Fact by David Hundeyin

A middle-aged Nigerian woman was deported from Canada in 2012. What happened next illustrates how far tall tales and sheer audacity can take one in Africa's largest country.

“This is the Facebook fan page of Ms Olukemi Omololu-Olunloyo aka Snitchlady. It's either you call my whole name or it's MsKemi or Snitchlady, a Music Industry Executive in Music Journalism and Publicity. SNITCHLADY aka "Mskemi" Ms Olukemi Omololu-Olunloyo is a Publicist, Journalist and retired Pharmacist and the CEO of Keminications Media and PR and the Kay Jeezy Kids foundation which is a NEW non profit GRASSROOTS organization mobilizing Kids in the Toronto Community in bringing PEACE to their streets.”

A little over a decade ago, before Twitter became ubiquitous, the best known platform for all-access public discourse in the Nigerian online space was a web forum called Nairaland. Nairaland was what would happen if you took Reddit and forced it to have an antichrist baby with the offspring of 4Chan and an anonymous Telegram group chat. It had useful information. It had copious amounts of utter nonsense. It had interesting and colourful characters. It had epic flame wars, some of which have continued to rage for over a decade, even as the participants change over the years. It had fun - lots of fun. It had the very worst of Nigerian humanity. It also had Musiwa.

Musiwa, or Emperor Ademusiwa as he styled himself, was a Nairaland OG and a true legend of the forum, having been a member since around 2007. Not that you would know it, because Musiwa had zero interest in engaging in normal conversation with other forum members. His sole reason for incessantly posting on Nairaland was to inform anyone who cared to listen that he was the “Premier of the Republic of Western Nigeria,” or “Emperor of the Western Region of Nigeria.” [/b]Following this declaration would ensue several megabytes of data-heavy images and satellite maps to support the existence of his fictional republic.

A newcomer to [b]Nairaland might at first see the funny side of an eccentric individual who apparently did nothing else with his time except post maps on a web forum where he talked about himself in the third person, using a grammatically terrible but strangely endearing writing style. This would quickly turn into exasperation as Musiwa’s high resolution maps and images disrupted completely unrelated conversations, and exhausted people’s data packages in the days when N1,000 could buy less than 100MB. The mods of course, banned Emperor Musiwa. Repeatedly.

5 times.

30 times.

75 times.

100 times.

It made no difference. Musiwa would simply register a new handle each time and return to post his maps and speak in the 3rd person about governing his quixotic Republic of Western Nigeria. Each one of the multiple handles he spawned would have a number after it, apparently signifying the number of times he had been banned. Upon getting to “Musiwa112”, he added a tributary handle called “Becomrich”, which did the same things as the infinite Musiwa handle - high-res images, never-ending maps, ban-resistance and all. The mods tried everything - keyword bans, IP bans, registration restrictions - but nothing worked on Emperor Musiwa.

Eventually even Nairaland founder Seun Osewa saw the funny side of it and gave up trying to banish Musiwa from the platform. [/b]Everyone learned to adjust as best they could and find ways to go around, instead of against him. [b]Nairaland was Emperor Musiwa’s world, and the rest of us were just living in it.


Kemi Olunloyo: An Overview of Nigeria’s Real Life Musiwa

In August 2012, a 48 year-old woman landed in Lagos, Nigeria. Olukemi Ajoke “Ashley” Omololu-Olunloyo had just been deported from the Canadian province of Ontario, and she was back to the land she had only briefly known as home since she was a teenager. At 14, she had left Nigeria and moved to the USA, where she lived a broadly prosaic and inauspicious life, before apparently veering into a dizzying chain of bad decisions that culminated in a failed asylum claim in Canada, and ultimately deportation to Nigeria.

Born in May 1964, Kemi was the daughter of former Oyo State governor Victor Omololu-Olunloyo. She moved Stateside as a teenager, and eventually obtained a Degree in Pharmacy at the Philadelphia College of Pharmacy and Science in 1988. She subsequently met a man, fell in love and moved to the city of Baltimore in Maryland. She would go on to have 3 kids, and really this story ought to end here. Competent Nigerian immigrant achieves stable middle class life in the USA - hardly groundbreaking stuff.

