Is it really boring there?

Do you go weeks without talking to anybody?

Is it true that white man no send anybody papa. Everybody dey mind him own business?

I heard seeing a woman/man to be in a relationship with na rocket science.

Is it true that someone you talked to this morning and conversed well might pretend he doesn't know you when he sees you in the evening.

You and your next door neighbor might not talk for weeks ?

I was told they put up fake smiles there alot.

Is it true that there are countless tales of people dying in their homes for several weeks and nobody will even know.

You miss Nigeria and the lagos vibe once in a while don't you? Sometimes you just wish you could return back.

Depression is real.

Always call your friends and relatives.....Very important.

I think all this would apply if the person was an ass.

One can, instead of waiting to be spoken to, speak to one's neighbours or those one meets on the streets or in a bus or at work or in a pub or the person in the shop you get your groceries from or the Jehova Witness who knocks on your door on Saturday morning, etc etc etc, so there's no reason not to talk to anyone for weeks unless one has chips on one's shoulders, in which case, if you did die no one might notice your chips are missing, though you got to wonder why your boss wouldn't investigate why you are not at work.

It's only boring for boring people here.

dedonfranco:
Depression is real.

Always call your friends and relatives.....Very important.

See that, op? "Always call" instead of waiting to be called.

If you go to the affluent areas of Nigeria like Asokoro or banana island, you will notice the calm and serenity in the environment and people, meanwhile, you'll never get such vibes in Oshodi or Mushin.

The point I'm driving at is that lots of Nigerians move to the West and experience serenity pro max, making them not know what to do with themselves. Norway/Sweden/Finland are almost perfect societies, you literarily can't complain about anything, but you may be bored to death.

Perfection is somewhat boring. Nigerians are not lively by genes, but due to the chaos and hecticness associated with underdeveloped societies. And when they move to foreign countries, the changes in lifestyle can be an issue.

Exactly bro! These guys don't understand. Any environment that has a touch of affluence will tend to be quiet and isolated. If you go to most GRA's in Nigeria, people living there live an introverted life. You cannot compare the social atmosphere of Ikoyi, Ikeja GRA or V.I. to Mushin, Agege or Ikorodu. Impossible. Nigerians are so used to living in a chaotic environment that they see organized societies as "absurd".

pansophist:
If you go the affluent areas of Nigeria like Asokoro or banana island, you will notice the calm and serenity in the environment and people, meanwhile, you'll never get such vibes in oshodi or Mushin.

The point I'm driving at is that lots of Nigerians move to the West and experience serenity pro max, making them not knowing what to do with themselves. It's basically an introduction to oneself.

Perfection is somewhat boring. Nigerians are not lively by genes, but due to the chaos and hectic associated with an underdeveloped societies. And when they move to foreign countries, the changes of lifestyle can be an issue.

I gat nothing to say... Pansophist and gforce5 have said it all.

Besides, I think these guys living in these serene western countries still catch fun, though not the trenches kind of fun we're generally fond of here.

Is it really boring there? t[b]o some people sanity is boring, your neighbor does not care about your life as it should be, many people stay at home abroad and complain of boredom lol[/b]

Do you go weeks without talking to anybody? you will talk to friends, people at work, church , people in nigerian or african communities na

Is it true that white man no send anybody papa. Everybody dey mind him own business? most people mind their business, there are still few who will engage you in conversations

I heard seeing a woman/man to be in a relationship with na rocket science.--- there are married people, common law , boy friend and girl friends, hookup/fwb. many people dont also see the gain of being in a relationship and only do casual sex, no one will judge you like in Nigeria

Is it true that someone you talked to this morning and conversed well might pretend he doesn't know you when he sees you in the evening. - false

You and your next door neighbor might not talk for weeks ? i stayed in uk for 3 years, at a particular place i stayed for 1 year plus i never talked to any of my neighbor or vice versa. my current apartment in Canada i have talked to like 2 of my neighbors, is it bad to mind ya business?

