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Please I Really Need An Advice Urgently..experience Minds - Family - Nairaland

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As I'm Enduring This, Am I Really Making My Children Better? / How Do I Get My Wife And Kid Back? I Really Love Her So Much / My Husband Is Being Insensitive, I Need An Advice (2) (3) (4)

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Please I Really Need An Advice Urgently..experience Minds by Sylove: 10:14am On Aug 04, 2022
I started this relationship with my partner about four years ago even though I was warned by my mum not to,i refused cos she had a secret agenda and was divorced too.
This man was managing a business with his friend in the same shop and they were both going along well. Suddenly I came into the picture and jealousy started the friend now realised he had to get married first.
Then I was working at shop rite with my OND and my partner is a Bsc holder. He was serious about the relationship, I met the family and they were such nice people only that they are not wealthy. I felt even if he is not wealthy as far as I am working and he is too at least no p.
To cut the long story short belle enter,my mum took me to his house to go and stay with him saying it was more honourable until he is ready, he accepted and we started living togeda,he nice though, doesn't cheat but most be forced to achieve his goals, that's when I realized he was a hard core gambler who has lost millions in gambling(visual),he broke up with his friend some months after and now dependant on me.
Even though my salary was poor,i still managed to fend for both of us. Even until birth all was on me. I was patient because I knew that things will change one day. Months passed I took in again this time my job was no longer dere I took to the streets and kept on doing menial jobs like sweeping, cleaning till I gave birth even the one he accused me of cheating on him even when I was suffering washing people's mess all this while the both jobs he got he was fired for money wahala
I have begged him to stop this gambling of a thing and it keeps falling on deaf ears. I got a bank job and we were managing but now I can't take it any longer how can I have a man of 40 and still be taking care of him, school fees for kids,feeding and all,i having been the one searching for job every minute online for him but he would Neva do that, go around town and search for job. No.
OK he suddenly came up with an idea that he wants to learn work, on whose account? I mean are men this wicked even telling me that if I think I have had enough I can take my leave and leave his kids behind this was because I told him he didn't want to work and should look for one.
I am writing this because I am sick and tired of this, his mum, Bro and Sis are all complaining of him. Yes he played a part of taking care of the kids at home for a while but I will still come back to do homework and all the house chores and still do the nyt job.
I didnt want this kids to face what I faced when I was young but seems I have a make a decision real quick b4 this man ruins my life.
Jobless and owing debt everywhere and still wouldn't teach his kids. Please what should I do I know I have done a great mistake but at least a lady of 27yrs still have hope.
Please help
Re: Please I Really Need An Advice Urgently..experience Minds by xcclectures: 10:20am On Aug 04, 2022
Sylove:
I started this relationship with my partner about four years ago even though I was warned by my mum not to,i refused cos she had a secret agenda and was divorced too.
This man was managing a business with his friend in the same shop and they were both going along well. Suddenly I came into the picture and jealousy started the friend now realised he had to get married first.
Then I was working at shop rite with my OND and my partner is a Bsc holder. He was serious about the relationship, I met the family and they were such nice people only that they are not wealthy. I felt even if he is not wealthy as far as I am working and he is too at least no p.
To cut the long story short belle enter,my mum took me to his house to go and stay with him saying it was more honourable until he is ready, he accepted and we started living togeda,he nice though, doesn't cheat but most be forced to achieve his goals, that's when I realized he was a hard core gambler who has lost millions in gambling(visual),he broke up with his friend some months after and now dependant on me.
Even though my salary was poor,i still managed to fend for both of us. Even until birth all was on me. I was patient because I knew that things will change one day. Months passed I took in again this time my job was no longer dere I took to the streets and kept on doing menial jobs like sweeping, cleaning till I gave birth even the one he accused me of cheating on him even when I was suffering washing people's mess all this while the both jobs he got he was fired for money wahala
I have begged him to stop this gambling of a thing and it keeps falling on deaf ears. I got a bank job and we were managing but now I can't take it any longer how can I have a man of 40 and still be taking care of him, school fees for kids,feeding and all,i having been the one searching for job every minute online for him but he would Neva do that, go around town and search for job. No.
OK he suddenly came up with an idea that he wants to learn work, on whose account? I mean are men this wicked even telling me that if I think I have had enough I can take my leave and leave his kids behind this was because I told him he didn't want to work and should look for one.
I am writing this because I am sick and tired of this, his mum, Bro and Sis are all complaining of him. Yes he played a part of taking care of the kids at home for a while but I will still come back to do homework and all the house chores and still do the nyt job.
I didnt want this kids to face what I faced when I was young but seems I have a make a decision real quick b4 this man ruins my life.
Jobless and owing debt everywhere and still wouldn't teach his kids. Please what should I do I know I have done a great mistake but at least a lady of 27yrs still have hope.
Please help






Na still money problem.

