| Re: What My Fiancée Told Me. by Munzy14(m): 10:25pm On Jan 06, 2022 |
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| Re: What My Fiancée Told Me. by mastermaestro(m): 12:04am On Jan 07, 2022 |
hearttoheart001:
. Like me being, the boss, authoritative, controlling, and domineering right? You still don’t get it, do you?! The word is ‘lead’!  |
| Re: What My Fiancée Told Me. by efficiencie(m): 12:26am On Jan 07, 2022 |
hearttoheart001:
I and my lady has a very beautiful relationship that will lead to marriage not too distance time. I like having an open conversation with my lady. She is free to clear the air with me in all things. I see her as a friend, companion, team player, queen, and lover.
In one of our conversations, my girl told me I tick all her boxes like 80% but I should work on my financial life. I also believe in a traditional way of marriage where a man provides and protects his home. Granted I have made some not too good choices and I throw money away. This affects my pocket which my girl step in at some point. Due to covid 19, all senior non-essential staff was let off. I am without a job at the moment, while looking for a job or travelling to an outside country, I decided to position myself to earn big by learning a skill apart from a school degree. I am neck-deep into the skill and I know something good will come out of it.
My girl does have this feeling that I won't be able to provide for her, even though I am a good person according to her. I keep pushing it to assure her that she will be happy with me. Both of us have made a lot of sacrifices, I don't intend to leave the relationship.
What leads me to create this thread. I was having a conversation with her, she told me I am not "Assertive enough". I was a bit shocked. I intend to build a home where my wife is an equal partner but I am the head, my wife co-decision maker, my wife as a friend not subordinate, I am to be loved by my woman not feared. I understand Assertive to be:1 Confident 2. Forceful 3. self. confident 4. Positive 5. bold 6. Decisive
7. Assured 8. commanding 9. Authoritative 10. Dominant 11. Pushy 12. Pushful. 13. Domineering. 14. Determined.
To the best of my knowledge, I know I am decisive (though I seek her opinion on any issue to carry her along), I have built enough self-confidence but I respect people's boundaries and choices. I may be a very private person but I am bold, daring, and positive.
I never want to be pushy, authoritative, domineering, and forceful in my relationship or marriage. I want her to love me not to fear me. So I am surprised by her word. I will like to know what she means and how to make a necessary change. I notice some lapses in our relationship but I choose to allow it to slide because I want us to enjoy the serenity surrounding our relationship.
I have asked her if she wants me to be a NIGERIA KIND OF MAN not An Ideal kind of man in the relationship, she gladly says yes. So if I am an Authoritative man, pushy kind of man, domineering man, controlling and commanding man, will it help my relationship? Is there something she is telling me or I need to know? Please I need all the advice from people who are in a relationship or marriage. I am completely disturbed. I need that bashing and advice. Thanks
Everyone who has worked with me does say I am bossy, I am principled, I am a perfectionist. I never wanted my lady to feel that way. I accept most of her flaws, I only wanted to make a friend out of her.
I intend to show her this thread so we can both learn from it. Dude drop this equality BS. There are times it will be infeasible, unwise or even dangerous to seek your wife's view on every matter before acting. You are the man. You must know how to stand your ground and be assertive even when your wife disagrees before you plunge your generation into suffering just because you want to simp around like Adam. 3 Likes 1 Share |
| Re: What My Fiancée Told Me. by mystery22: 3:18pm On Jan 07, 2022 |
hearttoheart001:
. Like me being, the boss, authoritative, controlling, and domineering right? yes,I had a girl like dat. |
| Re: What My Fiancée Told Me. by frozen70(f): 4:27pm On Jan 08, 2022 |
hearttoheart001:
I and my lady has a very beautiful relationship that will lead to marriage not too distance time. I like having an open conversation with my lady. She is free to clear the air with me in all things. I see her as a friend, companion, team player, queen, and lover.
In one of our conversations, my girl told me I tick all her boxes like 80% but I should work on my financial life. I also believe in a traditional way of marriage where a man provides and protects his home. Granted I have made some not too good choices and I throw money away. This affects my pocket which my girl step in at some point. Due to covid 19, all senior non-essential staff was let off. I am without a job at the moment, while looking for a job or travelling to an outside country, I decided to position myself to earn big by learning a skill apart from a school degree. I am neck-deep into the skill and I know something good will come out of it.
My girl does have this feeling that I won't be able to provide for her, even though I am a good person according to her. I keep pushing it to assure her that she will be happy with me. Both of us have made a lot of sacrifices, I don't intend to leave the relationship.
What leads me to create this thread. I was having a conversation with her, she told me I am not "Assertive enough". I was a bit shocked. I intend to build a home where my wife is an equal partner but I am the head, my wife co-decision maker, my wife as a friend not subordinate, I am to be loved by my woman not feared. I understand Assertive to be:1 Confident 2. Forceful 3. self. confident 4. Positive 5. bold 6. Decisive
7. Assured 8. commanding 9. Authoritative 10. Dominant 11. Pushy 12. Pushful. 13. Domineering. 14. Determined.
To the best of my knowledge, I know I am decisive (though I seek her opinion on any issue to carry her along), I have built enough self-confidence but I respect people's boundaries and choices. I may be a very private person but I am bold, daring, and positive.
I never want to be pushy, authoritative, domineering, and forceful in my relationship or marriage. I want her to love me not to fear me. So I am surprised by her word. I will like to know what she means and how to make a necessary change. I notice some lapses in our relationship but I choose to allow it to slide because I want us to enjoy the serenity surrounding our relationship.
I have asked her if she wants me to be a NIGERIA KIND OF MAN not An Ideal kind of man in the relationship, she gladly says yes. So if I am an Authoritative man, pushy kind of man, domineering man, controlling and commanding man, will it help my relationship? Is there something she is telling me or I need to know? Please I need all the advice from people who are in a relationship or marriage. I am completely disturbed. I need that bashing and advice. Thanks
Everyone who has worked with me does say I am bossy, I am principled, I am a perfectionist. I never wanted my lady to feel that way. I accept most of her flaws, I only wanted to make a friend out of her.
I intend to show her this thread so we can both learn from it. From your write up, I don't even understand what she meant by you should work on your finances Is she expecting too much from you Are you or have you been spending carelessly Well, any woman who is working hard to make a living should appreciate a man who still play hi roles up to 70% She needs to explain more about what she wants you to do Lastly, you are not in this world to please any woman but to do your job as a man and a future father |
| Re: What My Fiancée Told Me. by MOS6502: 5:02pm On Jan 08, 2022 |
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