I was told they put up fake smiles there alot.- is it not same in Nigeria

Is it true that there are countless tales of people dying in their homes for several weeks and nobody will even know. - happens in few instances not countless

You miss Nigeria and the Lagos vibe once in a while don't you? Sometimes you just wish you could return back.- there are Nigerian clubs , bars and restaurants , you will get Lagos vibes there na plus parties organized by Nigerians.

the major issue is that Nigerians go abroad and want same lifestyle in Nigeria to apply there. The ladies too that could not get a man when they lived in 9ja with over 100m black men live will be complaining of not seeing a man where there are less than 100k 9ja men , they will go on dating apps and be looking for God fearing man in a country where 90% are not even religious lol abegi. The men too have nothing to offer except money like they did in nigeria but many people here no care about you small change

gforce5:
Exactly bro! These guys don't understand. Any environment that has a touch of affluence will tend to be quiet and isolated. If you go to most GRA's in Nigeria, people living there live an introverted life. You cannot compare the social atmosphere of Ikoyi, Ikeja GRA or V.I. to Mushin, Agege or Ikorodu. Impossible. Nigerians are so used to living in a chaotic environment that they see organized societies as "absurd".

Yes to your post.

But there has to be a balance in-between. I can tell you depending on the country, state & city you move to, the more lonely and depressed you might be. Countries like Denmark, Norway, and Sweden, I can never move there. Even in Canada, apart from Toronto, I doubt if I can live any where else because of less socialisation. I want to come out & talk to people, human interaction is important. For people living down south in America, cities like Atlanta, Miami have so many activities, clubs and beaches. Therefore you get to socialise more.

I have also experienced Winter depression & I can tell you I hate it with my every being. Depression hits at the core during this period.

truthsayer009:


Yes to your post.

But there has to be a balance in-between. I can tell you depending on the country, state & city you move to, the more lonely and depressed you might be. Countries like Denmark, Norway, and Sweden, I can never move there. Even in Canada, apart from Toronto, I doubt if I can live any where else because of less socialisation. I want to come out & talk to people, human interaction is important. For people living down south in America, cities like Atlanta, Miami have so many activities, clubs and beaches. Therefore you get to socialise more.

I have also experienced Winter depression & I can tell you I hate it with my every being. Depression hits at the core during this period.

I still think south America is the best place to live. Warm weather, hospitable culture, beautiful landscape, good foods, and a small population in such a huge landmass. Nigeria, Egypt, and Ethiopia are more populated than the whole of South America, but the continent has a higher GDP than Africa as a whole.

And it's so damn multiracial, especially in Brazil. You can look anyhow and be Brazillian if you speak Portuguese. All shades of humanity exist in BR. It is like living in a racial utopia. These countries fit the Naija extroverted temperament. As for Scandinavia, one has to be antisocial to live there permanently. Even if their salaries are high, few EU citizens move there compare to the broke ones like Portugal for example.

pansophist:


I still think south America is the best place to live. Warm weather, hospitable culture, beautiful landscape, good foods, and a small population in such a huge landmass. Nigeria, Egypt, and Ethiopia are more populated than the whole of South America, but the continent has a higher GDP than Africa as a whole.

And it's so damn multiracial, especially in Brazil. You can look anyhow and be Brazillian if you speak Portuguese. All shades of humanity exist in BR. It is like living in a racial utopia. These countries fit the Naija extroverted temperament. As for Scandinavia, one has to be antisocial to live there permanently. Even if their salaries are high, few EU citizens move there compare to the broke ones like Portugal for example.

Thank you, at least you understand what I was saying, some countries give you more social advantage than others. I heard some good things about Portugal and Spain too.

This earning power of some of the Scandinavian countries is not even a big deal to me because I cannot trade my life for money, what is the point in earning all that money and cannot live a decent life, all for big wages.

I remember when a journalist asked Kjetil a Norwegian football manager why he left Norway. He said "Norway's boring! you know you'll die at the age of 90 the day you were born."

