We Expire As Women & Other Nonsense Society Keeps Telling Us - Family - Nairaland
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| We Expire As Women & Other Nonsense Society Keeps Telling Us by Brightgem(f): 2:42pm On Mar 06, 2022 |
I hope this speaks to the heart and stimulates good judgment in someone today. Welcome to my small corner of musings. This is an old post some might have seen in 2020, but I decided to bring it back as we are marking International Women's Day this month. So do have a good read or re-read. Last November we had the 30 days of content for men. See other posts that was shared this week on The Moral Code platform. We expire as women and many other sick notions society uses to define us which sadly has led many to the famous express the masquerade was warned not to enter, so that it doesn’t get hit. Hopefully ladies, after reading this you don’t become that masquerade. Hopefully, men after reading this, you can change how you raise your daughters, or your future daughters. So society says your biological clock is ticking. If you’ve been saying this to yourself, stop now! If you’ve been saying this to others! STOP NOW! let me tell you how a woman who believes this behaves. She runs after everything that looks like love or potential. She acts desperate to become Mrs. somebody and doesn’t mind the hooligan she might end up with to keep up with this, because in her head she can change him and besides her biological clock is ticking. She fears the number 30 hitting her as her age because that’s the number of decline of her life as society says. If she’s married, because her biological clock is ticking, she fails to settle into life and be calm, to enjoy marital bliss, even the pressure that doesn’t exist, she creates one for herself. She’s still running here and there drinking all manner of concoction to have a child. I am not berating the pain of childlessness, but I wish people can learn that sometimes a child may not come through you but one can grow through you, and that’s just as beautiful. Because as long as it’s no fault of yours, you should not feel ashamed that for now you aren’t able to birth a child. In one of my videos where I talked about the rising rape culture in Nigeria, I mentioned an experience at a meet up event addressing the same rape issues and one of the stories shared was that of a woman who encouraged her husband to rape her neighbors baby because some vodoo man told her that was the way she could have a child. They did it and I can’t recall if that baby survived or not, how evil and desperate can you be, to destroy a child in order to have your own? When you desperately want something, this is how your mind will tilt towards evil till you turn the thought into action. Society tells you if you hit 30 you have started to expire, that you are damaged goods, you are less desirable. I tell you today that if 30 is nearing for you dear good woman, embrace it, long for it, usher it in with celebration and joy in your heart. 3 decades on earth is beautiful, you are not who you were in your 20s you know a lot more, you are as beautiful as you treat and make yourself feel. It’s about you, not the world. You are as beautiful as you feel inside. You are made to feel that you you must dull your shine, downplay or hide your achievements. You can’t buy that land, that house, that car because you will intimidate some people. Please don’t wait for certain things to happen before you live your best life, don’t postpone your fulfillment and joy, the right people in your life will never be intimidated by your shine, the ones that are and want you to dim your light to make them more comfortable should be kicked out the door. As long as you have worked honestly to earn all you have, you are on the right track and should remain there. You are made to feel you only have a place in either your father’s house or your husband’s. Please don’t be that person, you are made to feel that you only have a spot in one of those two places, but I tell you, you can create your own haven. It’s painful to see women kicked out of husbands’ houses and fathers’ houses too reject them. Sometimes the two homes meant to be your place of refuge, becomes your place of torture. This is why all your life, while women are known to live for others, to sacrifice for others which is a natural trait of the woman, while all this is true and noble, you must learn to have your own life, a little something that belongs to you and you alone, so that when the world wants to tear you apart and you have no support from those meant to protect you, you run back to your little thing. Decide what that thing will be, and never lack those human beings that come rain or shine you are certain will always have your back. Have a solid support system. Dear men, please do not raise your daughters to believe once they leave your home, they have no safety net with you anymore, you are the original protectors of your daughters. It is not your business what people will say, when people go to bed at night they are thinking about their own lives. It is your duty to