I am 19 yrs old. I feel like ending it all. I am hoplesss. I have uncurable ear problem, brain rupture and I can't see well with my right eye . I can't retain anything I read at all. I forget everything. I always get lost in new environment. I got admission to study medicine at a prestigious Nigerian university. I am the only hope of my struggling father. How can somebody who have brain damage and forget everything study medicine? Infact I can't memorise a simple sentence. I can't assimilate anything. I have no friends. Nobody is my friend. Infact I have no friends number on my phone. Nobody wants to give me their number. I feel like commiting suicide. What is holding me back is the fear of going to hell fire. I am totally hopeless and fed up.

I have gone to hospitals and spiritualist but my problem still persists.

I mean brain rupture caused by built up pressure in the ears

smadas:
1. I am 19 yrs old. I feel like ending it all. I am hoplesss.
2. I have uncurable ear problem, brain aneurysm and my right eye is damaged. I can't retain anything I read at all. I forget everything. I always get lost in new environment. I got admission to study medicine at a prestigious Nigerian university.
3. I am the only hope of my struggling father.
4. How can somebody who have brain damage and forget everything study medicine? Infact I can't memorise a simple sentence. I can't assimilate anything.
5. I have no friends. Nobody is my friend. Infact I have no friends number on my phone. Nobody wants to give me their number. I feel like commiting suicide. What is holding me back is the fear of going to hell fire. I am totally hopeless and fed up.

1. You are depressed so consider seeking the help of a professional mental health therapist or counselor.
2. You are ill, and as such are unable to study medicine. Not everyone has to be a doctor, so is there a reason why it seems you are saying, "it is either Medicine or death" for you?
3. Why is a 19-year-old the hope of his adult father?
4. If you have memory issues, why not look for a course or trade that is less tasking?
5. Not everyone out there has friends to call on a regular basis, and honestly. You don't need to have friends to live and breath. This year alone, I have only 12 calls in total, 11 of them to my mother and 1 to my brother.