Let's tackle it financially. I run a digital agency and both you can work with me and earn 75,000 Naira monthly. Leave theocracies and face practical, both of you havigne xtre 150k will chage and completely tranform your current realities..


When the student is ready, the teacher will appear. I am here...Read the brief below and contact me.


Work remotely and earn between 75,000 and 150,000 Naira


We are recruiting creative content writers to join our team of creatives.


All you need to do is write articles daily from home using either a PC, Smart phone or Tab.


Training will be provided so both new and seasoned writers are encouraged to apply.

Writers on the team are required to write between 2,000 and 4,000 words daily and the moment the number of words written attains 41,000 words milestone, payment of 50,000 Naira is made to you. And the next " 41,000 Words cycle " begins the next project.


No hidden biases. We are currently recruiting just 10 new writers to join our team, so hurry and take advantage of this window of opportunity.


Note payment is done strictly when the total word count hits 41,000 words. If you achieve this in two weeks you will be paid then, if achieved in three weeks, you will be paid then


You will be required to write varieties of articles ranging from News articles. Business Articles. Tech Articles ..Cryptocurrency articles.. Health Articles. Sports Articles. Ebooks, Press release statements ...



Send in your application. My WhatsApp contact - Zero Seven Zero Five Four Zero One Fourteen Fifty-Four


Good Luck




This project is perfect for 9-5ers because you basically need just 2 hours 30 minutes of your day time to earn 75,000 Naira monthly and this can be fixed between 8 and 10pm.
Re: Please I Really Need An Advice Urgently..experience Minds by surgevessel: 10:33am On Aug 04, 2022
Sylove:
I started this relationship with my partner about four years ago even though I was warned by my mum not to,i refused cos she had a secret agenda and was divorced too.
This man was managing a business with his friend in the same shop and they were both going along well. Suddenly I came into the picture and jealousy started the friend now realised he had to get married first.
Then I was working at shop rite with my OND and my partner is a Bsc holder. He was serious about the relationship, I met the family and they were such nice people only that they are not wealthy. I felt even if he is not wealthy as far as I am working and he is too at least no p.
To cut the long story short belle enter,my mum took me to his house to go and stay with him saying it was more honourable until he is ready, he accepted and we started living togeda,he nice though, doesn't cheat but most be forced to achieve his goals, that's when I realized he was a hard core gambler who has lost millions in gambling(visual),he broke up with his friend some months after and now dependant on me.
Even though my salary was poor,i still managed to fend for both of us. Even until birth all was on me. I was patient because I knew that things will change one day. Months passed I took in again this time my job was no longer dere I took to the streets and kept on doing menial jobs like sweeping, cleaning till I gave birth even the one he accused me of cheating on him even when I was suffering washing people's mess all this while the both jobs he got he was fired for money wahala
I have begged him to stop this gambling of a thing and it keeps falling on deaf ears. I got a bank job and we were managing but now I can't take it any longer how can I have a man of 40 and still be taking care of him, school fees for kids,feeding and all,i having been the one searching for job every minute online for him but he would Neva do that, go around town and search for job. No.
OK he suddenly came up with an idea that he wants to learn work, on whose account? I mean are men this wicked even telling me that if I think I have had enough I can take my leave and leave his kids behind this was because I told him he didn't want to work and should look for one.
I am writing this because I am sick and tired of this, his mum, Bro and Sis are all complaining of him. Yes he played a part of taking care of the kids at home for a while but I will still come back to do homework and all the house chores and still do the nyt job.
I didnt want this kids to face what I faced when I was young but seems I have a make a decision real quick b4 this man ruins my life.
Jobless and owing debt everywhere and still wouldn't teach his kids. Please what should I do I know I have done a great mistake but at least a lady of 27yrs still have hope.
Please help

Well.. Na you go Oyo and na you go fit tell us how Oyo be for your body.

My questions are numerous and would decide what kind of advice goes well with your situation.