protect and preserve the dignity of your daughter. Society sometimes speak to us like we are objects or properties. No, women are complete human beings. Marriage is not a ticket to heaven. Your worth and value before God is not by your married title, every human being has a unique purpose, some listen to their inner voices and find it, some spend all their lives listening to others around them and never find it, they define themselves based on everything from outside, but never anything from inside. This is why it’s important to be alone for a while to be okay with being alone, great people, even the prophets of God found themselves in solitude. They heard and understood their purpose in solitude. Have you found yourself? Do you know where you want to be and how you want to get there? Have you been asking yourself questions and answering them? If you desire to get married are you clear about the kind of partner you want? Have you asked yourself the behaviors you could never tolerate? Have you agreed with yourself what you may be able to tolerate? If you are married and raising kids, are you parenting deliberately, or leaving everything on autopilot? Do you have a plan for if life takes you on routes completely new to you. We’ve been emotionally blackmailed into believing a lot of things, things that have become ingrained in our subconscious. Sometimes we are even told it’s God that has instructed these twisted notions, a weapon used by those who want to control us, make us beneath them and more. Believe me when I say, if something doesn’t feel right and they tell you it’s from God, don’t just swallow it, check it well, because God doesn’t intend a hard life for us, yes there’ll be hardships but He has also promised that after pain will come ease. I wish we all come to understand, men inclusive, that we are only defined by what we choose as definition for ourselves, not what others say. I wish we can all learn, that pressure from outside can barely get us, when we maintain our calm on the inside. If you believe you expire, you will behave like an expired person. Ugly, tired, desperate, fake, manipulative. But if you are calm and full of yourself on the inside, full of positive thoughts, you will easily see through those who just want to make you lesser. Who think that you too must conform to everything society says. Who are you not to conform. There’s more to this existence called life than they make us believe. Find You today! And start to rise like a true bright star. I want to say so much more but since it’s getting difficult to craft it into words. I’ll stop here. Thanks for reading. SOURCE - www.themoralcodeng.com 6 Likes 1 Share
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| Re: We Expire As Women & Other Nonsense Society Keeps Telling Us by Nobody: 2:53pm On Mar 06, 2022 |
Good one but I have problems with the last picture talking about women jumping on a man's bed on the first day,its not possible |
| Re: We Expire As Women & Other Nonsense Society Keeps Telling Us by Baitullah: 3:08pm On Mar 06, 2022 |
Several points to be noted here. However, there are factors that contribute to why a woman is considered to be expired, clocking 30 ain't part of them. |
| Re: We Expire As Women & Other Nonsense Society Keeps Telling Us by advanceDNA: 3:29pm On Mar 06, 2022 |
At some point we all lose the biological ability bear children..both men and women...in fact we all lose the ability to do everything at some point .....humans expire...it’s nature’s design.. how you respond to this fact is totally up to you.... both men and women expire...knowing this helps us to make hay while the sun is still shining....some people don’t just like hearing it 2 Likes |
| Re: We Expire As Women & Other Nonsense Society Keeps Telling Us by Nobody: 3:29pm On Mar 06, 2022 |
No one is saying a woman of 30plus years can't achieve great things... A woman of that age can buy a car or a house or can treat herself to a tour round the globe if she wants to and if she's willing to work for it... Achievements are not limited by age.... However, when you hear people say "a woman expires at 30", they're not implying that women can't achieve those great things, what that means is that her options in the dating market reduces as she ages... On average, the number of men who will pursue a girl of 23 is far more than the number of men who will pursue a woman of 30... A girl of 23 on average, looks far more attractive to the eyes than a woman of 30, thus more men will flock in her direction.... In other words, a woman's SMV (Sexual Market Value) depreciates with age  ...Her value as a human as perceived by the world is dependent on what she has been able to achieve and is achieving in her life time and that isn't limited or dependent on her age, but her ability to attract quality men (relationship wise) depreciates with age.... 2 Likes 3 Shares |
| Re: We Expire As Women & Other Nonsense Society Keeps Telling Us by ejighikemeuwa: 4:02pm On Mar 06, 2022 |
You are a teacher by instinct, go forward |
| Re: We Expire As Women & Other Nonsense Society Keeps Telling Us by ImaIma1(f): 5:22pm On Mar 06, 2022 |