It is at this point however, that the story enters the realms of Emperor Ademusiwa, so I’m going to need you to stay with me here. No matter how puzzling or eccentric you expect this story to be, I can assure you that it is significantly worse than that. In putting this story together, I pored through hundreds of pages of news reports, blogposts, self-written hagiographies, police records, real estate records, academic verification records and every other type of documentation I could get my hands on to establish exactly who or what we are dealing with here.

Most people typically use lies, distortions, exaggerations and mischaracterisations as narrative supplements to go along with a core of things that are broadly true - a flavour cube that enhances a soup, if you will.

Kemi Olunloyo is not most people.

Like Emperor Musiwa, she is one of those rare individuals who exclusively inhabits a world of her own choosing. Where regular people use fish stories as Maggi cubes to season a pot of soup, Kemi regularly tosses hundreds of Maggi cubes into the pot and brings it to boil, occasionally tossing the odd vegetable into the bubbling chemical mass just for the shits and giggles.

Below is a short overview of some of Kemi Olunloyo’s bold and vivid claims, taken from a 2011 snapshot of her Facebook fan page. These claims range from the believable to the eye-raising to the absurd, but there is one thing they all have in common. They are all either false, misleading or overstated in such a way as to make them look like achievements. This is a good entry point into the story of one of the most headscratching characters I have ever dug into.

Profile

1. Editor and Founder of HipHossip.com (Canada's Leading Music Blog-VH1 & MTV (Canada's Leading Hip-Hop site-BET.com)
2. Former VeeJay MTV Base (MTV Africa)
3. Radio Nigeria on-air music radio personality Premier FM 93.5
4. Canadian Correspondent BET's "The Deal"
5. Music Reporter, news anchor and Talk show host since 1996 (NBC News, WBAL-TV, V103-FM and Heaven 600AM, Baltimore USA, Premier 93.5FM Ibadan Nigeria)
6. 2008 Presenter Live Urban Award (TIMA) Toronto Independent Music Award/2010 Presenter of Best Alternative Rock.
7. Member of the Board of Governors of Kingston General Hospital in Southern Ontario
8. Freelance Columnist for Central Newspaper in Oshawa, Canada, Nigerian Canadian Newspapers and Guest Columnist for the Toronto Sun.
9. Member of the Canadian Association of Recording Arts and Sciences (CARAS) The JUNO AWARDS and a voting member in the 40th JUNOS.
10. Member of the Hollywood Foreign Press (Golden Globe Awards)
11. Member of the National Academy of TV Arts and Sciences (NATAS) The Emmy Awards
12. Member of the Nigerian Association of Women Journalists (NAWOJ)

Awards

1997 Maryland's Most Beautiful People (Volunteer of the Year)
1998 America's Volunteers of the Year White House ceremony

Personal Information

Conservative commentator and media expert, Journalist, Publicist, US licensed Pharmacist (3 states), The Black Ann Coulter, The Queen of Jane Street, Toronto, EIC of HipHossip.com, MyYoungToronto Digital mag, Anti-Gun activist, Crime Victim Advocate, Youth Advocate, Author and SNITCH.

Personal Interests

Everything.

Fish Story #1 - Kemi the “Doctor”

In October 2020, I penned an investigative story about Marek Zmyslowski, the Polish tech entrepreneur who has never been short of a word or three about his time in Nigeria. The story established that Marek was a master in the 3-part conman-in-Africa grift - Be suitably foreign; Look like you know what you are doing; and Be a consummate storyteller. Marek I argued, was not simply a “liar.” He was actually more of a storyteller. The difference between a liar and a storyteller in this context, is that while the liar claims that blue is red, the storyteller mixes in the right amount of truth for their narrative to fly painlessly.

Marek for example, would never claim to have worked at say, Deutsche Bank, because it would be too easy to refute such a claim comprehensively. Instead, he claimed to have “founded Jumia Travel.” In reality, he was hired by Jumia as the launch MD of a small travel division called Jovago - which he left acrimoniously 5 months before it was collapsed into the Jumia brand. Clearly, he was not in fact, the “founder of Jumia Travel,” but if you did not know these contextual details, you would easily believe his claims. See the subtlety involved in dishonest storytelling?

Yeah, Kemi does not do that.

