Good evening, pls I need help on something
I don't even know how to put it well, but I will try my best to explain a little..and I seek sincere advice from matured and experienced ppl on the forum.

I am a type that when I love ppl, I love them wholeheartedly..to the extent that I will give in all my best to them.. be it family members or non. When I tell you I gat your back, then I truly mean it. But the problem now is, when these ppl hurt me. I don't know how to handle it, I don't even know if I will call it unforgiving spirit or maybe cause I remember things alot, I will surely not forget.

It's not as if I won't forgive them o, I will but, to make that relationship between me and that person smooth back.. it's not possible.. the distance will always be there.. tho before I get angry or pick offence it takes long, but once it happens like this! I know I have lost relationship with that soul.

Some of my relatives(extended fam) offended me, and since about 3 yrs now, these ppl have been sending different ppl just to beg me and talk to me etc.. in order to make things back, but it's just not working!. Cuz I know myself.
And I am a type that, once I vex, I don't look back..even if the person has done a lot of things etc.. I have tried my best but it's just not working. And I understand the fact that there is no how there won't be argument among humans, it's not possible.

My greatest fear now is, what if I marry, is this how It will be towards my husband, someone I claim I love? Pls how do I tackle this problem before I reach that stage, pls I need sincere word of wisdom from elders, else why I come to a faceless forum to pour out my mind.

Hello please, anyone ?

Hello,

Thanks for sharing. I found a lot of interesting information here. Dunkin Runs on You

Thanks

Shay you no get any word of advice ni, you
only came to tap abi ... Okkk thanks for appreciating

Andrea0574:
Thanks for sharing. I found a lot of interesting information here.

Hello, anyone?? Pls cc: Lalasticlala, Mynd44 can you help me move to front page, maybe it will draw elders attention.

Oga o, no body?

? Anyone??

It's okay to forgive people but keep some distance to avoid a repetition. The real issue is if you are still bitter about what happened.
So the question you need to answer is why you are keeping the distance or cutting off from people who had hurt you. Is it fear of getting hurt again or just an egoistic character you have gotten used to over the years?
Of course any character you have now will not change overnight when you get married. So you must really ask yourself these questions.
Why do you think divorce rates are all time high? Cause people marry because of what they want for themselves and when the expectations are unmet, the distancing and fights start

Anuoluwa12345:
Good evening, pls I need help on something
I don't even know how to put it well, but I will try my best to explain a little..and I seek sincere advice from matured and experienced ppl on the forum.

I am a type that when I love ppl, I love them wholeheartedly..to the extent that I will give in all my best to them.. be it family members or non. When I tell you I gat your back, then I truly mean it. But the problem now is, when these ppl hurt me. I don't know how to handle it, I don't even know if I will call it unforgiving spirit or maybe cause I remember things alot, I will surely not forget.

It's not as if I won't forgive them o, I will but, to make that relationship between me and that person smooth back.. it's not possible.. the distance will always be there.. tho before I get angry or pick offence it takes long, but once it happens like this! I know I have lost relationship with that soul.

Some of my relatives(extended fam) offended me, and since about 3 yrs now, these ppl have been sending different ppl just to beg me and talk to me etc.. in order to make things back, but it's just not working!. Cuz I know myself.
And I am a type that, once I vex, I don't look back..even if the person has done a lot of things etc.. I have tried my best but it's just not working. And I understand the fact that there is no how there won't be argument among humans, it's not possible.

My greatest fear now is, what if I marry, is this how It will be towards my husband, someone I claim I love? Pls how do I tackle this problem before I reach that stage, pls I need sincere word of wisdom from elders, else why I come to a faceless forum to pour out my mind.

I am the same way but I compromise because no one is perfect (especially me).
I usually rate the 'offence' and decide which one I can live with or not because me sef dey offend people ( abi you no dey offend people by actions or inactions?)
Let me give you an example
Recently my girlfriend told me that my guy(not friend)was trying to woo her by saying nasty things about me. You think say I go get anything to do with that kind person? Never.

Another example na person wey dey my house,as e dey go ,e steal something. I vex but I no throwey am, we still dey jam and hook up outside but never in my house...


As far as the husband thing wey you talk, you must be loyal and understand your husband or else abeg just stay single o....Broken home for Naija dey pain woman pass Pluss the societal stigma...
Get help from a therapist