Pick your furniture like you pick a wife: It should make you feel comfortable and look nice, but not so nice that if someone walks past it they want to steal it.

Do people your age know how to comb their hair? It looks like two squirrels crawled on their heads and started fucking.

The worst thing you can be is a liar, Okay, fine, yes, the worst thing you can be is a Nazi, but then number two is liar. Nazi one, liar two.

Never Assume That Which You Do Not Know

A Man’s House Is His House

It’s Important to Behave Oneself

Do Not Be a Goddamned Liar

It’s Important to Know the Value of a Dollar

Not Everyone’s Balls Should Be Busted Try Your Best, and When That’s Not Good Enough, Figure Something Out Quick

At the End of the Day, You Have to Make the Best Decision for Yourself

Confidence Is the Way to a Woman’s Heart, or at Least into Her Pants

Always Put Your Best Foot Forward

You Have to Believe You’re Worth a Damn

Focus on Living, Dying Is the Easy Part

Don’t Be So Quick to Buy into What Authority Prescribes

You Never Stop Worrying About Your Children

At the End of the Day, at Least You Have Family

Sometimes It’s Nice When People You Love Need

You You Have to Listen, and don't ignore what you hear

I said SHIRTS NOT POO, which kind software be this!

chumakk:

I said SHIRTS NOT POO, which kind software be this!

whether s. h.it or poo, Your Joke OVER-DRY **yawns***

Mtchew

mtcheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeew ,datz sme dry ish

I prefer dry JOKES to dry comment See their face

poster u'r so dry u make d sahara desert jealous,we came 2 read jokes not what ur father says

chumakk:

I prefer dry JOKES to dry comment See their face

lol