I often sit and wonder why the number of divorce cases bedevilling our courts is increasing geometrically every year.

Funny enough, a little digging will reveal that these were the same couple who were once madly in love and swore to spend the rest of their lives together.

But nothing happens when nothing happens, we often say.

This presupposes that for divorce to finally happen, either of the marrying parties must have regretted getting married to their spouse and probably resents him or her.

So let’s discuss and learn from ourselves as we could be unknowingly saving or fixing the next marriage that is on the verge of collapsing.

So, permit me to poke my nose a bit and ask; why do you regret getting married to your spouse?

Good question, I think young people nowadays regret getting married because some things they often attach too much importance to are evanescent, misplaced priorities.

Nobody is willing to be loyal

Sometimes, it could be as a result of not being able to forgive a spouse who erred.

Since you can't leave the marriage at that point, you wait for the trigger that breaks the camel back.

Just a little thing that means nothing to everyone becomes the cause of separation.

Staying back when you could leave just make things worse.

Marriage is not meant to be endured but enjoyed. When you have started enduring and tolerating so much just know it's time to step up and fix whatever went wrong.

Everyone has his or her elastic limit. You might just be hanging on because your limit has not been exceeded.

Let me know when this hits front page

A girl at the peak of her sexual life, hopping on dïcks for fun, pleasure and money. Then suddenly you tell her to leave all those men to stick to one díck alone. Who we kidding?!?


She always finds herself chatting with that ex and getting back to him for a “one last time” of rolling between the sheets that will never be the last, because like an addiction, she will always crave for more.


Look at the celebrities who called off their weddings last year and the various sorry stories their partners had to say and you will admit there’s more to this than meets the eye. Ignore the expensive, glamorous weddings and love stories. See beyond the uniformed attires couples flaunt in public and you be killing yourself asking “God when”. Just like recharge cards or data getting exhausted and you be holding just another smartphones and managing to enjoy the games in it without getting access to internet service and all, that’s how the love in people’s marriages has expired, dragged and grated to the dust. What’s holding them back is endurance, very high levels of tolerance, and the shame the long arduous journey a Divorce proceeding brings. In some cases it’s the children.


But again let’s not be too critical of that institution called marriage. Because just like every other thing in life, it’s always a gamble. It could go either ways. You move to a new town/country in search of greener pastures, you could either win or loose. You buy a new car and the very next day the brake fails you in the face of a moving trailer. Same with walking down the aisle with someone who was once a stranger to you, anything could happen.

To the men out there, do not settle down out of pressure the society brings. Make sure you know your partner inside out and make sure your goals and dreams are synchronized, make sure the love you have for her is real and stay true to working it out while making efforts to improve yourselves.

For the ladies out there, omo una matter dey tire me sha. It’s true a lady marries who is ready and not who she loves, and ends up cheating on the hubby with the guys she gave her heart to. True love never lies remember. Again let me not be too one sided about it because the infidelity pendulum swings both ways. I left Abuja for Port Harcourt in August to Attend the wedding of a childhood friend to his long time lawyer girlfriend. This guy is my truest friend turned brother and his wife has become a sister to me. Now this guy we used to run real deep sh*ts with in the past including gang bangs and 3smes. He called me in December, few months after his big and glamorous, talk-of-the town wedding asking if I’m in town cause he’s bringing a mistress over for yet another session with me at a hideout we used to share. The wife dey house o I was in town but told him I’m in Lagos just so I wouldn’t have to participate or be an accessory to the start of his adulterous ways. This guy settled out of pressure since he’s made, wealthy with properties to his name and lots of women upon him like bees to Honey. He always tells me marriage is never a do or die. He will quit anytime he feels he can’t take it anymore. At a time the wife will begin to suspect and believe her instincts that this guy is having affairs but will seek to turn a blind eye for the sake of peace and that’s what couples today are enduring.


Then I shake my head and I laugh at that institution called marriage, it’s actually built on a foundation of love, lies, deception, tolerance and endurance.


Not for the faint hearted really.

I wish all married couples in this part of the world all the happiness they can get.


Well as much as one could be happy in an institution as barbaric as marriage.



My peace I leave you Abeg,

Most men and women who divorced their marriages had on many occasions dumped their boyfriends or girl friends while dating.

And that is why it was easy for them to divorce at will.

Watch out for any of these traits in men and women in relationships

Because a good number of today's marriages are built on wrong foundations.

Fornicators getting married, marriage of convenience, marriage due to pressure, marriage due to materialism etc .

It's a new year, I can't be talking too much.

Just observing

@ NoahHadNoArk, you have put it as frankly as it can be said.

For many ladies it's not love. It's love for material things that pushes them to commit to a man.

Many men too, like your friend, do not respect the institution enough to forgo all others no matter how tempting the situation is, and stick to their wives.

You'll agree with me the reason why many marriages fail is due to infidelity and others.
It takes a strong will not to cheat. It's a decision one intentionally makes, otherwise, the marriage is gone.

Civilization is the major cause of broken marriages. Everybody wants to belong, they don't care if they are ready or not.. they just go into marriages for the glamour. With time people will see no need for marriages..

Marriage is hardwork and not easy. Is like studying phd. You can wake up one morning and give up. There is no definite reason. If you say cheating, people forgive their spouses and go on to stay long. If you say quarrels, couples forgive and go on to heal. So their is no reason. Like I said marriage is hardwork and not for everyone. You can wake up one day and hate your wife with passion. The next day you are in love. For example, my wife once chatted her ex and some other guys. This is the same reason that will break a marriage. However we have been married for 8 years now. Is like we just met yesterday, I have decided to put in the work to make my marriage last long. Now people call us for counseling. Is not easy, you need God always to give you strength and wisdom.

BlongTrendies:
Sometimes, it could be as a result of not being able to forgive a spouse who erred.

Since you can't leave the marriage at that point, you wait for the trigger that breaks the camel back.

Just a little thing that means nothing to everyone becomes the cause of separation.

Staying back when you could leave just make things worse.

Marriage is not meant to be endured but enjoyed. When you have started enduring and tolerating so much just know it's time to step up and fix whatever went wrong.

Everyone has his or her elastic limit. You might just be hanging on because your limit has not been exceeded.

Let me know when this hits front page

Aptly said