Just imagine being already sure you'll live 90+ from the day you were born lol. Boring country equates to less crime.

ednut1:
Is it really boring there? t[b]o some people sanity is boring, your neighbor does not care about your life as it should be, many people stay at home abroad and complain of boredom lol[/b]

Do you go weeks without talking to anybody? you will talk to friends, people at work, church , people in nigerian or african communities na

Is it true that white man no send anybody papa. Everybody dey mind him own business? most people mind their business, there are still few who will engage you in conversations

I heard seeing a woman/man to be in a relationship with na rocket science.--- there are married people, common law , boy friend and girl friends, hookup/fwb. many people dont also see the gain of being in a relationship and only do casual sex, no one will judge you like in Nigeria

Is it true that someone you talked to this morning and conversed well might pretend he doesn't know you when he sees you in the evening. - false

You and your next door neighbor might not talk for weeks ? i stayed in uk for 3 years, at a particular place i stayed for 1 year plus i never talked to any of my neighbor or vice versa. my current apartment in Canada i have talked to like 2 of my neighbors, is it bad to mind ya business?

I was told they put up fake smiles there alot.- is it not same in Nigeria

Is it true that there are countless tales of people dying in their homes for several weeks and nobody will even know. - happens in few instances not countless

You miss Nigeria and the Lagos vibe once in a while don't you? Sometimes you just wish you could return back.- there are Nigerian clubs , bars and restaurants , you will get Lagos vibes there na plus parties organized by Nigerians.

the major issue is that Nigerians go abroad and want same lifestyle in Nigeria to apply there. The ladies too that could not get a man when they lived in 9ja with over 100m black men live will be complaining of not seeing a man where there are less than 100k 9ja men , they will go on dating apps and be looking for God fearing man in a country where 90% are not even religious lol abegi. The men too have nothing to offer except money like they did in nigeria but many people here no care about you small change

Why did you leave UK for Canada?

sharpwriter:

Why did you leave UK for Canada?

i left uk for Nigeria. I came back to nigeria in 2008. Went to Canada 12 years later

ednut1:
i left uk for Nigeria. I came back to nigeria in 2008. Went to Canada 12 years later

Ok bro.

I get what you are saying. Most countries in the Northern hemisphere tend to be cold and isolated compared to countries in the Southern hemisphere. Scandinavia, despite its very high standard of living, is a cold and depressing region. I have heard that Finland is an extremely lonely and miserable place. I believe that the weather plays a huge factor in this scenario. The southern parts of the U.S. is much more livelier than the cities in the North. Nevertheless, Nigerians are very extroverted by nature and find it difficult to adapt to environments that are introverted.

truthsayer009:


Yes to your post.

But there has to be a balance in-between. I can tell you depending on the country, state & city you move to, the more lonely and depressed you might be. Countries like Denmark, Norway, and Sweden, I can never move there. Even in Canada, apart from Toronto, I doubt if I can live any where else because of less socialisation. I want to come out & talk to people, human interaction is important. For people living down south in America, cities like Atlanta, Miami have so many activities, clubs and beaches. Therefore you get to socialise more.

I have also experienced Winter depression & I can tell you I hate it with my every being. Depression hits at the core during this period.

Nope. Well, you’re not entirely correct.

I’ve got quite a number of Africans in my apartment block. I’m friends with a lot of nationals; some are my colleagues. But here’s the thing:

Firstly, hanging out costs money. And you know you’ve got to save as much as you can to afford bills. Consequently, hangouts are few and far between.

Secondly, I’ve come to understand that most people live by the clock; there’s literally a time for everything. Most certainly, it isn’t always “talking to the neighbor” time.

budaatum:
I think all this would apply if the person was an ass.

One can, instead of waiting to be spoken to, speak to one's neighbours or those one meets on the streets or in a bus or at work or in a pub or the person in the shop you get your groceries from or the Jehova Witness who knocks on your door on Saturday morning, etc etc etc, so there's no reason not to talk to anyone for weeks unless one has chips on one's shoulders, in which case, if you did die no one might notice your chips are missing, though you got to wonder why your boss wouldn't investigate why you are not at work.

It's only boring for boring people here.

It doesn't work like that over there.

SergeantTitus:

It doesn't work like that over there.