Subtlety is not Kemi’s thing. Kemi prefers her dishonesty loud and bold, instead of couched in contextual misdirection. For example, sitting boldly on the Twitter bio of her erstwhile self-promotion brand HNN Africa, sits a loud claim that - for whatever reason - nobody has ever bothered to fact check. “30 years practising as a doctor in the USA” is not intended as a joke or ironic reference of any kind - Kemi openly claims to be a US-trained medical doctor with a 30-year work history.

On her eponymous Instagram handle, she refers to herself as a “Doctor of Pharmacy,” and she uses the prefix “Dr.” unironically and unambiguously. The clear inference is that she has either an MBBS or a PharmD.

In fact on at least one occasion, she openly chided an Instagram follower for not referring to her as “Doctor.” Apparently in addition to the long list of accolades above, Kemi is supposedly a doctorate-level healthcare professional. Naturally, since arriving in Nigeria 9 years ago, she has been able to parade this assumed title around, seemingly without any questions from the Medical and Dental Council of Nigeria.

The only way to end this charade would be to get hold of documents confirming Kemi’s actual academic qualifications from source. That is exactly what I did, and the results are below. A downloadable PDF copy of the DegreeVerify document is available here.

It turns out unsurprisingly, that Kemi does not in fact possess any medical qualification other than a BSc in Pharmacy from the Philadelphia College of Pharmacy and Science. She is lying about being a medical doctor, never mind with “30 years of experience,” and she is also lying about having a PharmD. She in fact graduated with a Bachelors degree and got a job filling orders in a pharmacy. More on that later.

The second loud and unsubtle lie Kemi peddles about her alleged medical pedigree is that she was once apparently a “Member of the Board of Governors of Kingston General Hospital in Southern Ontario.” This is a claim that is regularly repeated and reinforced in the Nigerian blogosphere as content writers copy each other while chasing clicks, without the slightest attempt at a fact check.

On closer inspection, it turns out that this claim is based on her attendance at the 2010 Annual General Meeting of the Kingston General Hospital, proven by a PDF copy of the minutes of the meeting, which is conspicuously linked on her Wikipedia page.

The list in question, it turns out, is actually a list of “Members” of the Kingston General Hospital, and not a list of people on the “Governors Advisory Council”. Kingston General Hospital does not in fact, have any such thing as a “Governors Advisory Council”. What it does have is a Board of Directors, whose professional and academic profiles significantly exceed those of a Pharmacy BSc who filled orders for a living, to say the least.

What Kingston General Hospital also has, is something called the Kingston General Hospital Auxiliary, which is a membership program that anyone can join for free. This membership entitles one to, amongst other things - you guessed it - attendance at the hospital’s annual general meeting.

What this essentially means is that in 2010, Our Lady of Musiwa joined a free hospital program that allowed her to attend a meeting and have her name included on a list that specified that she was a non-voting member. She then took the absolute non-achievement of being part of a volunteer team and rebranded it as heroic and important service on a fictitious “Governors Advisory Council.” This is an example of the quintessential Kemi Olunloyo fish story - loud, brash, bold and completely divorced devoid of the slightest hint of shame.

And we’re still only just getting started.

Fish Story #2 - Kemi the “Showbiz Industry Hotshot

One of Kemi’s most ubiquitous claims is her alleged heft in the music and entertainment industry. Just take a look at the raft of claims below:

Editor and Founder of HipHossip.com (Canada's Leading Music Blog-VH1 & MTV (Canada's Leading Hip-Hop site-BET.com) Former VeeJay MTV Base (MTV Africa). Radio Nigeria on-air music radio personality Premier FM 93.5. Canadian Correspondent BET's "The Deal". Music Reporter, news anchor and Talk show host since 1996 (NBC News, WBAL-TV, V103-FM and Heaven 600AM, Baltimore USA, Premier 93.5FM Ibadan Nigeria) 2008 Presenter Live Urban Award (TIMA) Toronto Independent Music Award/2010 Presenter of Best Alternative Rock.

Member of the Canadian Association of Recording Arts and Sciences (CARAS) The JUNO AWARDS and a voting member in the 40th JUNOS.10. Member of the Hollywood Foreign Press (Golden Globe Awards)11. Member of the National Academy of TV Arts and Sciences (NATAS) The Emmy Awards.