1. Apart from financial irresponsibility, what other attitude put you off about him??

2. Has he ever demonstrated act of violence in the course of frustration?

3. What exactly is your topmost priority growing up and moving on with life worth your dreams.

4. If this guy gets some help from whatever, do you see him loving his family so much than watch them lack or suffer

Just take your time and ponder on these points. Relationship shouldn't be a trauma. Your mental health really matters and should be protected to enable you focus on raising and providing for the kids.
Re: Please I Really Need An Advice Urgently..experience Minds by crackhaus: 10:45am On Aug 04, 2022
Just do what you're sure will be best for you and your kids at this point, whatever that is.
Re: Please I Really Need An Advice Urgently..experience Minds by Nobody: 10:52am On Aug 04, 2022
Sylove:
I started this relationship with my partner about four years ago even though I was warned by my mum not to,i refused cos she had a secret agenda and was divorced too.
This man was managing a business with his friend in the same shop and they were both going along well. Suddenly I came into the picture and jealousy started the friend now realised he had to get married first.
Then I was working at shop rite with my OND and my partner is a Bsc holder. He was serious about the relationship, I met the family and they were such nice people only that they are not wealthy. I felt even if he is not wealthy as far as I am working and he is too at least no p.
To cut the long story short belle enter,my mum took me to his house to go and stay with him saying it was more honourable until he is ready, he accepted and we started living togeda,he nice though, doesn't cheat but most be forced to achieve his goals, that's when I realized he was a hard core gambler who has lost millions in gambling(visual),he broke up with his friend some months after and now dependant on me.
Even though my salary was poor,i still managed to fend for both of us. Even until birth all was on me. I was patient because I knew that things will change one day. Months passed I took in again this time my job was no longer dere I took to the streets and kept on doing menial jobs like sweeping, cleaning till I gave birth even the one he accused me of cheating on him even when I was suffering washing people's mess all this while the both jobs he got he was fired for money wahala
I have begged him to stop this gambling of a thing and it keeps falling on deaf ears. I got a bank job and we were managing but now I can't take it any longer how can I have a man of 40 and still be taking care of him, school fees for kids,feeding and all,i having been the one searching for job every minute online for him but he would Neva do that, go around town and search for job. No.
OK he suddenly came up with an idea that he wants to learn work, on whose account? I mean are men this wicked even telling me that if I think I have had enough I can take my leave and leave his kids behind this was because I told him he didn't want to work and should look for one.
I am writing this because I am sick and tired of this, his mum, Bro and Sis are all complaining of him. Yes he played a part of taking care of the kids at home for a while but I will still come back to do homework and all the house chores and still do the nyt job.
I didnt want this kids to face what I faced when I was young but seems I have a make a decision real quick b4 this man ruins my life.
Jobless and owing debt everywhere and still wouldn't teach his kids. Please what should I do I know I have done a great mistake but at least a lady of 27yrs still have hope.
Please help

i took out time to read this. its so painfull. I am not a woman an i don't need to hear the other side of the story the moment you mentioned gambling and virtual for that mattter. You have to sit him down and talk to him. let him know he can never recover his loses. he should see gambling as demonic and addictive and its high time he stops it. and most importantly let him get a job as that will drive his mind away from it. An idle mind is the devils workshop and it brings greed into the mind. greed to make money without stress. Also if he ask for money, tell him you don't have and ask him what he wants to use the money for. if you have the money, you can go and get the stuff for him.

A man at 40, still gambling its terrible. i am no supporter of addictive gambling. and virtual for that matter. my dear don't stresss your self in prayer as some will say here. he needs to be talked to seriously... i know its not easy to stop an addiction but he will surely stop.

lastly, you mentioned devorce and who among the two of you was once devorce and what was the reason behind that? people need to learn from this

3 Likes

Re: Please I Really Need An Advice Urgently..experience Minds by Sylove: 11:02am On Aug 04, 2022
My mum
godfrey02:


i took out time to read this. its so painfull. I am not a woman an i don't need to hear the other side of the story the moment you mentioned gambling and virtual for that mattter. You have to sit him down and talk to him. let him know he can never recover his loses. he should see gambling as demonic and addictive and its high time he stops it. and most importantly let him get a job as that will drive his mind away from it. An idle mind is the devils workshop and it brings greed into the mind. greed to make money without stress. Also if he ask for money, tell him you don't have and ask him what he wants to use the money for. if you have the money, you can go and get the stuff for him.

A man at 40, still gambling its terrible. i am no supporter of addictive gambling. and virtual for that matter. my dear don't stresss your self in prayer as some will say here. he needs to be talked to seriously... i know its not easy to stop an addiction but he will surely stop.

lastly, you mentioned devorce and who among the two of you was once devorce and what was the reason behind that? people need to learn from this
Re: Please I Really Need An Advice Urgently..experience Minds by Sylove: 11:02am On Aug 04, 2022
I really appreciate this comment
God bless
godfrey02:


i took out time to read this. its so painfull. I am not a woman an i don't need to hear the other side of the story the moment you mentioned gambling and virtual for that mattter. You have to sit him down and talk to him. let him know he can never recover his loses. he should see gambling as demonic and addictive and its high time he stops it. and most importantly let him get a job as that will drive his mind away from it. An idle mind is the devils workshop and it brings greed into the mind. greed to make money without stress. Also if he ask for money, tell him you don't have and ask him what he wants to use the money for. if you have the money, you can go and get the stuff for him.

