₦airaland Forum

Thank you all for the advice.

He could be using it as some sort of defense mechanism against your repeated emotional abuse?

Imagine how it hurts you when he brings it up no imagine how it would have hurt him too when you said them...

It's could also mean he's a petty insecure dude...

Ur husband na transgendered...he needs flogging!

you can't really do anything about this...you just have to talk to him about all your concerns... especially him putting you down or talking ill of you to his family and friends...that's not really right...he should tell you areas you are not doing well,teach you and support you to get better in those areas.....so it is all on you to have a deep/serious conversation with your husband...good luck

Thank you

Thank you

Learn to control your tongue when you're angry

Some women can say unprintable things out of anger, some out of little or regard for their spouse.

Always try to avoid issue even when you have a point, if you like sell your body and precious belongings to provide for the family and you have no respect for him... It means nothing!

Respect means love to a man

Younglady06:
Whenever I have issues with my husband, we settle and move on but later in future when we have an argument again he brings up the things I said back then to the picture I really do not know why he does this but most times I’m hurt and I feel this’s something I have begged him for forgiveness for and he tells me I have forgiven you..
Most times I do not even remember I said stuff because I feel we have moved on..
Note, anytime he says things that hurt or break me I do not even bring it up when we have any argument but he does this to me effortlessly.
What do I do? Thank you
*He also tells his mother all sort when we have an argument and this’s something I will never do to him.. I will never speak bad of him to my parent or my siblings when we have issues but anytime we have issues he finds it very easy to call his mother and his brother to tell them all sort..
He involves his friends also when we have issues but any time we have issues I do not tell my parent or even my siblings or even friends

While your hubby should not be reporting you to his mum and should try not to bring up old stuff, you also should watch your tongue when u are angry. You say his bringing things up again hurts you, well your saying those things in the first place, probably hurt him too.

Make Una find balance and compromise

Must You people Be Happening Issues Your too old to be Young.

Younglady06:
I brought this here because I have no one to talk to or advise me..
I have similar issue with you but mine is a little bit different.

Whenever my husband and I have an argument he calls his mom on phone so she can hear whatever it’s we are arguing about.. he reports me most times to his mom when we have an argument instead of him to face me.. I don’t know why he does this but I have a feeling he want them to see me as a bad person.. There’s no time we have an argument that he will not call his mom to tell her or sort of things.. This’s something I will never do to him. I will never even call my parent or siblings to tell them anything if we had an argument because I feel I will be staining him in front of my people but he finds it very easy to call his mom and brother to report me to them

Your husband is childish is what and you need to both side down as a couple and talk about this issue which is obviously causing you real grief.

What your husband does there amounts to mental abuse and no one should sit silently in relationship to receive that sort of anguish even on a regular basis.

If you are unable to get him to reason with you on this habit of his, then do not hesitate to engage the help of a professional marriage counselor to work you both through adopting better conflict resolution tactics to help your husband learn better and more mature ways to handle conflicts.