Let’s start with HipHossip.com, which she loudly claimed to be “Canada’s Leading Music Blog” according to VH1 and MTV, and “Canada’s Leading Hip-Hop site” according to BET.com. Unsurprisingly, there is zero attribution for those supposed quotes. To anyone with a faint understanding of the industry, it is basically impossible for MTV or BET to have issued such comments about a little-known website with just 7 pages of available Google search results. The site by the way, is currently defunct.
Worse still, of the top 10 search results for this supposed market leading platform, 7 are by blogs and websites run by Kemi herself. This will become quite the recurrent theme as this story progresses, because apart from telling bold lies with the confidence of Cristiano Ronaldo taking a penalty, Kemi has also mastered the art of the artificial echo chamber. Using her dizzying array of blogsites and social media accounts, she successfully controls much of her own online narrative and reinforces the lies she has told in other places.

When writing about her, bloggers and less rigorous journalists of course, find it only too easy to copy the available information which she controls. This is how for the past 9 years, she has got away with having a Wikipedia profile claiming membership of a fictitious “Governors Advisory Council” at Ontario’s Kingston General Hospital. Again, more on that later.

NBC News, WBAL-TV, V103-FM and Heaven 600AM, Baltimore USA did not respond to my request for comment at press time, but there is absolutely zero online or public database record of Kemi Olunloyo “hosting a talk show” on any of these major regional and national US platforms. As you will discover as you go further into this story, she was in fact the subject of a police arrest that these platforms found interesting enough to do a story on. She did not at any point host a talk show on NBC News - she actually was the news. Once. For a few minutes.

That brings us to one of the most pernicious and consistent lies that Kemi tells about her professional background - her alleged past as a music industry high roller. For example, she claims to have been a presenter at the 2008 and 2010 editions of the Toronto Independent Music Awards (TIMA). To the unaware, that might sound like an achievement. Until one does some digging and finds out that this is what TIMA is

Worse still, it turns out that presenting awards at said TIMA was something one could literally volunteer for. Putting this on your CV as a supposed music industry hotshot would be like using grainy mobile phone footage from a pickup game of street football to try to convince a Premier League club to give one a contract. The same goes for being a “Member of the Canadian Association of Recording Arts and Sciences (CARAS)” which oversees The JUNO Awards and being “a voting member in the 40th JUNOS.” Being a “member” of the “prestigious” JUNO Academy in fact, is open to anyone with valid Canadian residency who can pay the princely sum of $75 plus tax. Here, have a look yourself.

As for being a “member of the Hollywood Foreign Press Association?” Simply not true. Not now, not at any time. In true Kemi style, that claim was picked completely out of thin air. Oh, and the National Academy of TV Arts and Sciences (NATAS) membership linked to The Emmy Awards? Open to anybody willing to pay $125 a year.

It is important to point out how important these deliberate mischaracterisations are to the Kemi myth. She has built a successful grift out of convincing less perceptive Nigerian internet users that she is a well-connected, person who is somehow “in the know” about happenings in Nigeria’s entertainment and political spaces. She has pictures with local and international celebrities - Drake, Rihanna and Kanye West among many - so this must mean that she has ties to these people, yes?

Source: https://twitter.com/DavidHundeyin/status/1471393279036039170?t=X0TazNoUJm5chFU0AjytUw&s=19

Lalasticlala
Seun
mynd44

I can't love David Hundeyin less. So sharp, so accurate, very humourous.

"Nairaland was what would happen if you took Reddit and forced it to have an antichrist baby with the offspring of 4Chan and an anonymous Telegram group chat. It had useful information. "



Miss Kemi really needs be in an asylum. It's too muxh abeg!!

HMMM!

Kemi should enrol in tutelage under David

Only few people know that
Kemi Olunloyo is
Musiwa Musiwa112 Becomrich




Lalasticlala

Yyy

Typical Nigerians.

So intolerant of ideas they think is right.

So Kemi has other theories (no matter how wild) what is David doing? Attack her and try to bully her into submission

Mynd44:
Typical Nigerians.

So intolerant of ideas they think is right.

So Kemi has other theories (no matter how wild) what is David doing? Attack her and try to bully her into submission

You ignored the whole body of evidence that shows clearly and shamefully that she is a fraud and prefered to talk of inanities that mean nothing?

It is people like you that allow frauds like Kemi to exist and fester. A woman whose whole life, history and claim to fame are a bare faced, shameless lie. A scam.

