Idk. Trust is the basis of a relationship. If there's no trust then the relationship is a sinking sand.

Forgiveness is also important. No one is perfect.

the pain of wondering is worst,

I'm a realist.

The pain of knowing is worst for me.

With wondering there is still an element of doubt. Knowing its true is like a deadly blow!

BOTH are bad. But I would say the pain of "wondering" which translates to contstant worrying wondering if, how, where, when, why, who, what and so on. At least by knowing, you can make a decision of what to do and try to mend and get through rather than sweating bulletts all the time wondering what's going on. But regardless, like I said, both are bad to know and wonder about. Because then when I think about after knowing, you wonder and/or worrying if it's still happening. Too devastating and cruel for anybody has to endure or go through. I'd rather not have either!

The pain of knowing is actually better especially when he tells you himself and begs for forgiveness, you willl be at peace deceiving yourself that it won't happen again than wondering each time about who the faceless animal is. Then anybabe you see close to him becomes a victim of ur suspicion.

While wondering, it definitely means something is wrong to put his/her trust in question, at the same time there's the fragment of hope that your wondering and doubts are baseless, that nothing is really happening. Though the wondering can drive one nuts, you still hope and pray silently that it's not so.

And in the case of knowing, you're faced with the reality and after getting over the shock or whatever, you can decide on what to do.

I believe the pain of knowing is more but even at that, I'd rather be in the know, feel the pain, get over it and move on.

Iranoladun:

I'm a realist.

The pain of knowing is worst for me.

With wondering there is still an element of doubt. Knowing its true is like a deadly blow!

Exactly.

If I'd seen your post earlier, I'd have 'gbammed' it instead of typing mine.