and bear it like a man as they say, the more I keep piling up more pressures on me. Now I can barely look forward to another day. Of what use?

De*th is currently the best option... the decision made, the methods currently being reviewed.

If there's some sort of afterlife, then the earlier I go over there and begin to adapt, the better. chances are if there's a hell I'll surely be a guest.

There's nothing to prove that being alive is better for me. Only the thought of how hurt my family will be has kept me thus far but how long can I continue to be alive just to satiate the feelings of others to the detriment of my mental health?

It is time...

Time to go...

do not