Such a shame! You and her

Mynd44:
Typical Nigerians.

So intolerant of ideas they think is right.

So Kemi has other theories (no matter how wild) what is David doing? Attack her and try to bully her into submission

To think this guy nah admin mtchew...

that mama like causing trouble ehn

Mynd44:
Typical Nigerians.

So intolerant of ideas they think is right.

So Kemi has other theories (no matter how wild) what is David doing? Attack her and try to bully her into submission

From obi to kemi, I Think it's time to fear Nairaland. The forum full of information. The best anyone can do is to be careful and watch whatever you type or comment. Someone is ready to dig it out no matter how long it takes.

Mynd44 let hear other people opinions on FP

Where's is musiwa? I once had a clash with him and this guy nearly mapped me to Oblivion.

hmmm..
i bin no know say hanti Kemi carry frontal like dis oh

Mstick:
Where's is musiwa? I once had a clash with him and this guy nearly mapped me to Oblivion.

Stil don't know why Lalasticlala no push to Front page

Mynd44:
Typical Nigerians.

So intolerant of ideas they think is right.

So Kemi has other theories (no matter how wild) what is David doing? Attack her and try to bully her into submission

You're being sarcastic, right?

Mstick:
Where's is musiwa? I once had a clash with him and this guy nearly mapped me to Oblivion.

See the regal pose of the great Musiwa, the lunatic legend Ask him a simple question and you'll get a map in response.

Hintona:
I can't love David Hundeyin less. So sharp, so accurate, very humourous.

"Nairaland was what would happen if you took Reddit and forced it to have an antichrist baby with the offspring of 4Chan and an anonymous Telegram group chat. It had useful information. "



Miss Kemi really needs be in an asylum. It's too muxh abeg!!

Abegi… I’m not impressed with the write up. Firstly, it is dry. Secondly, David goofed cos Kemi always claimed to be a Pharmacist and not a Medical Doctor.

Thirdly, it is coming from a wannabe investigative Journalist who misled the public with reports on how Akpabio could be involved in the murder of that girl that hit headlines sometime ago.

The guy is overhyped and he has nothing to offer.

historyles:


You ignored the whole body of evidence that shows clearly and shamefully that she is a fraud and prefered to talk of inanities that mean nothing?

It is people like you that allow frauds like Kemi to exist and fester. A woman whose whole life, history and claim to fame are a bare faced, shameless lie. A scam.

Such a shame! You and her

Kemi is not different from David who has been furnishing his gullible audience with unverified reports just to trend.

We4all:
Kemi is not different from David who has been furnishing his gullible audience with unverified reports just to trend.

Lewl.

Mynd44:
Typical Nigerians.

So intolerant of ideas they think is right.

So Kemi has other theories (no matter how wild) what is David doing? Attack her and try to bully her into submission

Dude did a thorough investigation into everything Kemi claim she is. He deserves a round of applause.

We4all:

Kemi is not different from David who has been furnishing his gullible audience with unverified reports just to trend.

If you say Kemi is not different from David then you should furnish us with evidence to back up your claim.

David brought evidence to back up his claim. Perhaps you should do the same other than give your unverified opinion.

historyles:

You ignored the whole body of evidence that shows clearly and shamefully that she is a fraud and prefered to talk of inanities that mean nothing?

It is people like you that allow frauds like Kemi to exist and fester. A woman whose whole life, history and claim to fame are a bare faced, shameless lie. A scam.

Such a shame! You and her

..

ShaqFu:
If you say Kemi is not different from David then you should furnish us with evidence to back up your claim.

David brought evidence to back up his claim. Perhaps you should do the same other than give your unverified opinion.

Please pack. Go and read most of his unverified reports and come back here to repeat your words.

Should I begin with the rumors he peddled that Akpabio could be responsible for the death of that young girl who was killed in Akwa-Ibom?

When the tables turned, he kept mute and never retracted his report.

We4all:

Please pack. Go and read most of his unverified reports and come back here to repeat your words.

Should I begin with the rumors he peddled that Akpabio could be responsible for the death of that young girl who was killed in Akwa-Ibom?

When the tables turned, he kept mute and never retracted his report.

You should take a few steps back and give yourself a brain. What's my business with his unverified report? I'm talking about what he posted about Kemi. He backed it with proof and you're here telling me to go and read some of his unverified report.