It works like that where I am in London SE14. And it worked in every other country I've ever been to, though I would suppose it would depend on the sort of person you yourself are and if you are friendly or not.

You can even call up the Samaritans if your loneliness gets to suicide level, or join a friend or dating app or a gym or yoga club. And there's alway a church nearby where they'd love to be your friend.

Over 40 years now and I am obviously still alive.

budaatum:


It works like that where I am in London SE14. And it worked in every other country I've ever been to, though I would suppose it would depend on the sort of person you yourself are and if you are friendly or not.

You can even call up the Samaritans if your loneliness gets to suicide level, or join a friend or dating app or a gym or yoga club. And there's alway a church nearby where they'd love to be your friend.

Over 40 years now and I am obviously still alive.

Thats for london but in north of england is not like that and it is not because of your personality. It is purely a cultural thing, although somethimes it can from a superiority mindset.

It is a tough battle to stay alone abroad with no family or siblings around but if you find yourself in the situation take advantage of various things around you. My work out model
1. wake up in the morning
2. Pray if i remember and if not keep on going
3. Jump to tiktok and wassap for 30 minutes laugh and fun
4. get on the phone to talk to family and friends
5. Go to work 12hrs shift.
6. Make sure i eat good (prefer to cook my own food)
7.Go on a cruise sometimes
8. Tiktok is my partner before going to bed
Depression is real but try to get busy and make sure you talk to somebody even if you don't like them.
You can never be depressed with tiktok.

SergeantTitus:
Is it really boring there?

Do you go weeks without talking to anybody?

Is it true that white man no send anybody papa. Everybody dey mind him own business?

I heard seeing a woman/man to be in a relationship with na rocket science.

Is it true that someone you talked to this morning and conversed well might pretend he doesn't know you when he sees you in the evening.

You and your next door neighbor might not talk for weeks ?

I was told they put up fake smiles there alot.

Is it true that there are countless tales of people dying in their homes for several weeks and nobody will even know.

You miss Nigeria and the lagos vibe once in a while don't you? Sometimes you just wish you could return back.

jesmond3945:

Thats for london but in north of england is not like that and it is not because of your personality. It is purely a cultural thing, although somethimes it can from a superiority mindset.

London is actually the most unfriendly place in the whole of the United Kingdom due to the fact that most people don't know each other.

Anywhere else in UK is more friendly if only because you'd be new there and the people are curious to know who lives in their neighbourhood so they would approach you.

But if you don't believe me, stand at any bus stop in UK and smile at the people you meet there. You'd find they are likely to say good day to you.

budaatum:


London is actually the most unfriendly place in the whole of the United Kingdom due to the fact that most people don't know each other.

Anywhere else in UK is more friendly if only because you'd be new there and the people are curious to know who lives in their neighbourhood so they would approach you.

But if you don't believe me, stand at any bus stop in UK and smile at the people you meet there. You'd find they are likely to say good day to you.

The Op mentioned very clear items that shows he is versed in what happens socially in the West. The same person saying Hi to you would ignore you when next he sees you. Your neighbour that approaches you today will ignore you tommorow. Unless you dont have self worth. The person will clearly make you understand he or she is just tolerating you. In other climes like America and canada the experience might not be the same. London is a multicultural place but i can bet that if someones knows you tommorow if he sees you he would hail you but same cannot be said in the north and in other countries. Is even worse that blacks dont relate with each other unless they know you well.

SergeantTitus:
Is it really boring there?

Do you go weeks without talking to anybody?

Is it true that white man no send anybody papa. Everybody dey mind him own business?

I heard seeing a woman/man to be in a relationship with na rocket science.

Is it true that someone you talked to this morning and conversed well might pretend he doesn't know you when he sees you in the evening.

You and your next door neighbor might not talk for weeks ?

I was told they put up fake smiles there alot.

Is it true that there are countless tales of people dying in their homes for several weeks and nobody will even know.

You miss Nigeria and the lagos vibe once in a while don't you? Sometimes you just wish you could return back.

Yes you are right but not all the places.

SergeantTitus:
Is it really boring there?

Do you go weeks without talking to anybody?