A man at 40, still gambling its terrible. i am no supporter of addictive gambling. and virtual for that matter. my dear don't stresss your self in prayer as some will say here. he needs to be talked to seriously... i know its not easy to stop an addiction but he will surely stop.

lastly, you mentioned devorce and who among the two of you was once devorce and what was the reason behind that? people need to learn from this
Re: Please I Really Need An Advice Urgently..experience Minds by Lastpharoah33: 11:05am On Aug 04, 2022
He still believe he can recoup his losses, hence not heeding to your advice to stop playing.

If he is pious, trying arranging a meeting with the church leader or a senior member, someone he holds in high regard.

You are too young to be going through all of this.
Re: Please I Really Need An Advice Urgently..experience Minds by Sylove: 11:10am On Aug 04, 2022
Hmm
1. I made mention of gambling and he is too negative minded, like you bring up a topic and boom he is already talking of the negative side.
2.yes once flogged me with a marchet when he thought I cheated
3. My kids matter a lot to me
4.He is a sure dem giver. I mean if he has he can give and likes quality life for his family that's what weakens me most
surgevessel:


Well.. Na you go Oyo and na you go fit tell us how Oyo be for your body.

My questions are numerous and would decide what kind of advice goes well with your situation.

1. Apart from financial irresponsibility, what other attitude put you off about him??

2. Has he ever demonstrated act of violence in the course of frustration?

3. What exactly is your topmost priority growing up and moving on with life worth your dreams.

4. If this guy gets some help from whatever, do you see him loving his family so much than watch them lack or suffer

Just take your time and ponder on these points. Relationship shouldn't be a trauma. Your mental health really matters and should be protected to enable you focus on raising and providing for the kids.
Re: Please I Really Need An Advice Urgently..experience Minds by faithfull18(f): 12:02pm On Aug 04, 2022
Hmmn.
Re: Please I Really Need An Advice Urgently..experience Minds by Pierced(f): 12:29pm On Aug 04, 2022
xcclectures:







Na still money problem.

Let's tackle it financially. I run a digital agency and both you can work with me and earn 75,000 Naira monthly. Leave theocracies and face practical, both of you havigne xtre 150k will chage and completely tranform your current realities..


When the student is ready, the teacher will appear. I am here...Read the brief below and contact me.


Work remotely and earn between 75,000 and 150,000 Naira


We are recruiting creative content writers to join our team of creatives.


All you need to do is write articles daily from home using either a PC, Smart phone or Tab.


Training will be provided so both new and seasoned writers are encouraged to apply.

Writers on the team are required to write between 2,000 and 4,000 words daily and the moment the number of words written attains 41,000 words milestone, payment of 50,000 Naira is made to you. And the next " 41,000 Words cycle " begins the next project.


No hidden biases. We are currently recruiting just 10 new writers to join our team, so hurry and take advantage of this window of opportunity.


Note payment is done strictly when the total word count hits 41,000 words. If you achieve this in two weeks you will be paid then, if achieved in three weeks, you will be paid then


You will be required to write varieties of articles ranging from News articles. Business Articles. Tech Articles ..Cryptocurrency articles.. Health Articles. Sports Articles. Ebooks, Press release statements ...



Send in your application. My WhatsApp contact - Zero Seven Zero Five Four Zero One Fourteen Fifty-Four


Good Luck




This project is perfect for 9-5ers because you basically need just 2 hours 30 minutes of your day time to earn 75,000 Naira monthly and this can be fixed between 8 and 10pm.


Can u give ur phone no.......or give me ur email address so I can send a msg.
Re: Please I Really Need An Advice Urgently..experience Minds by JOACHINpedro: 12:32pm On Aug 04, 2022
He has a business plan, help him plan and execute it

1 Like

Re: Please I Really Need An Advice Urgently..experience Minds by Hed0nist: 1:41pm On Aug 04, 2022
Have you heard of the sunk cost fallacy? How many times does history have to repeat itself before you finally use your brain? Separate from him jor. He can still be a father to his children but he doesn’t have to be your husband. Addiction is a very tricky thing. Never blame yourself or sacrifice too much for an addict’s behavior. They’ll always choose that thing before you. Every time.

Better your self, earn, save, invest better the lot of your children. But you’re not obligated to feed a man who hasn’t even married you and who is comfortable watching you toil in pregnancy to feed him.

1 Like

Re: Please I Really Need An Advice Urgently..experience Minds by nairalanderr: 1:49pm On Aug 04, 2022
betting is the main issue. he was able to raise millions once he can do it again but only if he's able to stop betting.

1 Like 1 Share

Re: Please I Really Need An Advice Urgently..experience Minds by xcclectures: 2:50pm On Aug 04, 2022
Pierced:


Can u give ur phone no.......or give me ur email address so I can send a msg.



My phone number is in the write-up. Check patiently

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