Why don't you post some of those unverified report yourself. He said Akpabio could... I'm sure you don't know the meaning of that word.

ShaqFu:
You should take a few steps back and give yourself a brain. What's my business with his unverified report? I'm talking about what he posted about Kemi. He backed it with proof and you're here telling me to go and read some of his unverified report.

Why don't you post some of those unverified report yourself. He said Akpabio could... I'm sure you don't know the meaning of that word.

And I thought I was trying to enlighten a sane person. Coconut heads everywhere I go.

We4all:

And I thought I was trying to enlighten a sane person. Coconut heads everywhere I go.

My friend will you shut tha hell up and go take a hike. Who asked you to enlighten anybody.

Whenever people like you are shown the error of your ways, then you start engaging in cheap whataboutism and what not. You who don't even know what could mean want to enlighten who exactly?

May a thousand bee sting that useless thing you call a head.

ShaqFu:
My friend will you shut tha hell up and go take a hike. Who asked you to enlighten anybody.

Whenever people like you are shown that error of your ways, then you start engaging in cheap whataboutism and what not. You who don't even know what could mean want to enlighten who exactly?

May a thousand bee sting that useless thing you call a head.

Damn! You’re dumber than I thought. Read again why ‘could’ was used in the post and stop fooling yourself on a public forum.

We4all:

Damn! You’re dumber than I thought. Read again why ‘could’ was used in the post and stop fooling yourself on a public forum.

Of course this will be your response. The response befitting a human piece of trash with nothing good going on in their life.

You're just a low budget bastard with the IQ of a weasel that hasn't eaten anything good for days, that's why you're here plaguing us with your stupidity.

I'm sure you don't even know the meaning of could, would, should that's why you throw words around like a whore_ that hasn't seen a customer all day. Anuofia.

ShaqFu:
Of course this will be your response. The response befitting a human piece of trash with nothing good going on in their life.

You're just a low budget bastard with the IQ of a weasel that hasn't eaten anything good for days, that's why you're here plaguing us with your stupidity.

I'm sure you don't even know the meaning of could, would, should that's why you throw words around like a whore_ that hasn't seen a customer all day. Anuofia.

Your grammar can cause a child to develop leprosy. Mbeke feeling like a diction master. A dumb ass that can’t even make use of his punctuations properly trying to educate me on how to use ‘could’. Wonders shall never end!

We4all:

Your grammar can cause a child to develop leprosy. Mbeke feeling like a diction master. A dumb ass that can’t even make use of his punctuations properly trying to educate me on how to use ‘could’. Wonders shall never end!

And your foolishness can make a child go into anaphylactic shock.

I'm very sure you don't know 'mgbeke' is usually used to refer to a woman and I'm not a woman. See why I said you throw words around like a used piece of tissue paper used to wipe someone's ass.

Indeed, wonders shall never end when online douchebags like yourself won't stop bedeviling social media with your gargantuan stupidity.

You deserve a day in Hell for being a pent up low down dirty bastard. This is you who don't even know what could mean and it's uses telling me I'm what exactly? You're an impoverished imp.

ShaqFu:
And your foolishness can make a child go into anaphylactic shock.

I'm very sure you don't know 'mgbeke' is usually used to refer to a woman and I'm not a woman. See why I said you throw words around like a used piece of tissue paper used to wipe someone's ass.

Indeed, wonders shall never end when online douchebags like yourself won't stop bedeviling social media with your gargantuan stupidity.

You deserve a day in Hell for being a pent up low down dirty bastard. This is you who don't even know what could mean and it's uses telling me I'm what exactly? You're an impoverished imp.

Retard, Mbeke isn’t an English word and I can use it however I wish. Trying to use a grandiloquent style to throw shades like a deranged being makes you sound stupid.

I am positive you don’t even know the meaning of the words you use cos they sound like words straight outta a movie.

Hintona:
I can't love David Hundeyin less. So sharp, so accurate, very humourous.

"Nairaland was what would happen if you took Reddit and forced it to have an antichrist baby with the offspring of 4Chan and an anonymous Telegram group chat. It had useful information. "



Miss Kemi really needs be in an asylum. It's too muxh abeg!!

oba Solomon should marry Kemi as 1st wife, esabod as 2nd wife and Tonto dike as third wife albeit they'll live in different locations