Is it true that white man no send anybody papa. Everybody dey mind him own business?

I heard seeing a woman/man to be in a relationship with na rocket science.

Is it true that someone you talked to this morning and conversed well might pretend he doesn't know you when he sees you in the evening.

You and your next door neighbor might not talk for weeks ?

I was told they put up fake smiles there alot.

Is it true that there are countless tales of people dying in their homes for several weeks and nobody will even know.

You miss Nigeria and the lagos vibe once in a while don't you? Sometimes you just wish you could return back.

Being bored is a function of where you live. An Edo man who finds himself in Sokoto will likely be bored.
For me, I haven't been bored in Canada one bit. In fact, my social life drastically improved in Canada. You can't be bored when you have Nigerian churches packed with Nigerians of all tribes willing to mingle with each other.
This summer alone, I have attended uncountable number of events from barbecues to sports activities to organized Nigerian picnics etc.
I come back home with 24/7 light and wifi, I watch all Nigerian and international comedy skits on YouTube, that one alone can keep you laughing and busy the whole day.
Nigerians who are bored are likely ones who live in areas without large Nigerian community or those ones who don't want to relate with fellow Nigerians.

jesmond3945:

The Op mentioned very clear items that shows he is versed in what happens socially in the West. The same person saying Hi to you would ignore you when next he sees you. Your neighbour that approaches you today will ignore you tommorow. Unless you dont have self worth. The person will clearly make you understand he or she is just tolerating you. In other climes like America and canada the experience might not be the same. London is a multicultural place but i can bet that if someones knows you tommorow if he sees you he would hail you but same cannot be said in the north and in other countries. Is even worse that blacks dont relate with each other unless they know you well.

Well, you are going to have to forgive me, but the op has in no way described what I experience in the West. And neither has the op claimed to have had any experience gained from living in the West, so I can hardly take what he describes as fact.

What I do know is, if one has the belief that Westerners would behave to one as the op has described, one would behave in such a way that would make what the op describes a self-fulfilling fact. But the op would need to understand how he caused people to ignore him and treat him that way, especially if others do not experience what he experiences.

budaatum:

Well, you are going to have to forgive me, but the op has in no way described what I experience in the West. And neither has the op claimed to have had any experience gained from living in the West, so I can hardly take what he describes as fact.

What I do know is, if one has the belief that Westerners would behave to one as the op has described, one would behave in such a way that would make what the op describes a self-fulfilling fact. But the op would need to understand how he caused people to ignore him and treat him that way, especially if others do not experience what he experiences.

To avoid this argument, just live and work in the north of england, north of france or belgium especially or in scandinavian countries like finland or norway or eastern europe like lithuania, bulgaria, europe. Not visit but live, study and work there.
This might not happen in all of europe and america.
Visiting a place and living there are 2 different experiences entirely.

jesmond3945:

To avoid this argument, just live and work in the north of england, north of france or belgium especially or in scandinavian countries like finland or norway or eastern europe like lithuania, bulgaria, europe. Not visit but live, study and work there.
This might not happen in all of europe and america.
Visiting a place and living there are 2 different experiences entirely.

"Over 40 years", is not "Visiting a place"! And I have lived and worked in the North of England too.

everything ednut1 said, except that I don't wish to return to 9ja. I have only been back once since I left and I was desperate to change my ticket to return back to the UK after 2-3 days in Nigeria. I have not gone back since. I am extremely used to the quiet life and civilisation here. Sometimes, I wonder how I grew up in 9ja, Lasgidi for that matter lol.

opeyy:
everything ednut1 said, except that I don't wish to return to 9ja. I have only been back once since I left and I was desperate to change my ticket to return back to the UK after 2-3 days in Nigeria. I have not gone back since. I am extremely used to the quiet life and civilisation here. Sometimes, I wonder how I grew up in 9ja, Lasgidi for that matter lol.

Please tell us if you "Seems To Be Dying Of Lonliness And Depression" abroad.

Maybe they will believe you better.

budaatum:


"Over 40 years", is not "Visiting a place"! And I have lived and worked in the North of England too.

okay