Favfables1: Who are the people who say these things? Men! Men like you. It's men who are always trying to break and dominate women with such unfounded views about their biological makeup. These views by men are meant to make women desperate and feel inferior thinking that they have to make hay while the sun shines. So she gives in to any fool that makes he feel that time is not on her side. Women are smarter now. Now, while you might be more attracted to a 16 year old girl, another guy like you is attracted to a 40 year old woman. Everyone has a choice, even that woman that seems expired in your eyes has a choice. And you should know that men also become less desirable as they age. There's a difference between the fresh thick body of a 25 year old man and that of a 38 year old. The biological clock is not affects men too. However, many men feel this urge to "cut women's wings" by making her feel.less of herself. Women should be wise enough to see through such men and put them in their places. 8 Likes 3 Shares |
| Re: We Expire As Women & Other Nonsense Society Keeps Telling Us by talk2hb1(m): 6:31pm On Mar 06, 2022 |
Tooh, Another Lie To Womanhood. Woman Another Woman First Enemy! 1 Like |
| Re: We Expire As Women & Other Nonsense Society Keeps Telling Us by Nobody: 8:17pm On Mar 06, 2022 |
ImaIma1: Kikikikikikikikiki   I was laughing the entire time I read your write up... 1. "Men like me"? Really? Gosh! I hate to break it to you ma'am, but no man is like me ... I'm a spec 2. No one is trying to "break" anybody ma'am... And besides, those views are not unfounded, unless you're being sentimental about it... An average 23year old will attract more men, anytime, anyday as compared to an average 30year old woman, and that my friend, is a fact....deal with it! 3. If an adult woman wants to feel inferior and desperate over some societal views, then that's her fault and nobody else's .... If for instance I feel that you can't make money unless you sleep with a man, should that make you desperate to sleep with any man you see? And even if you want to sleep with a man, why should I take the blame for that act?Face it... Women of 18 and above are adults and ALL ADULTS should take responsibility for their beliefs and their actions... Stop putting blames on men for a woman's beliefs and actions, that's just irresponsible and pathetic! 4. Where in my write up did I say a 40year old woman doesn't have a choice? Where in my write up did I say no man approaches a 40year? Uhhnn? ...I said this before and I'll say it again, "A 23year old lady will be approached by more men than a 40year old anytime, anyday" .... It doesn't mean men won't approach 40year olds, it means as compared to younger adult females, women of those age are severely lacking (contextually speaking).... 5. Hahahaha!! You must be kidding me... Since when are women attracted to a man's age? An average woman is attracted to the depth of a man's Pocket and as men get older, their capacity to earn increases (mostly)... If men are so undesirable as they age, why will a girl of 18, agree to date a 50year old man who has money? Is it because there are no "desirable" 25year old? 6. Don't women too try to "clip a man's wing and put them in their place" when they broke shame men? Don't you think that, that makes men feel less of themselves?? Sweetheart.... Just do and believe whatever makes you sleep well at night ...6 Likes 1 Share |
| Re: We Expire As Women & Other Nonsense Society Keeps Telling Us by kazyhm(m): 8:35pm On Mar 06, 2022 |
ImaIma1: There are so many truths that you can do nothing about.....this is one of them. Both genders have opinions and options for certain things........ The issue mainly is women want to dictate what men should and shouldn't believe..........while they tend to fault what men want woman to believe about men........ 6 Likes 2 Shares |
| Re: We Expire As Women & Other Nonsense Society Keeps Telling Us by Karleb(m): 8:48pm On Mar 06, 2022 |
kazyhm: That is why these kinds of women shouldn't be taken seriously. Let them shout on Twitter, on TV and newspapers but in reality, reality will check. When a woman wants a type of man, nothing is wrong because it's her choice but when a man wants a type of woman, they come up with posts like these. 7 Likes 1 Share |
| Re: We Expire As Women & Other Nonsense Society Keeps Telling Us by kazyhm(m): 8:55pm On Mar 06, 2022 |
Karleb: To what end will women fake reality ? 1 Like |
| Re: We Expire As Women & Other Nonsense Society Keeps Telling Us by Karleb(m): 9:04pm On Mar 06, 2022 |
kazyhm: I don't know but women love playing the victim to have their ways. It's just the selfish side of some of them especially the woke ones. They want to reap even when they didn't sow. They want the glory without any work and they want it forever. Mind you, all women are not like this. Some women know their place. 2 Likes 1 Share |
| Re: We Expire As Women & Other Nonsense Society Keeps Telling Us by Nobody: 10:28pm On Mar 06, 2022 |
Karleb: My dear... This their wahala too much.... A lady will go online and say "I can't marry a guy who doesn't earn 6figures, is tall and have 6packs", "I can't marry a guy who doesn't have big gbola" and nobody says anything, because, it's their choice!! But when a man says what he wants, it becomes a huge problem and they start throwing insults upandan, can you imagine, one girl in a different thread referred to men as irresponsible and stingy all because men said they don't want to marry a single mother ....7 Likes 4 Shares |
| Re: We Expire As Women & Other Nonsense Society Keeps Telling Us by ImaIma1(f): 12:26am On Mar 07, 2022 |
Favfables1: 1. Sorry to burst your bubble, but you sound like every prejudiced man on this forum. Nothing unique aboutyou. 2. A 23 year old could attract 100 men daily. 70 of them might be useless. The number might matter to you but a 30 could get a better man out of the "two " she attracts. Deal with that fact mister! 3. Some societal views? Believe it or not, society has a way of branding women unjustly. And not all women can see themselves differently. 4. Oh! I thought men remain young forever and live forever while women age and get less desirable. 5. Based on your statistics and judgement from you and your kind? What spec are you again, Mr Spec? 6. What can I say? They learnt from the best. You guys have mastered the art of shaming and passed it on. You even do it with fictitious statistics. Have a good night honey. Don't let "age-shaming" women keep you up at night. 10 Likes 1 Share |
| Re: We Expire As Women & Other Nonsense Society Keeps Telling Us by ImaIma1(f): 12:29am On Mar 07, 2022 |
kazyhm: What truths are you referring to? Who is dictating what you should believe? 5 Likes 1 Share |
| Re: We Expire As Women & Other Nonsense Society Keeps Telling Us by Nobody: 1:00am On Mar 07, 2022 |
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| Re: We Expire As Women & Other Nonsense Society Keeps Telling Us by cococandy(f): 1:13am On Mar 07, 2022 |
I’m only going to address the “looks” part of your post Many women glow up in their 30s. They in fact look their best. Hips fill out. Skin issues reduce or disappear. Confidence is high. The diminished attraction thing is made up. Men will approach 30+ women because they find them attractive but the moment the woman says she’s 30+, then she’s suddenly unattractive. If the same woman were to lie that she’s 24, then automatically she’s attractive again. It’s all mind games that y’all are playing…on yourselves for that matter. Because at the end of the day, some people miss out on what could have been a great relationship because they are fixated on numbers that doesn’t really affect them in the grand scheme of things. Men and women look their best in their thirties, experts say Favfables1: 6 Likes 2 Shares
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| Re: We Expire As Women & Other Nonsense Society Keeps Telling Us by Nobody: 7:19am On Mar 07, 2022 |
ImaIma1: 1. Well... Your beliefs about me is IRRELEVANT ...2. So now it's about the "kind" of men, no more about the number 3. So if women can't see themselves differently, whose fault is it, men?? 4. Where in my write up did I say this, biko ...5. one of a kinda spec 6. Wowwwww.... So men are the cause of the low self-esteem issues faced by some women ...I slept well o my dear I hope you did too? Have a nice day at work... ((Thumbs up)) 2 Likes |
| Re: We Expire As Women & Other Nonsense Society Keeps Telling Us by ImaIma1(f): 7:51am On Mar 07, 2022 |
Favfables1: Good to know. Enjoy your day. 1 Like |
| Re: We Expire As Women & Other Nonsense Society Keeps Telling Us by kazyhm(m): 9:27am On Mar 07, 2022 |
ImaIma1: Men age like wine Women age like milk 1 Like |
| Re: We Expire As Women & Other Nonsense Society Keeps Telling Us by ImaIma1(f): 10:15am On Mar 07, 2022 |
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| Re: We Expire As Women & Other Nonsense Society Keeps Telling Us by GloriousGbola: 6:15pm On Mar 08, 2022 |
cococandy: No need for this long story. The term MILF exists for a reason. |
| Re: We Expire As Women & Other Nonsense Society Keeps Telling Us by PrimadonnaO(f): 10:22pm On Mar 08, 2022 |
To be honest, arguments like this are usually fraught with sentiments. It is true that age isn't the friendliest to women... It is wise to know this for a fact and make hay while the sun shines. Making hay could mean different things to different women. We all do not have the same priorities. Defining what is most important to you will inform how you use your time. ****************************** Rather than try to live in denial of facts, the important message should be helping women understand what self-worth means. Helping them define their purpose in life early enough. These two things (self-worth and an understanding of purpose) underlie everything that makes a woman's life much more meaningful. 7 Likes 3 Shares |
| Re: We Expire As Women & Other Nonsense Society Keeps Telling Us by crackhaus: 10:40pm On Mar 08, 2022 |
PrimadonnaO:This is why you remain one of the few realistic females around these parts. 1 Like |
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